What will you do when he/she tells you let's separate or break up?

@n30wing (4768)
Philippines
March 19, 2009 9:29pm CST
For me for sure I'll be shock! I'll try to talk and seat on it, ask her why? What's the problem? Did I do something wrong? What change your mind completely? Are you not happy with me? Don't you love me anymore? Is there someone else? If there is no one else I'll try to ask her let's give another chance, will fix the problem, and still try things to work it out. Letting go just like that is not easy thing, it hurts specially if you know you both still love each other. I know there are no perfect relationships, it's just how we handle life together, and coping up with our mistakes. No one is perfect, still even were not perfect we try still to show the person in our own way how much she/he is important. Would you just understand the person, and just go, or just hold on? What will you do? Have a nice day to all of you?
3 people like this
19 responses
@forslahiri (1042)
• India
20 Mar 09
Hi, Yes.It will be shocking indeed.afterall Love is TRUSt & that trust is no more existing.Any Lover will be shocked.But to know Why?What?etc will be quite normal tendency. Most of the cases the reasons are 'Silly' or'Just eye-wash'. I'll Give best shot to counsel/convince that together 'we can overcome'.But if I ultimately find that it was pre-determined, i will quit quietly.I cannot Love(by force),it's not my cup of tea.I'll cry,possibly scream...but alone..in my dark room! =Lahiri,Kolkata,India.
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Hi my friend forslahiri, for me I'll really keep myself alone for a while, if she really don't want me anymore. But I tried to listen to her reasons, there was no 3rd party involve, she does still love me, but I know and understand that I took her for granted, and feel sorry about it. Anyway for the passed weeks I devoted and focus with my work, I am working hard it's for us it's for our future. I love her so much, that my life revolves to her. She did appreciate it, she did understand me. I given myself a one day off just being with her, and catching up time with her and she was so happy. I miss her so much, I even put something in her email saying how much she means to me. Anyway have a nice day to you friend! God bless!
1 person likes this
@helole (21)
• China
20 Mar 09
You should ask her if she love me anymore,if not,just let she go.If she don't say anything,that means you still in her heart,you need to find the problem what divided you two!Don't give it up easily!
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Hi helole, well I asked her if she still love me, she answered me yes I do, is there some one, she answered me no one, just you in my life. I know I have taken her for granted this passed weeks, because of my work, but I do miss her so much and she doesn't know that. I work so hard because it's also for her, it's our future that counts to me a lot now. She understand me and hugged each other so tight. I given myself a one day off just being with her and really she appreciated that. She was so happy that I gave and coping up the time with her. I pray that there is no end only always beginning for both of us! Have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
@HelloMickey (1656)
• Hong Kong
20 Mar 09
I was a fractious girl when I dated my hubby before. He had suggested to break up a while as he found he could not make me happy. At that moment, I was shocked, I asked every questions you wrote, and finally I found he loved me so much, he told me the truth that he was afraid he was not my prefect match, so I told him I could control my temper, I would learn how to do it. So we were together again.
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Thanks for that advice I needed it very much. Anyway there was no 3rd party and she told me she still love me, I know it's my fault again cause of my work, I taken her for granted, but I did miss her so much she just don't know that, I am working so hard for our future I told her that and I wanna spend my life with her, she just need to understand everything I am doing it's for us. Have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
first ill bring him to a peaceful place so that he can think a million times. ill ask him if he is sure about his decision that he wants to part our ways. and ask him is there someone else. If he will answer that he is sure that he wants to break us apart then i have nothing to do with it i wont force him to stay with me ill accept if what is his decision. It hurts i know but its stupid if you will beg on him to stay then later on you will found out that he is cheating on you. I'll set him free. Someone is deserving for your love. Love can wait.... theres a right time for love...
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
I will not beg or force her. But breaking up with no 3rd party and still could work things out, I don't think so I will just let go easily, and still she love me so am I. I think there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, but it's how we handle our relationship. As long as we love each other I'll try to work out things for her. Anyway have a nice day to you!
1 person likes this
@gracie04 (4554)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
Just like you, i'll be shocked of course.. i'd try to ask him questions such as why? are you seeing other girls? don't you love me anymore? what have i done to make you say that? aren't you happy with me? if the problem is with me then i'd promise him that i'll change for the better, i'll try to patch things up.. i'll try my very best to work it all out..
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Same here, I think I'll let go if there is a 3rd party, and if she doesn't love me anymore. That I will respect her decision. But if she loves me, whey then break up or separate ways. I'll change for the better or things should work it out for improvements. Patching it up things better for both of us. Anyway have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
@mods196621 (3656)
• Philippines
20 Mar 09
I will be shock too! with a big question mark (?) On the first place i will know the reasons why and what wrong i have done. I will let him speak the real reasons why and to convince me that i am deserving to left. If we feel both in love to each other then why to separate. It really hurt me if this could be happen... Hope not.! Have a nice day friend!!
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
I never expect she will open that thing to me my friend. There is no 3rd party involves it's only us. I know I taken her for granted but it's for us for our future. I know that she needed time for us too. Still she listened to my reasons, and just answered me I am trying even though it's hurting me, understand everything even though the pain is to much, and she did stay. God it's not easy to break up that easily when you given her time, all the efforts, thinking of the future for us. I wont let go easily my friend. Anyway have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
@hanah87 (1835)
• Malaysia
20 Mar 09
I am very shock when my ex tell me he want to break because have other lover.We have been together for 3 year.I beg and try to make he come back to me but fail.Then i found another love....
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Well that was my first reaction when she wants a split up. I can't accept it just like that cause I truly love her and my life revolves to her. I asked her her reason why and she answer it honestly that she is getting hurt. I know this passed weeks I taken her for granted. What I am doing it's for us and that is my work. I cried cause that is not a solution to our problem. I know even I hurt her, she tries to understand me more. Anyway I am happy that you find a better man who could make you happy and deserving of your love. We all deserve to be happy and to be love. Have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
@tjdas83 (178)
• Malaysia
20 Mar 09
I will definitely talk to my partner and find out what is really bugging him. If he doesn't feel like it will work out or if he is not willing to work things out, then I would have to let him go. One-sided love is never a good thing for both parties. Either we do it together, or go our separate ways because the pressure is on one side and that's not a strong partnership. We should always know when to let go and when to keep fighting. Living in denial can be frustrating and unfulfillable.
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Yes that is true when it's only a one side thing relationship. You understand everything but your partner doesn't understand you, that is kind a unfair. You do things for both of you, still your partner doesn't appreciate it. Yes your right with there is a time to let go even though you love your partner very much. Then getting hurt! Anyway have a nice day to you!
1 person likes this
@sameroad (3180)
• United States
20 Mar 09
I am not sure what i would do... I would first ask them some questions and see if we couldn't work things out if i didn't feel the same way and still want to be in a relationship with them...but if they didn't want to be with me and then i don't know... i would be really sad and depressed i'm sure... and i would just have to deal with it and let time pass so the pain could heal and i would have to find someone new...
1 person likes this
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Well same thing but it's to hard just letting go or respecting her decision cause I love her so much. I really cried, asking her what is the reason, there is no 3rd party involve. But problems to fix, changes, and a better life for us. I know I took her for granted this passed weeks cause of my work, and try to work out things and coping up time with her. It's to hard to just break up with reasons that you can still work it out! Still she listened even though I know she's very hurt, trying to understand everything and still holds on. Have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
Well, I have been through that before. It's hard to accept at first but I have to really accept it. There is no point in sticking to a relationship if one doesn't want it anymore. I always let go. There was a time when it was me who called for a break up but the guy didn't like the idea. he did everything to iron out things but it didn't work out.
1 person likes this
@aisaellis22 (6449)
• United States
21 Mar 09
Hello n30wing! You're right, it's so hard to let go of someone you love but if that person is not happy with me anymore, although it's hard, I have to let go of that person. But first, I will ask the person first what's the reason why he wants to break up with me or are there other things I can do just to change his mind. But if he will say he fell out of love to me, then that's the time I let go.
1 person likes this
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
21 Mar 09
It depends upon the situation bro... If he explained the reasons why he wants a split up., I mihght just let him go...
1 person likes this
@parvezjs (422)
• India
20 Mar 09
Yes it will be greatly shocking if we love him/her the most, from heart and cant live without that person. I will try to know what's the reason behind it first. If she needs some change in me or is upset with my behavior and so want to separate then I will assure her that I will try to change. If she doesn't likes me anymore then for her happiness I will let that person go. I will never force our relationship on that person. I will try not to let her go but still wont tie her to be with me as love cannot be forced.
1 person likes this
@Archie0 (5175)
20 Mar 09
Well when the person is not intrested in the relation and want to break off, i dont think there is any point for us to be in it or try and explain him/her that this is not right what they doing.It is their freedom and right, they thought of leaving you because they found something wrong in you, just because there was something wrong in that person there was no cope up, or feeling left may be thats why. We cant nag the person to be with us, just because we feel for them, we will be forcing them then and this is not right at all. it is their wish completely to be with us or no. We can take care for ourseleves even after being in pain of being away from them, but we cant see them in pain and be happy too.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Mar 09
I would probably hold on at least a first but the right thing to do would be to let go.
1 person likes this
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
20 Mar 09
Of course I would ask what's going on and why make him say that. Becaue there muyst be a reason for somebody to want to break up with somebody, it is not like I don't want vegetables so I will never eat it. And if there was really something wrong besides cheating, I would try to figure out and maintain the relationship.
1 person likes this
@skysuccess (8880)
• Singapore
20 Mar 09
n30wing, I do not think we should be taking such a thing at face value especially when it is being mentioned for the first time in a tiff but should be serious enough to recognize there's a problem for both parties to resolve. Hence, both parties must be mature and serious enough to sit down, talk and work it out. Love being mutual exclusive there should always be both parties facing the problems and working together to maintain the relationship. As the saying goes: "Love is not about looking at each other; but looking together at one collective direction" we may have our differences and imperfections but if we can both learn to accommodate and accept each others imperfection then I believe everything will be perfect between both parties. Getting together is never easy or a mere coincidence, though it may take a moment to fall in love with each other but it will take a lifetime to forget a person. So, we should always learn to love and cherish each other in this special and wonderful experience called relationship. Cheers.
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
23 Mar 09
I like your response skysuccess, it's how 2 people work out things, even their worst part or good part. No relationship is perfect, it's how both of you understand each other, love each other and accepting each other, even faults. There is no 3rd party, she still love me, but yes I have taken her for granted, but do miss her so much she just don't know. I am doing everything just for our future. I've work so hard so I could give her everything, and her family won't say anything that I am using her. Life is so simple and telling her how come your making it complicated. I don't wanna let go but do fix everything for us and she understand now. Anyway have a nice day to you! God bless!
1 person likes this
• Singapore
23 Mar 09
n30wing, I really hope that things will eventually work out for the both of you and with the success in resolving the situation, may the both of you grow stronger in this relationship. Take care and thanks for the BR. Have a nice day.
@parvezjs (422)
• India
20 Mar 09
Yes it will be greatly shocking if we love him/her the most, from heart and cant live without that person. I will try to know what's the reason behind it first. If she needs some change in me or is upset with my behavior and so want to separate then I will assure her that I will try to change. If she doesn't likes me anymore then for her happiness I will let that person go. I will never force our relationship on that person. I will try not to let her go but still wont tie her to be with me as love cannot be forced.
@parvezjs (422)
• India
20 Mar 09
Yes it will be greatly shocking if we love him/her the most, from heart and cant live without that person. I will try to know what's the reason behind it first. If she needs some change in me or is upset with my behavior and so want to separate then I will assure her that I will try to change. If she doesn't likes me anymore then for her happiness I will let that person go. I will never force our relationship on that person. I will try not to let her go but still wont tie her to be with me as love cannot be forced.