Are non-voice communication harmful to relationship?

April 8, 2009 8:01am CST
Absolutely! I had several fights with my wife regarding this. Most of the time, since we could not tell intonation when texting, chatting, using snail mail or email, the messages are misunderstood. Or sometimes we accidentally use all caps when typing. The reciever of the messages thinks that we are angry. And sometimes when I am sleeping I tend to write messages that are not that well thought. What are your thoughts?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@redmike (153)
• Philippines
1 Jun 09
as a psych grad. yes, it is very harmful. silence, sometimes, in an argument, treated as agreed or "you agreed" or sometimes, you accept what was been asked. But now, as time passes, more couple (especially the married once) main problem is misunderstanding. they never talk or make any small talk about the problem they knew that lead to big misunderstanding. healthy relationship need a healthy communication. in a business, for example, if you didnt communicate with them regularly,you may loose them. They might back-out if they knew you're not making any effort to talk to them. and then later on, you may never contact them anymore if you wish to discuss something to them. THey may not believe in you anymore.
@ulqu1orra (307)
• Philippines
16 Apr 09
You're right about it, its harmful to communicate with your special through means of texting chatting and other stuffs that non-verbal than not talking in front of each other for a while. If you do not talk in a while because of any reason then you meet and talk with each other face to face, definitely you can solve any problems that lies ahead when your from each aside from communicating with each through this things that lessen your thoughts and feelings for each other.
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
13 Apr 09
I guess knowing that its easy for sms messages to get misinterpreted, you should be more careful about how you construct your words and the receiving party should on the other hand be more considerate and give the other party a benefit of a doubt. You should not immediately assume that the other party meant to hurt or enrage you. Its not just non-verbal communications actually, even verbal communication can be misinterpret, the only difference is you are able to see the facial expression of the person saying it.
@migenKC (792)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
im on a long distance relationship and i know how it feels when you cannot touch ur partner.. how much more when you cant even hear his voice... OMG!
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
True enough.. I have this problems sometimes too. It's just hard to know exactly how a person say what s/he feels through mails, texts, and chats. Somewhat, I think it depends on a person how he should write it down and explain further more the details. Like for example of you being sleepy, might as well add that to your email, chat or text that, maybe there's some words that you might missed or forgotten so like try to bear with you.. I'm sure she'll understand. As for me, I try to explain every details so I wouldn't get miscommunication cause I hate that. Patience, as always, a part of a relationship, so put more patience to your communication. Afterall, wives like to know how are things with their husbands..
@online_jon (1476)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Hi king4aday, a pleasant morning to you my friend. For me, i think a long distance relationship is very hard and full of trials, especially when communicating to each other. If you are only chatting with your love ones, i think there is a great possibility that may cause a fight and trouble because sometimes their is accident when you didn't notice that when writting a message, you accidentaly push the COPS LOCK button which causes for the reader to notice that "it's all big letters" which means showing of anger. With this matter it causes misunderstanding to each other, but if you are not far from each other and talking face to face, she will understand you because of the emotion you show. Well, i think in some chatting there are also EM0TI0N which called EM0TIC0NS, which is one way of showing emotion when chatting, but as i know most of the people who are busy in chatting no longer use EM0TIC0NS that's why sometimes they misinterpret each other message. I think even in voice communication most of the people cause some Argument because of the bad reception of their phone, one reason why some phones having a bad reception it's because of the location which is very far and last is if the location is not civilized. Well, my friend king4aday i have a sort of adviced with this matter. May be sometimes if you have enough money, why do you suprise your love ones by visiting her with out notification, i am sure she will be suprised with that and she will be smile with that kind, especially when you she's angry with you and try to bring some flowers. Hehe... lol. Sometimes, when yot have misunderstanding? You must say sorry personally. Well, that's all my own opinion my friend, i hope i give a good simple advice with you my friend! Thamk you! That's all my response with this forum topic discussion entitled "are non-voice communication harmful to relation". Well, in summary i agree with you that a non-voice communication is very harmful to your relation. Thank you! Good day again! Happy posting here in mylot and happy earning to us.
@eichs1 (1934)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
You mean non-verbal communication or in cases of written messages, reading between the lines. Well, for one thing, we have to review what we have written before sending them. That way, we can eliminate some mistakes. For example, all caps words are not that hard to notice. Review should also be done specially if we are emotional when writing our piece. Oftentimes, our emotions can be felt in the words we used. Another thing to avoid misunderstanding is to know who you are communicating with. How does he/she perceives when you say "I love you" out of the blue? Does he/she thinks that you are just being romantic or he/she is the type that will take this as a sign that you have committed something wrong and trying to atone for such sin? The more we know and understand who we are talking with, the more we can avoid touching their sensitivity.