Child Support

wow, it is hard right? I know the law here is totally touch but what can they do cuz they both choose this way. I feel so sorry for everything here... but if you can talk to one of them to get back together then they will not have to go through this situation. Love is based on forget and forgive.

Actually it has nothing to do with whether you are a man or a woman. There are different rules for all different situations. Some men get arrested and some do not. I know men that owe hundreds of thousands in child support that are just walking around free and clear not paying a dime. I am not saying this is right or fair, but you can't make a blanket statement that women do not have to suffer consequences for not paying support when men do.

Life is not fair...if it were we'd be on an island soaking up sun ...right? child support...I have fought for it and given up in leiu of my girls having a relationship with their dad. My youngest daughter...the one that is still at home...age 15....her dad had so little to do with her growing up...so very little. He was court ordered to pay 60.00 per week which to his credit...he paid pretty regular. He had almost no involvement in her life but he complained to others that it was me that kept him from his daughter....never did...wouldnt. She wanted her dad to be a part of her life and it sounded as if he wanted to be. I offered to drop all child support in exchange for him being there for her on the nights that I work. He agreed and well...it has been over a year. He hardly ever ever sees her. He pays absolutely not a dime in child support. I do my best to raise her as I did my other girls. I will never stand in the way of them forming a relationship but I won't beat myself trying to force it either. as far as support...seen this go both ways and it all depends on the judge. your brother needs to figure out how to raise these kids without her support. it sucks and not easy at all but it can be done.

I completely agree that women get a way a lot easier then men. I am a women myself and I think it is ridiculous. My husband had a similar situation with his ex girlfriend. They have a son together that is now thirteen and she is worthless..and no I am not just saying this because she is his ex I am saying this because it is true. She was one of those people that was only a mom when it benefited her. There was no real custody order in place so how it worked was she had son full time while my husband had weekends. There were about a dozen times when he would have son for the weekend and then when it was time for him to go back to his mother she was no where to be found so we had to keep him and then she wouldn't show up for six months or so and tell the courts that husband had refused to give him back. There finally came a time when we finally had it finalized to where he lived with us full time because we were tired of her bull. During that time she was ordered to pay support in the amount of $3.90 since she didn't have a job and never has she didn't have to pay much, well it didn't matter because she didn't pay anyways. During the first three years she had us in court constantly complaining her support was too high and that she needed it lowered and the s*#t thing of it was was that the case was held in our county but she lived in a different county and didn't have transportation to get to our county(where she was originally from) so they would allow her to do a phone in while my husband had to take off work and traveled over thirty miles just for her to complain that she couldn't afford the not even four dollars in support...she could just sit on her butt in the comfort of her own house and complain~ It made us sick. My husband would have to call off work and lose pay for the day just because she was too lazy to get a job. Another thing she would pull is the pregnancy card..she would claim she couldn't work because she was pregnant...well I know thousands of women that work while pregnant, I was one~ I worked up until a few days before I gave birth and then after she had the baby she would claim she had to stay home for the first six week for maternity leave. Therefore giving her almost a year of excused time...the most she was ever ordered to pay was $9.80 and we never saw a dime because she was on county assistance and they could not take the states money to give to us(which I understand) but we could never understand why they couldn't order her to get a job. She had nothing to lose though because she didn't have a license or a job so there was nothing to take or garnish. This was five years ago and we haven't seen a penny and we just received a letter in the mail the other day saying they were stopping her support because after a year they are unable to locate her(we haven't heard from her either) so she was able to skate by scott free without ever paying a penny yet when my husband was paying on him while son was with his mother they made dang sure he never missed a payment~ In fact he was still paying on him while he lived with us because they took their sweet time closing the case when he moved here. I am not sure why they allow women to get away easier than men...but a lot of people are dealing with the same things as your brother is sometimes even worse. I would suggest for him to get a lawyer and see if there isn't any way that she can be forced off as a parent..it might not be the best idea but I do know that there is a law that if a parent has no contact with said child after six months(I believe) that means cards, phone calls, etc they can be signed off as a legal guardian and then maybe your brother can just focus on this child himself without this child having the mother there to interfere and just mess with his mind and in the long run hurt him. I wish your brother the best.....

that's not true,cause Im paying now.and we get the same treatment.

In my opinion, child support not only contains financial support, but also emotional support. I regret to see that the mother does not do her duties for her child. Yes, life is just not so fair. Face to it. You can fight for the child support for your brother, and do not forget to give emothional support for him. I could see that your brother has suffered a lot. Hope that your family will live a happy life.

I agree it is totally and completely horrible that the laws are not enforced when it comes to child support. The sad thing is that I have seen both moms and dads get away with not paying and there be no consequences. You have to fight your ex to get child support awarded and then you have to fight the state to make them pay, the only winner is the person who is not paying. I am sorry that your family is going through this, I know from personal experiance that growing up is hard in situations like this, I wish you all the best.

as far as i know, if you are not legally married, its ok not to give the child support. and it will be your loss for not paying because you will lose your bond with your child. either you are not allowed to see her or even bring her somewhere. coz if you do, the mother can file you kidnapping for it. that is what i heard. though i am not sure if that is true. =X yes you can say its not fair, but that's how the world goes =( we can't do anything about it.