Writing to the Dead

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Have you ever lost a loved one whom you miss so much that you wish every moment of the day you could just pick up the phone and call them? My mom passed away in 2006. She was my best friend, and the person I could always count on to keep me sane when it seemed like life was going topsy-turvy on me. So much has happened since her death, events that are upsetting, scary, painful, as well as joyful and full of pride and wonder. I can't count the number of times I've reached for the phone even though I knew she was no longer there to answer. I have found that talking to her, either in my head or out loud (when I'm pretty sure no one living can hear me) helps some. However, the thing that seems to help me the most is to write to her. I'll create journal entries as if they were letters, start them "Dear Mom", and just pour my heart out. I truly believe that she can see and hear us, that all of our loved ones have some awareness, especially when we pull them close to us with love, of what is going on in our lives after they cross through the veil. In light of that, I often feel silly doing these Letters to Mom, and so many of them start out something like, "Dear Mom, I know you already know about this, but...." Very often I'll be in tears by the time I get halfway down the page, but the tears are good ones. They purge and cleanse, and I always feel like a weight has been lifted from me when I finally close the page with, "Your loving daughter--" It's definitely not the same thing as hearing her voice, or seeing her face, our touching her hand. And it doesn't make me miss her any less; I'd give anything to see her again. But it helps. I'd love to hear from others who have done something similar--either writing or talking to their deceased loved ones--and if you feel that it helps you to deal with your loss in some way. I do, firmly, believe they can hear and see us, and have had many experiences to back up that belief. But that is a topic for another discussion, one which I'm sure has been revisited over and over here on myLot. I look forward to reading responses to this topic.