How do you get attention from your partner without verbally asking?

Philippines
April 30, 2009 11:41pm CST
I am in a long distance relationship. But it seems like my boyfriend's attention always goes somewhere else. Sure, he sends me text messages everyday to check if I've already eaten or what. However, when I try to engage him into long conversations over the phone, he's really not up to it. It's like he's only giving me attention just to check up on me. We're already in a long distance relationship, why can't he give me more attention? He used to flatter me, joke around, and so on. Now merely checks up on me, then goes off.
1 person likes this
4 responses
• China
1 May 09
You need patience in the long distance relationship.I suggest you can met your partner in a certain frequency.And you can send messages to him under the premise that i dosen't affect his work or study.In the text messages you can care for him much more,and let he feels your heart.
• Philippines
3 May 09
I send him messages, but he does not respond. I care about him, and I'm not hesitant to show it to him. But it seems like it's always me who initiates everything just for us to communicate. He used to be so persistent before. Now, I just don't know. :(
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• China
5 May 09
As you said,i suggest you examine wherther there are some problems or not between you and him.The long distance relationship is difficult,you can't see each other often,can't go to the cinema together etc.Once one of my friends suggested me to try a long distance relationship,but i gived up.I think i can't bear the lovesickness.
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• Canada
1 Jun 09
I've read that men aren't typically into long phone conversations. It sucks that you can't see each other face to face, but have you thought about setting a web cam date? that way he can see your face and how you respond to what he says. Men are very visual creatures!! Sometimes men will test you to see how far you'll let them wander. If you chase after him too much, he will keep running! So let him wander... eventually he will see that you're not paying attention and if he's worth keeping he will come running (or calling) back! Really though, sometimes if you pull back a little on the communication, it sparks their interest again. So go about your fabulous life, and dont drop everything to talk to him. talk and message back when you have a break from your busy, demanding day and he will appreciate that you gave him as much time as you did! Hope this helps :)
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• Canada
16 Sep 09
My husband and I were long distance for most of our engagement, and part of our marriage, because of his work situation. We had specific times when we would talk during the day. I would call him at 9 AM, and again at 9 PM, and we'd talk. We remembered things we wanted to tell eachother, and talked during those times. Since we knew the person would be talking, we were prepared to talk. Also, b ecause all we had was the phone, we knew it was important to talk. And there is nothing wrong with asking for more communication, and explaining it to him.
20 Feb 10
Men like to chase. If you nag him about not giving you more attention it will never work. Have you heard the saying "Actions speak louder then words?" well this rings more true with men and relationships. The more you pull toward him the more he will pull away. If you show him that you have a life and you are not dependent on him for your happiness and busy yourself a little more then usual and perhaps not always answer his calls, i think he will start to make plenty of time for you.