when do you say its over?

Philippines
April 7, 2009 2:26am CST
This is a story of my friend. Before he met her boyfriend, he was in a relationship and she was actually the second wheel in the relationship. But then the guy realize that he love my friend more than her current gf. So what he did, he stop his realtionship with the girl. But this girl make everything to stop her bf not to break up with her. She gave her everything, expensive things and she gave her all attentions to the guy. She even tried twice to kill herself to make the guy feel guilty and go back to her. We'll actually she won, the guy still see her but he still have this relation with my friend. The guy decided to go out of the country to escapes from her but when he was about to go, he found out that his visa was lost. ( i dont know how it happen but it happen, its true). One day i saw my friend crying and she confided that the girl is pregnant. so this is the situation, every weekend, the guy is with the girl and he only see my friend when he can find time to escapes from the girl. She sometimes harassed my friend. Now this is the question, i don't think he can ever escapes the girl most especially now that she's pregnant. When can we say that we will stopped the relationship even if we love the guy so much.
5 people like this
14 responses
@neha2k94u (406)
• India
7 Apr 09
This is a very critical situation, I couldn't understand why did the boy had a relationship with her if he dint liked her... Now there is no way to escape and even he shouldn't... He cant leave her this way...
2 people like this
@rsa101 (37932)
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
I really think its not worth fighting for anymore because the man could not even make a stand fro their relationship. I think its time to move on already, and there is no point in fighting for it since he made her impregnated whether it is her but he gave in so he is part of the deal already. Give up and move on.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
You gave me an idea of another discussions. thanks
1 person likes this
@iamsolucky (1241)
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
Oh, this is too complicated situation, but it was the choice of the parties at the very beginning. The guy still entered into another relationship without ending his current, and the other girl also entered in that relationship even she knows that the guy has a gf. Well for me, its hard for all of them. I think the girl must be strong enough to accept that the guy already want another girl. The guy must learn how to fight his feelings and not just going on with the flow just because his gf gives him expensive things. The other girl must exit, in a way not to say goodbye, but to make it better for her, thinking she will get a better guy. happy mylotting and smile always!
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
I haven't experienced that situation. But this is my share. If the girl is pregnant, then I guess the man doesn't have the choice right? He is responsible for the child. And by the way, in the first place, why did they do it if the guy is already kinda sick of her. It's hard but, your friend will get hurt even more if this continues. I know love is on the line, but this time, I don't think it is wise anymore. Do you know that the woman can sue the man if this situation goes to worse? She will ask half of share of what the man earns just to support the child. He can't abandon the child because sooner or later it would hunt him. Sorry for your friend though, but it wise to stop this. This isn't going to go well if this continues. And it is not healthy for her if that woman keeps doing this and that to her if you know what I mean. So, this is my opinion. It is still your friends choice.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
You're right, i told my friend that how come that the girl get pregnant. If he didn;t like her anymore, he can't stand to make love with her. He knows the consequences of what will happen, 1 is getting pregnant and 2nd the girl might think that there is hope because he can't resist her. But yes, it still my friend decisions if she wants to leave him or to go on with the relationship.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
for me, i can say this relationship should be ended when the guy is playing me around. especially if my bf impregnated the girl that he's seeing with i think theres no reason anymore to hold him back because their is another life being involve now. For the sake of the child i will let him go, eventhough i still love him.
@emma1987 (107)
• China
7 Apr 09
I think your friend should stop the relationship with that man.It is not worth to stay with that man.Your friend loves that man very much i think so she would not stop the relationship maybe.Love is blind which will make us did something of stupid.
1 person likes this
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
8 Apr 09
I am not sure what you want to hear, because there is nothing that you can do to change the circumstances, and as for your friend, you and I know she is in for a world of hurt, because she is with a man that doesn't have the courage to end one relationship before getting involved with another so now he has two women he can get all his satisfaction with. my question is Who is the winner in this situation, he is no doubt about it, because he wouldn't end one relationship before starting another and both women are the losers because they are fighting over some one that can't make up his mind or perhaps doesn't want to give either up
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
7 Apr 09
it doesn't seem he can escape this pregnant woman although the baby may not even be his, knowing that she will do anything to keep him and seems capable of doing unimaginable things just to do so the missing visa? I think we know who the culprit is it's too bad that this man can't make his stand but then again why would someone love a man like that? not too late for your friend to move on and she has to move on before she gets deeper into such messy love triangle it doesn't seem to me this man really loves your friend anyway if he does, he will end the previous relationship no matter what but he doesn't so it's your friend who has to move on leave these couple alone, I'm sure she will find someone else with more courage
@bamakelly (5191)
• United States
7 Apr 09
It sounds like a difficult situation for your friend. I know that I would have to try to move on especially when that other person seemed to have moved on. The pregnancy issue seems a little confusing and the trying to take one's own life is definitely not the answer to this situation. It is very hard to let go of a special person sometimes but we just might find another person in the future. You just need to give things time to heal and then continue on with life. A lot of this is probably easier said then done. We all get hurt in life by a loved one in one way or another. It sometimes seems like there is no avoiding it. But these things can make us stronger too. Pregnancy can definitely change things. That child has to come first no matter what these other people might want.
@suveer35 (98)
• India
7 Apr 09
Hi charlenmendoza ,Well first of all don't mind but your friend is really a stupid(forgive me 4 this again).The man is just taking advantage of her by giving her the reasons of the other girl.A girl can never get pregnant if a Man doesn't wants right so how come this happen.actually he is enjoying both your friend and that girl at the same time.What I would suggest is just tell your friend to stop this relationship right at this moment of time.I can understand its very difficult but still if she manages to do this early It would be better for her
@gxyywhyzy (450)
• China
8 Apr 09
oh,it is so complex,the poor guy,he has too many girls to deal with.even only two,also is too more.because one gf is enough,nobody need another.the first one loves him so deep and the second one should be far away from him,i mean,the guy should give up the second girl.after all he loved the first one and now he is still worried about her.so,i suggest the poor guy live a peace life with the first gf.
@garyc09 (132)
7 Apr 09
yawch, painfull situation, this is about you right? you need to stop treating this guy like a god, the simple factor is you only love him because he doesn't care about you, if he was smuthering you with too much attention you wouldn't want him. you wouldn't, i have researched into this before and the simple factor is its happened now and you can't change it you need to protect yourself more and not treat them too good otherwise they take advantage of it. Love doesn't matter at this point, hes ruining your life.
@flyrock (58)
• China
8 Apr 09
as usual,love story is blue.sometimes have a clear choice is impossible,if possible ,choose the one he love most.to tell the truth,tell people what to when are in love is very difficult.they will know what they are truly need,and everything will be over and will be alright.
• United States
7 Apr 09
There is no way the guy is going to be able to escape from the baby. He got her pregnant so therefore it is his responsbility to be there for the child - no only with money but with love and attention as well. So therefore that girl will always be in his life. Now the girl - I would tell her she needs to move on because guess what, there was nothing truthfully holding that guy to his ex. He choose to believe all her complaints and all her attempts to win him over and we fell for them and is now trapped. And if he wants to spend more time with that girl than your friend then truthfully who does he really have feelings for? It seems like he mostly wants to have his cake and eat it too.