relationships as a daughter to mother or father

United States
April 18, 2009 7:48pm CST
i know, for me, i have always been closer to my mother. my parents split up when i was two and my dad wasn't around again until i was 14, so there's a whole lot of time there that he wasn't there for. i know he regrets every minute he couldn't be with me and my sister and now things have worked out in such a way that my parents are now back together and remarried but for one reason or another, i still feel closer to my mom than my dad. i went a lived with my dad for a while before they got back together but i don't have the kind of closeness with him that i do with my mother. i know he wishes he had that bond with me. i don't know if its my fault that i have a hard time opening up to him, since he wasn't there for such a huge part of my life. maybe its just me subconsciously trying to protect myself from being hurt again. how are you with your relationships, between mom vs. dad?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@carrine (2748)
• Philippines
19 Apr 09
well i grow up with no daddy around. and i never met him ever!.so only my mom, but were not that closed also with my mom.
@lvyanyan (42)
• China
19 Apr 09
People say that daughter will be closer to father and son will be closer to mother.Sometimes I do not think so.Maybe mother seems to be a little more weaker,so we want to protect her from hurt.But i think you shuld think about your father's advantages,his kindness and care to you.your mother have forgiven him and accepted him, that indicates that thereis love between your parents.so try to understand them.you will not know the love from your parents until you became parent youself!
• United States
19 Apr 09
As for me my parents were never married...engaged yes. I have always had that unseparatable bond with my mother. My father came and went and felt he put me on the backburner after he married ( a wedding I was invited to) then he had two children by his wife. I never really asked him for anything but when I did he never came through and broke his promises. Now I am married and have three beautiful children and my father and I couldnt be any closer. It takes a man to stand up at my church and give me FATHEER blessings and apologize. I love him for that and forgive him. :)
@busyB4 (875)
• United States
19 Apr 09
My parents have always been together , but I really think from what you said, you are right in feeling you might get hurt again! I am glad he is wanting to be involved with your life but trust is a hard thing to regain after it is lost. I am sure you and your mom spend some grieving time together too and have just been closer so that is to be expected. I mean she has been there for your ups and downs in life. Maybe with time, you will feel closer but hun, don't blame yourself. Just be thankful they both love you and give it some time to build.