how do you begin to ......

United States
April 30, 2009 2:27pm CST
how you begin to rebuild a relationship with your mom whenit seems as if she dont want to? i moved out when i was 18, my mom begged me to stay as if she really cared. i left and have never returned. but i always tried to keep in contact with her. as the years have gone by i have had 3 boys, now 14,12,10, in which she has seen them 3 times. she goesin ohases she will call and tell my kids she sent xmas, and low and behold 5 years later and we still havet received it. i feel that it is important to try to make a decent relationship with her, after all she is my mom. but it just seems futal.
1 person likes this
5 responses
• India
1 May 09
I dont understand you at all! On the first hand you inform us that your mother begged you to stay with her but You refused to heed her begging and went away on your own free will and never returned that too on your own will and at the same time you doubt if she really cared for you? You have chosen your own path and in that path your mother wasn't the priority for you, so why blame her at all? It was you who never returned back and want to justify it by your efforts of being in contact with her. I can't find fault in your mom I guess its you who been too busy with your own life and didn't cared for any physical contact or communication when she needed you. Now I guess she adjusted to a life where she has resigned to the fact that SHE isn't important in your life. Watch out you have 3 kids and you be old one day and you might be in the same shoe in which your mother is. I am sorry for her.
• United States
1 May 09
OK I should hve been more clear about the situation. I had left and never returned your right. But i failed to inform everyone that, she had left me with my grandmother at age 3 and never returned until i was 9, when she had my brother and called upon me, upon arriving at her home i became veryclear that i was there to babyit my then 1 y/o brother, my life was turned upside down. I went from a very loving home with my gandparents to a home that i was isolated and left to grow up very fast. and yet she always treated me as if i was her maid. upon all that i still yern to have a realtionship with her.
• India
1 May 09
Well now you been able to tell what this all about is!I feel sorry for you but then I will ask you to forgive and never the darkness grow in yourself. That will be much better for you and for your future.
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
9 May 09
just the thought that you want to have a good relationship with your mother after all that she had done would be quite enough for fate to grant you something decent someday. don't worry about your kids. they're wiser than we think.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
1 May 09
It is not unusual for a teen to not get along with a parent. She is your mom and the only one you will ever have. I don't know how bad things were between the two of you but i do think if possible it is best to make amends. Your kids deserve to know their gram and your mother deserves to know her grandchildren. I think you should maybe invite her to your home for coffee or a visit and reach out.
@Amberina (1541)
• United States
30 Apr 09
We can't pick our parents and some people aren't cut out to be parents. I think it's just something your going to have to accept and move on. I know it's upsetting I have a parent who isn't all that into me as well but I had a step parent who loved me more than anything. So that's who I consider to be my real parent is the step one. I hope you can find some healing with this I know it's a hard thing to be going through. Maybe you should seek some therapy or write your feelings down in a journal that sometimes helps me.
• Philippines
2 May 09
Everybody must be thankful for we have our parents without them we will not be here in this world. In your case since you have your situation now, Pray ask the Lord for His forgiveness and His great guidance, call your mother ask for her forgiveness too and show that you are humble, remember your character talks even though you are not saying anything, show your love to your mother nobody will do that except you because you are her child, and I know she loves you very much