Do you really care this?

@krajibg (11934)
Guwahati, India
May 9, 2009 3:03am CST
That the issue is sensitive and might offend a particular section of myloters and so you keep yourself off responding for the fear that if you responded you would invite their wrath on your head and your ranking could go down drastically. Such people are there here and I have noticed them too. But do you think that only due to fear of change of the star colour you should desist yourself from airing your opinion? Does not this hit your conscience and are not you running away from the truth only to protect your interest and keep the goody goody image intact? Do you really do this? If you do so I say you are not worth discussing with person. No offence please, just curious !!!! Rajib. 09.05.09
10 people like this
21 responses
@mimpi1911 (25474)
• India
11 May 09
Hi Rajib! Nice discussion! I know what you mean. There are a few like that, 'Yes boss', 'No boss' kind. I would like to believe that I do not belong to that category. I have always expressed myself the way I had wanted to. My notions, my beliefs are not salebale to the star color! I have been demoted to yellow red star time and gain and could make out the whos, whys and whens. It feels sad but for the time being and i have learnt to move on and start a new. Recently I have been deducted 2 dollars flat and I didn't bother much. Had it been earlier I would have been very upset for the undefined deduction but now I am smarter. Having said this , it matters but that doesn't mean I would let go my values and integrity. Have a great life!
3 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi Mimpi, The actual thing is that when you speak the true thing it hit the conscience of the people and they react like anything. And that your star colour keep on changing only because of such people. I admire your stance. Thanks a lot.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25474)
• India
12 May 09
You are welcome. I agree with you but i don't think we would change ourselves for others, should we?
• United States
10 May 09
Dear Rajib- I have another section of this thread to respond to, but I thought I'd do my main response first, and then address the other section promptly afterward. I'm sure you're well aware that my star rank does not keep me from responding to issues I feel passionate about, care about, have knowledge on, or are of interest to me personally. When I first began on Mylot it took some getting used to, but I soon realized that the star ranking was really based upon popularity, and not completely upon mutual respect for the individual's ability to write, think critically, and so forth. It's not to say that it cannot be that sort of system, but it is to say that many do not use it as such. I can only go based upon what others have shared with me who have been with Mylot for some time, and that is most people will get to know a user based upon the quality and depth of their writing, and soon the star rank fades into the background. I compare this with perhaps our inability as humans to judge someone based upon merit and not based upon looks. When we all meet someone in person at times it is difficult to just let the person be who they are. We as humans will be attracted to their eyes, their smile, or what have you or even put off by these things with first impressions. It is why as we develop and grow as humans if we focus on letting those impressions go by us like pollen, and take the person wholistically as a seed that we may indeed find the true fruit. I have nothing to protect to be honest, because in the end I own nothing. At least that is a phrase I've come to mull over that my husband uses quite a bit. "Nothing is ours". Namaste-Anora
3 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi Anora, please do not give in to the evil. I cited your name just an example who is with 5 star reputation whereas there are people who are not capable of writing ten good and coherent sentences and they are with 10 star. This is all farce. Even if you go to one I would have the same respect as before and it would not change.
2 people like this
• United States
14 May 09
Rajib- I'm sorry I didn't make it to the other thread I wanted to respond to, I was called away by duties before I got to it. I am definately not giving in, nor will I just because someone else decides they feel the need to inflate their ego by marking my responses in the negative. I know that I very rarely have fights with those on Mylot in a negative fashion. I do stand up for what I believe, but I know I do so in an articulate fashion that does not provide a reason for anyone to mark me negative other than that they disagree with me my stand, which does violate what Mylot states about giving discussions a negative or positive feedback. That said, I will continue to post in areas such as religion and politics as I see things of interest to me, or things that I know something about. No worries about me suddenly fading because of my star rank. Namaste-Anora
@sanuanu (11235)
• India
9 May 09
I don't know if I do it for protecting my stars but I do keep myself away from Religious topic. The main reason is that I dont' know anything about Christian religion and most of the users here start discussion on this one. The political one is a bit interesting to me but sometimes I don't give my opinion because I feel that I can't put my points strongly. I have had discussed this topic with my friends too and the response is quite positive also but still, I don't go for topics for which I feel that I don't have strong points. As for the sake of Stars, everybody loves their star and no one wants it to be going down. So, if anyone is doing it for this reason, s/he isn't wrong in my opinion!
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Hi Sanu, I f you are not strong enough to opine it is a different matter and why can not you put your ideas whatsoever you have on other religion. And about loving the colour of the STAR I feel Anora Eldorath is much better than us. But why is she with a low star?
4 people like this
@sanuanu (11235)
• India
9 May 09
Anora is one of the best writer and one of the strongest user too. I am not that strong. Believe me, I got tears in my eyes when one of the user scolded me for me trying to help her out! So, you need to be strong for that which I think I am not. As for the religion thing, I don't see many people starting discusion on Hindu at all!
4 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi Sanu, who the hell is he who scolded you? Just tell me and I would see his/her fourteen generations.
3 people like this
@ketybhagat (4125)
• India
13 May 09
To me the rating does not matter. What goes up comes down and vice versa. That should not be a detterent to starting discussions that actually need to be discussed rationally and you want a view point of a large section of society. I too started one and boy, did I get some awful bad mouthing answers, but no matter what, I would do it again. I need to know and what bettr platform than the mylot discussions. I would not willing hurt or demean another mylotter, and I would ignore those who use foul language. I may feel a bit if my rating goes down, but that will never put me off starting a discussion where i feel I need to know the views of the world. Just not me.
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
13 May 09
Hi Ketty, I salute your spirit. But wonder at the same time if you are not capable to shoulder the task let it be that of Hercules. And there should not be any whining and pulling legs of the competent ones. This is a platform where all have access to express. If you are keen on your own stuff why do you cast a jealous eye on others. That a star color is no longer a defining post for me as whoever are to know me they do and the new ones would judge from the interaction that I would have with them on the way. Thanks a lot.
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
17 May 09
Hi Ketty, That the use of the pronoun "You" was not to refer you but a universal one. Hence you got mixed up. I know your zeal.. Thanks a lot any way.
1 person likes this
• India
18 May 09
Aw, thats ok. It happens.
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
9 May 09
To tell you honestly I can't stop myself from responding to discussions that are considered controversy and off limits. I have been slapped many times for being vocal in putting up my views which explains why my star remain stagnant for ages. And my posts are no nonsense too as I used to posts sensitive issues only to be met be anger, curse from a handful of close minded people who take matters too personally and forgot that this is a venue for healthy debates. After a while I realized that I have to stop being popular for the wrong reasons and get down to a sober me and now I mellowed down a lot to cater for the peace loving people here. There is no point of getting to the nerves of others and creating a scene here as I'll end up having a raised BP. And that is not good! Now am more relax and see myself doing what my six sense leads me toward. I'll listen to my inner voice and let it guide me. Without being critical or overly emotional, trust in my ability to select what will be a healthy choice of discussions to response.
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Hi zandi, The curse on you is still there. I fret not on the degrading star colour but would not strangle my voice where I feel I should yell or else there are some rotten corner here you better keep off and I have started to know them too. But I would not fully remain off those place. The people out there know zandi' quality, diana's quality, and the quality of those who are not capable of of writing ten coherent sentence but they are with the latter one for her/his always being a 'yes' person. Discussion should be healthy and if there is no debate why are you there where money is too minimum. If I am to post a discussion and all are to come and express their vies in all praise for me, would it be anyway discussion? Fie!!! on such closed mentality. I say drag me to the one star, I would not change my stance.
2 people like this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
9 May 09
This is a true spirit you have, I hope everyone should inculcate this spirit of fearlessness and strength so that mylot remain a strong force in the social networking world. Being weak and self-centered does not prove any good to anyone. Yessing can become so much of a habit that a residual vertical mechanical tic ensues, something like what the spring heads of tiny Japanese dolls do when tapped on the head. I applaud your stand and hope that people are committed to do likewise. It doesn't matter if in the process you do hit below the belt, trample on a friend, or use the kiss of Judas. All's fair when you speak for the truth and your personal point of views. Has the star system any real merit? Nothing. It drove many of the good mylotters/debaters to the exit door of mylot after being demoralized by the sudden slide of their stars. They felt their pride were at stake. So off they go. The star system is open to abuse. To get the best out of people, they must be given the opportunity to use their brains effectively, not someone else's.
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Look this and desire! If this sort of quality writing is with a yellow star yet why the mean minded are here I wonder. Even if it is my enemy but has the quality of a quality person I do say 'salud' and I positive rate. If have the courage come up the front battle field and let us weigh who measures what but do not bite from behind, that is cowardly.
2 people like this
@yoyozhou (356)
• China
9 May 09
Oh,every one has its own opinion. I don't care star colour.I just want to share my feeling and know other's thoughts.It will give me fresh idea!
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
I hope you remain committed to your words. Thanks a lot for responding.
2 people like this
@cannibal (650)
• India
9 May 09
Interesting!! You're right. There are a few such people on myLot. As for me, I'm quite sure that at least so far, I've not been so. (May be because I'm new and haven't obtained any stars or too high rankings; and so not that curious about rankings and stars.) I'd call this a form of hypocrisy. I've also noticed some people who agree with a user on a particular discussion; and make stark contradictory statements from their own in some just to please the starter of the particular discussion or response. All my life, I've hated people who change stands and always try being 'politically correct'. Or in this context should I say 'myLotically correct' (lol) which means a weak and false response which is going to please a large number of myLotters. This also restricts the discussion from being a fruitful one. C'mon, you need to call a spade a spade sometimes! Thankfully, I haven't been one of those people. It's not the excuse I'm putting up for my low rankings and absence of a star; but it does hold truth in a small way!
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Hi Cannibal, you hit on the head of the nail. There are not a few but a huge number who are 'yes, yes' or 'no, no' people just not to on bad book. Thisplreasing all mentality really harms the interest if the discussion and therefore you do not see much of the thread discussion here. Being goody goody does not pay, what pays is your quality. Say for you. You are not yet with any star and when you would get one and if that one is too low my impression on you would not change for I know your worth. I am that sort of person who calls a spade a spade. Thanks for sharing
3 people like this
@coolmailraj (2461)
• India
9 May 09
Hi. I love being considered good and the star color here tells how good you are. But if there is a thing I want to say and feel like discussing on, then I go for it.
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
HI Raj, I too feel one should be of that composure. Thanks for sharing and we need yto keep in mind that we are here to focus our mind and though regardless to any threat.
3 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Well Raj, you are wrong, your star does not tell how good you are. Just tell me how many of us are there as good as Anora Eldorath? The colour of your star does not speak your worth. I have seen worthless people with a blue star too. Be logical and speak forth the truth.
3 people like this
• United States
14 May 09
Rajib- I had planned to answer this as soon as I posted my response, but I was called away by motherly duties. I want you to know just how your words, and that of Sanu's touched my spirit. I cannot express in words how truly touched I am that you both have such a regard for my writings. I feel that I am just me, a humble wife and mother who writes. Thank you so much for such kind words. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
• India
26 May 09
Hello my friend Rajib Ji, Well, barring few concering of earning sites, I am always ready to response. I never worry abour colors or STAR. I understand, it was blue for you sometimes back, which is yellow now. Let's express ourselves without being biased by STAR color. May God bless You and have a great time.[em]thumbup
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
31 May 09
Hello MGBU jee, I know your stance and temperament. You are one who does not hesitate to call a spade a spade. Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• India
31 May 09
Hello my friend Rajib Ji, So nice for your comments. I really appriciate your truthfulness. May god bless YOu and have graet time.
@jazel_juan (15753)
• Philippines
13 May 09
i also do not mind being rated, and i do tell what is on my mind there were times where there are opposing sides and it is just natural, our minds do not think alike
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
13 May 09
Hi jazel, That should be the point of view that if you do not rate you are not forced to but why rate negative and hide your ugly face behind the curtain? Thanks for the response.
1 person likes this
@jazel_juan (15753)
• Philippines
13 May 09
well i do not know about those who rate negatively i never did hehehe
@bamrahkirti (1820)
• India
11 May 09
Yes i know that there are such people in mylot who run after their reputation and ranking and they are not true to themselves.As you have given the example of Anora .She is a great writer with lot of understanding about issues and she is vocal too.Her star ranking does not let her curb her mind to speak against some issues which may be controversial.I think we should be guided by such spirits.It is a platform to discuss,promote and share issues and if we are not faithful to ourselves.
1 person likes this
• India
11 May 09
and to other members then i do not think we are using this platform for right reasons.After all we are not going to get anything by posing like great human beings.Let our mind and heart the their language.
2 people like this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi Bamrahkrti, You have said the bare truth. There are so many people who just to retain their reputation stay off the real discussion. I feel this is a debacle to the real discussion. Thanks a for responding/
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15898)
• Australia
9 May 09
Hi rajib, just today I told a very very rude MyLotter that I thought she was very nasty because of a response she gave to someone and I admit I did consider my reputation before I did it but some things just need to be said and I would not have been true to myself if I didn't react as I saw fit. I have always responded very honestly to all discussions but I admit I have avoided more controversial ones; it really doesn't have anything to do with my star, I am like this in the real world too, I avoid confrontation unless I deem it absolutely necessary but some things not even I can let go. I have had a couple of instances here where I aired my views and others did not agree but fortunately everybody concerned was always intelligent enough not to get nasty and agree to disagree. I think that if you respond with honesty and integrity you are true to yourself and the rating here is not all that important really; it is good for the ego to have a high number star but at the end of the day does it really matter that much? I believe that if you use your manners things are usually OK, for you anyway...Others can react which ever way they like!
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Hi Paula, I do not have anything to say against you. For people have their choice but if a discussion is there and you know you could well place your argument there you should do that. And I know you have never cared for the star thing and even if it is a confrontational but there is logic one should go if one has the point to revive and the receiver too should not feel bad that you did not support him/her. But unfortunately there are many who likes to please people rather than going against the wind.
2 people like this
@paula27661 (15898)
• Australia
9 May 09
I don't have a problem with disagreeing with anyone if I feel strongly enough about the topic and I have done so in the past. I just don't find it necessary to go 'against the wind' just for the sake of it. I don't feel I am here just to please people, I learnt a long time ago that you certainly can't please them all!
1 person likes this
• India
31 May 09
I am not really bothered about my star...I dont know since when I am stuck at 9...maybe even mylot knows I am from commuist west bengal and have stuck me red forever anyway, I seldom go into direct confrontation with people, I usually like to put forward my opinion in a roundabout way so that my saying is there but people dont get offended. Its only in a few discussions that I have been directly aggressive and that also only because the respondents were. But, as I said, I have my sayings and dont beat the bush around about them.
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
31 May 09
Hi Sudipta, I have been having a roll on with my star. From yellow turned red and again from red to yellow and even silver and now again red. Do not know why they do so. Yours being red really suits the communist comrade "Lal Salam" lol. On being direct or indirect depends on the topic of discussion. I have been too direct several times and may be due to that my star color fluctuates.
1 person likes this
@rocker21 (2717)
• India
31 May 09
I hate the Star rating thing on mylot, it even affects when you earn if you got a 10 star you earn more likely faster, Its like its a competition more than expression of feelings, Just coz somebody will get offended you dont speak what actually is in your mind. This sucks badly but what can we do, GOOD= BAD all equal aaite...peace!
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
31 May 09
Hi there, As the is is there we simply can not undo it. Can we? And I am afraid there is any connection in earning when your star is low. This is an ornament only. Thanks for the response.
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21588)
18 May 09
No, I don't hold back for people like that. Quite frankly, if I feel I have something of substance to offer, I'll offer it, come what may. However, there are certain individuals to whom I won't rise when they try to anger me, so they can mark me down. I'll leave the discussion, probably telling them why I'll not be back. Brightest Blessings.
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
31 May 09
Hi there, I appreciate your way as well. When you know that there is no use being vocal against a fellow that understands only his/her things it is far better to leave. Thanks for the response.
1 person likes this
@sandymay48 (2031)
• Canada
17 May 09
Hi Rajib...I am really behind in discussions..I thought I better answer this one or you might think I was hiding so I wouldnt ruin my reputation I do not care at all about the star ratings. I dont even look at them when answering discussions. I also dont care what people think about what I say. I know that sometimes things can be misunderstood on here too so I am carefull how I word things. Everyone in this world is entitled to their opinions which is what a discussion is all about, and none of us were put on this earth to judge others either. So if someone doesnt like what I say, its ok, I never claim to be right anyways
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
17 May 09
Hi Sands, I know you do not care about the star rating but things go ever that way. I too have never said that what I have said or written is the ultimate but if one comes a saviour without the quality of the one and dictates you, probably you would get disturbed a lot and possibility is there that you would revolted at one point. And that is what I wanted to say. thanks anywayss.
1 person likes this
@LittleMel (14036)
• Canada
14 May 09
hahaha star and friends well I don't have many friends in real life so not having friends or not being liked online isn't a big deal to me Quality over quantity, that's all that matters That said I generally try to give my opinion in a good way means unless I'm in a bad mood or I don't like something or someone, I will try to be cool headed and give it the best explanation I can think of and I try not to take sides I don't want to sound know-it-all because I hate people like that myself I don't participate a lot in political and religious discussions I don't like politics and politicians I think they are all fat backstabbers ok some maybe in a good shape because they have the money for it As for religion I don't hate it, I just want to open my mind to what is beyond buildings and books about God that each religion has and some religious discussions are way into books that I don't read much anymore My star used to be 10, no idea why it's 9 now and I couldn't care less I still earn the same on average, my friends are still here even if my star is 1 so why lose sleep over it?
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
31 May 09
Hi LittleMell, Nice wording. People with attitude with know all are kept at arms length. And about star and rating there is nothing one can do. for at the slightest of the cause one might get offended and he/she goes all negative marking spending hours together. I really appreciate your stance on political and religious issues.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 May 09
i have stayed away from answering and posting some things because i knew it may be taken wrong or knew that some one would just start something with it.. i figure sometimes its not worth it because if they misunderstand you you will have your email box flooded and i would feel like i needed to explain everything and if they are just wanting to be jerks you cant explain anything anyways and they will just try to bring you down and insult you. is it right to have to feel like this? no but some times i think you have to pick your battles and i know if i am personally going through a lot of stress it will just add to it and me being stressed out i might lash out and regret it later.. so ugh.. it really just depends on the day and topic lol.. everyone knows im definetely not a goody goody so i am not trying to keep a certain image but one of the hot topics with me that i really get jumped on or irritated with is religion and even on the best circumstances that can get nasty so if i feel i cant be respectful and tactful i try to stay away or wait till i can
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi Moon, I admire your spirit, but I feel there is still something which need bold step to amend them. If you and I do not raise our voice who would come forward? Most of them are mainlining double standards.
1 person likes this
@lazeebee (5466)
• Malaysia
10 May 09
Hi Rajib, it's not so much about protecting my stars or image. I don't like to get involved in controversial and sensitive issues. I can state clearly my views and opinions, and accept others' views as well; however I don't like to be blasted or hassled just because I don't agree with them. So to keep sane and undisturbed, I keep away!
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
12 May 09
Hi, I do not support that one should fight shy of the controversial and disputed issues. Or else for what reason we are there ? Is it to be goody goody fellows or something else. I feel if you have the knowledge and power go ahead and make your presence felt.
1 person likes this
@mentalward (14695)
• United States
9 May 09
I'm a VERY easy going, laid back person. My mind is open to all opinions and I have very few things that I am adamant about. I will express my opinion but, if it is regarding a controversial subject, I will never fail to mention that it is ONLY my opinion, not a fact. Some sensitive topics discussed in myLot are SO heated that I naturally avoid them because I don't like getting caught up in an angry debate. I don't believe that anything can be resolved with anger, so I refuse to get wrapped up in it. MyLot is a place with such a variety of topics that we're able to pick and choose those we wish to respond to. My life has been so hectic and crazy that I like to become involved in the lighter topics, often funny topics. Life is too short to be angry, especially over words on a computer screen! I don't care about my "image". I am who I am and if you like me, great. If not, so what?
@krajibg (11934)
• Guwahati, India
9 May 09
Hi mentalward, I could not help appreciating your view as you do not care you image and do not wish to poke nose in the unnecessary debates. I too am of that sort but when things come to my point I do not care who has said what and would call a spade a spade, you like it or not that remains to you. But there is truth too that life is too short to shoe our anger and bitterness. Thanks pal.
1 person likes this