do you get mad when you husband goes home later than usual?

@maissj (111)
Philippines
March 19, 2009 5:29am CST
it's not like he's sooo late, my husband usually comes home around 6pm, but today, he said he just got on the bus, he's still in manila! (we're here in Batangas), i'm not really mad, but worried. i only stop worrying when he's already by my side. you see my biggest fear is if something happens to him while he's out, so i never stop worrying until he's safe and sound at home. and typing away here or blogging doesn't help to stop me from worrying... i think it's just my nature to be like this. so do you?
5 people like this
21 responses
@cream97 (29163)
• United States
19 Mar 09
Hi, maissj! The only time that I will get mad at him is when he comes home too late, to take me somewhere. If he promised to do a favor for me, and he shows up too late, then I will be mad. And if he also, needs to be home to help his son with his homework and comes home too late. I will get mad at him for this too. Also, when I really need him at home, and I have to take care of the kids, and I am extremely exhausted. If he is not home in time, I may get frustrated. I will start cursing and saying mean things about him. But, my husband usually gets in late, and I don't bug it. I am used to it. I always seem to find something to do to keep me preoccupied until he gets home. I do worry if something may happen to my husband too. My mind goes in many directions about the what ifs and what nots... I don't like it when my husband stays out so late when I am home alone with the kids. I get scared. I feel protected when he is home at night with me. These are the only times that I may get mad. But, I try not to get too mad at him.
2 people like this
• Philippines
6 Apr 09
how long have you been living together? things might change after several years. you should not be worried about your hubby, he's big enough to take care of himself. use your cellphone to communicate, send him text and ask for reply. just keep your self busy while your hubby is not around.
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
i think it doesn't matter the length of time we've been together, i think i am just a worrysome being, i tried keeping myself busy and he himself bought me things to keep me busy but still i worry, i know he's big enough to take care of himself and still i worry even if he calls me up, after an hour of no message or call, i still worry. maybe i just love him so much that i can't take my mind off him, but thanks for your advice,,,, and keep smiling!, mai
@Malitah (29)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
same here sis. and now that he's working abroad. i get mad when he doesn't even care to text me if whats happening to him out there. i guess that was our unique way of showing our love to our hubbies.
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
i agree, kainis di b? we never stop thinking about them, but sometimes, it seems that the moment they stepped out of the house they forget those they left at home waiting for them, sometime i would tell my husband to keep my picture at the back of his office ID and BOC gate pass, so that when he's not in the office or out of the house on his way to work, he'll see my picture and will always remember that i am waiting for his text as to his whereabouts..... hehehe, SMILE, MAI
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
same thing goes with me. no matter where he is, i worry a lot and i will just stop worrying until he reaches home safely. good thing now that a cellphone is invented and we can text each other on his whereabouts. but even while texting, i cant stop worrying until he's home. i guess the environment also becomes a factor that we can associate with this kind of emotion. coz nowadays, even buses and other public transportation vehicles are subject to crimes like hold up or something. and there are also cases of road accidents, so definitely, you won't stop worrying until you are sure that your husband is safe.
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
you're right! i wonder what would happen if cellphone is not invented and we have all these accidents and crimes out there? so we just can't help if we worry a lot for our man,...smile, mai
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Mar 09
My husband is the type of person who is never on time for anything. It's something I can't be mad about because that's just who he is. I find myself getting more frustrated now since I am pregnant. Usually he is bringing home some crazy craving that I asked for...I am mad that it's not home, not him lol.
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
you're right! we should get mad AT him, but with the situation that he's not yet home. i really feel so frustrated when i don't know where he is, or what time he's coming home.... sometimes even if i am very hungry, i don't have the nerve to eat dinner without him, but as they say, it's women's way of showing them we love them, he doesn't take it negatively though, he's okay with it, he says it makes him feel loved... SMILE, MAI
1 person likes this
• India
19 Mar 09
Worrying about the safety of someone we love is just one among the many traits which make us unique as women .I am same too.But I have this unshakeable faith in God .So I just call upon God and ask HIM to be with my loved ones.And I also believe that Que Sera sera...We cannot stop anything .So be at ease...
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
I believe that HE will take good care of my husband and those dear to me, but the problem with me is, i am not yet ready to face the thought of seeing them hurt or that something bad happened to them.... i know HIS will be done, but i'm just not ready to take if HIS will would shatter my life.... SMILE!
1 person likes this
@med889 (5954)
19 Mar 09
Well i must admit Im a bit like this though im not married and not living with him. I maintain that i should know if he has reached a place safe and sound. So everytime he reaches office he gives a call and when he has reached home he let me know. Even at 1 in the morning i don't mind but the moment i know he has reached then i can sleep peacefully. And nowadays it has become a habit, we do not find that weird like before. Sometimes my sleep just broke up at these picular hours. So its not totally in nature. It is WE who have chosen to do this way. And Yes i prefer this way than never caring. Sometimes if he forget to call i tend to worry but then it rarely happen once i talk to him.:-) So this is so common to care for the safety of your own people. For us it is vice versa.
1 person likes this
@maissj (111)
• Philippines
19 Mar 09
like you, i wanted to know if he reached his office safe, a text message will do, and i end up crying if he doesn't reply to my messages and i can't reach his phone. it's so frustrating to wait for a message or to call someone and the line's busy or the phone's off. at night, when he's still out, i can't sleep, even if i'm so tired and sleepy, i just can't close my eyes and sleep. it sometimes makes me grouchy and irritable.... but i think my husband's used to it, because he seldom goes home late and never forgets to text me whenever he's out or doing field work....
1 person likes this
@modstar (9608)
• Philippines
6 Apr 09
Don't you think that 6pm is a bit too early especially when one needs to commute from Manila to Batangas? I can't blame you for worrying though because my mom is like that too even at my age of 29. There's really nothing we can do about it. It's just like a person crossing the road, we cannot tell when he'll get hit by a car. Like the response above, let's just leave his fate to God.
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13651)
• United States
26 Mar 09
Hubby's housebound so he doesn't do the whole going out thing but even when he was able to get out he'd come right home after work. He's never been one to go out to bars, hang out with friends or any of that. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**[/b]
1 person likes this
• Netherlands
20 Mar 09
Hubby never leaves the house without me that I don't worry about him. I feel the same way, as soon as he walks in the door and I see he is OK then I am OK! My Hubby knows this also and he is the same way about me...something is missing and just not right until we are together! My Hubby is very considerate though and if he thinks he is going to be a bit late he will always call me and let me know...he knows I will still worry but I also know that for that time he is OK. I do the same thing also, I think it is just courteous to call and let someone know when you are going to be late!
@HelloMickey (1656)
• Hong Kong
20 Mar 09
I had the same worry before, and it caused a lot of problems between my hubby and I, he understood my anxiety about his late, but it indeed affected him as well. After I knew I have a generalized anxiety disorder, I have changed a lot and I always tell myself that my anxiety is not real, what I fear is not likely to happen. So now, I won't get mad when he was late, he must have his reasons.
@youless (99516)
• Guangzhou, China
20 Mar 09
I feel the same like you. Usually my husband will be at home on regular time. If he has extra work to do, then he will make a call. If he is late but without calling us, I will start to get worried about him. I am afraid there are any accidents or crimes happen to him. I feel released unless he's home. I love China
1 person likes this
@gzlgzl123 (224)
• China
20 Mar 09
Take it easy,if my wife goes home later than usual for many times,I must know where she stayed or who she togethered with and what she did in a day.That's important.If I don't do so,she may be think I never love her.So we must show our care to each other.This will make our love forever.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Mar 09
If I were you, I will not get mad as long he comes home safe and not cheating on me
1 person likes this
@Amber4106 (541)
• United States
19 Mar 09
I get very frustrated when my partner comes home late, and especially when he doesn't call to inform me that he will be later. It's not so much that I'm angry at him, I just worry about him making it home safely. Now that we have a daughter, I stay here and take care of her while he goes to work. Sometimes he goes out for a drink after he's done working, and gets home late. I tried to tell him that we have her to think about, and I don't need to be bailing him out of jail for a DUI, or visiting him in the hospital, or even worse, burying him!!! I absolutely hate it when he drinks and drives, and it worries me more now that I do have a child to think about!
1 person likes this
@Jennlk84 (4216)
• United States
19 Mar 09
I do not get upset with my fiancee when he gets home late from work but it is mostly because he is currently a graduate student and his work hours always vary. Also, I trust him. And we keep in touch throughout the evening so that I know when to expect him home for dinner. I think it is a natural tendency to worry - but if this is a regularly occurring thing, that can't be good for you to always be worried! Have you talked to him about this?
1 person likes this
@icegermany (2524)
• India
19 Mar 09
i can understand, it is really worrying when husband is late and many kind of things come in mind and it really scares. my husband goes by car to his office and when i was in india i use to get more worried as the traffic is very badthere and he have to travel the high way where to much of accident risk as myself i have seen many ccidents taking place when i se to go tomy college nd hence i use to be worried for m husband.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Mar 09
nice topic
1 person likes this
@Anne19 (300)
• Philippines
19 Mar 09
When I was still a wife, I wait for my husband until he gets home no matter how late it is. I usually get mad b because its unsafe for him to roam around that late. I guess wives get really mad because of the anxiety that they felt while waiting for their better half. And sometimes men can not understand that, all they thought was they have been nagged. Men, they are really hard to understand!!! ............ lol
1 person likes this
@mymytri (2032)
• India
19 Mar 09
No.I dont go mad.If he is busy at office he calls me up and tell when he can return.If he didn't come home by that time i will call him and enquire where he is at that time.His office not too far to our home so he come back quickly.I too feel little bit worried if he is late sometimes.Many woman are like that.Happy mylotting...
1 person likes this