Do you listen when your friend's need it, but have no one to listen to you?

United States
March 4, 2009 8:51am CST
I am always the go to person when people have problems. My friends all say that I am so easy to talk to and it always makes them feel better after they talk to me. I love feeling like I am helping them out. My problem is that I can't go to any of them when I need it. They are all busy with their own lives and problems and seem to always be too busy to chat when I need it. I just don't understand it. What do you do when you feel like you have NO ONE to talk to? I have tried just writing out my feelings, but then I get upset even more. I just want to feel like at least one of my friends cares about what I have to deal with in my life. I wish for once it wasn't all about them. It isn't that I am always upset or always needing them. I am usually the fun one out of the bunch when we all go out. I am the first one to introduce myself to someone new. I tend to have fun no matter what the situation. Maybe that is the problem. Maybe they all think my problems can't be that bad because I don't show my emotions in that light. What are your opinions?
2 people like this
7 responses
@Jae2619 (1483)
• United States
5 Mar 09
I, myself have the same issues. Most of my friends are single mothers, or just single, and they are always having man troubles or something else and feel the need to call and complain to me about it, but once i turn the conversation to well my daughter has been sick, or something to that effect they all the sudden have to go and don't have the time. I have honestly have distanced myself from them, and though I care about them, they need to grow up and realize that life it's always about them.
@jshekhar (1562)
• India
4 Mar 09
I have always been the one to support people when they need it. However, I never ask them anything in return. I believe in being strong enough to support myself and to come out of any situation without any help. When you expect someone to be there for you but the person does not turn it, it would hurt you real bad. Hence, I do not want to depend on anyone.
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11923)
• Guwahati, India
24 Apr 09
Him there is nothing to fret. as you are happy helping others you should be happy there only. If you wish for a return of any service the value is lost. There is a saying that if no body is coming along with you walk on yourself all alone. Might be you would get some people on the way
• United States
4 Mar 09
I have that same problem as well, with my family and friends but more so my family now, it was more my friends when I was in college. Everybody always wants my help and input on things, but when I need to talk they just dismiss my feelings. It does get very hard and emotionally draining, at least for me. Im so tired of hearing about other people's problems. Like you I tend to always be the light one in the situation, always smiling and trying to make people feel at ease. I do think that is one reason why they could think you really don't have any serious issues to talk about because your always in such a fun mood around them. I have come to that conculsion about myself. My family and friends just dont know how to respond when Im in a bad mood. I get the vibe of how dare you have a bad day, when I need to talk to you. I love my family and friends but sometimes it is a bit much to always be the shoulder to cry on and feeling like you have no were and no one to turn to.
@vasavi20 (293)
• India
4 Mar 09
i listen to my friends wen they me..and also i have friends who listen to me when i need them
1 person likes this
@kdinjax (25)
• United States
4 Mar 09
My friends listen to me and i listen to them it is like respect . If they are to busey to listen to you sounds like there not your true frinds hun. I would talk to them about it tell them how you are feeling.
1 person likes this
@liza369 (103)
• United States
7 Mar 09
Well I do listen to my friends when they have a problem. I am the person they all come to when they need to speak to someone or need advice. Just like I am there for my friends they are there 95% of the time when I need something.