life without tension
23 Apr 09
interesting topic. I am not an expert but I have some opinions... Perhaps it may not be a good idea to forget all about the bad moments... It seems that anything associated with those bad experiences will work against us for a while... For instance, if a person witnessed a certain traumatizing event that happened when the fireworks were loudest, s/he may feel bad any time fireworks are set off. I think it is called "association effect". Perhaps the cure is to have better experiences during similar associated events, such that the "old" unpleasant feelings that used to be associated seem to be "overlayed in the mind" with pleasant, or at least neutral events. There is a saying: " we are all wounded; some seem they are not so for many reasons e.g. attitude..." Cheers
1 person likes this
25 Apr 09
that's a great idea. I always handle bad things that happened to me in this way. it applyies to me pretty well. i find that just avoiding difficuties is not a perfect solution. facing them bravely will eventually win. I don't know whether it applies to others too. it depends. We all hope life is happy forever, but it can't come true. We must come arcross happiness and difficuties during our whole lives. If you meet them with calm,you have matured.
• United States
23 Apr 09
I have a few things I can offer to you that I have done myself! First and foremost I have learned to realize that the past is just that the past I refuse to let something that hurt or bothered me in my past to continue to do so. It hurt me then so I will not allow it to hurt me now. If I cant change what is happening then I cant change it I do not stress myself over( well most of the time I am getting better at that one)! Things that have happened to me in my past has made me into the person I am today and gosh I love me! and last but very important "Never Deprive Anyone of Hope(including yourself), It maybe all they have. People can only do to you what you allow them to do ( in most cases)
23 Apr 09
I agree remembering could sometimes be too stressful, depressing even. I've had my moments where everything seemed hopeless, but life is always a choice.. you could either choose to wallow in it or try to free yourself from it.. I guess there is no easy way of forgetting except by filling your now with happier memories and trying to live a fuller life.