after marriage, you will let your wife or husband keep theirs old friends?
By icesmile
@icesmile (7160)
Romania
7 responses
@angelsmummy (1696)
•
16 Jun 09
You know what friends your husband/wife has when you marry them therefore if you are going to stop them seeing their friends then theres no point in getting married in the first place. When you are in a relationship you try to make the other person happy over yourself not yourself happy over them. If you cant accept that then dont get married. Simples :D:D
@icesmile (7160)
• Romania
16 Jun 09
If i understand well, you say that you will married just because wnat to make he or she happy. But you can make happy all people, not one in special.
If i will marry again, i will marry just because i want to be happy, and if i am happy, of course that i am happy just because i love my mate. And if i love him, of course that i will make all for his happiness. But i can t make him happy, if i am not happy...sorry, but i was in a marriage where i was unhappy, and i never can to make him happy...i have some experience in this.
1 person likes this
@angelsmummy (1696)
•
16 Jun 09
I dont mean make them happy by making yourself unhappy but you do try making them happy. I am in love and I am not happy unless my partner is happy. I would not be with him if I didnt approve of his friends. Theres a couple of my friends he doesnt like but they still come round and I still go to see them. You give and take in a relationship
2 people like this
@incredibleDNA (1742)
• Philippines
24 Jun 09
yes, i'm honest with my answer. I will still let my man keep his old friends as long as he still enjoys their company. I will not be selfish with my man's attention as a person can grow better if he will continue to mingle with old friends and new friends as well.
1 person likes this
@cobrateacher (8432)
• United States
16 Jun 09
Hi, Ice!
My husband and I grew up together, so we have pretty much the same friends. I can't imagine either of us not letting the other spend time with a friend if we weren't fond of them, though. In fact, he has a nephew I absolutely can not stand, but the guy's part of the package, so to speak. While we enjoy socializing, we want our time at home and quiet, after he is able to return home. We've outgrown the clubs and parties of our younger years, and the friends who were just part of that.
1 person likes this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
31 Aug 09
Hi icesmile, I have to totally disagree with you here as you make it sound that spouses must only tolerate each others friends. People who live too much in one anothers pockets are not in a healthy relationship to be jealous of the time a spouse shares with another and I couldn't conceive of being in a relationship with someone who showed anger at independant behaviour by the other person.
@clutterbug (1051)
• United States
16 Jun 09
When I got married I wrote to my meaningless boyfriends and said "good-bye" to them. My husband did the same with his old girlfriends. I didn't want to have my hubby jealous in any way, and he didn't want me jealous either. We are both extremely happy with our new set of friends who are married couples. Sometimes it is time to let go of the past and move on to more mature friendships. We've been happily married for 20 years.
@Martinishakerer (61)
• United States
16 Jun 09
I really think if you are marrying your significan other, you have to take what comes with them. This includes their friends/family. I'm sure if you don't like one of their friends, there is someone you are friends with that they don't like either.
@danishcanadian (28953)
• Canada
27 Aug 09
My husband and I have the same type of friends. We like the same type of people. We have some mutual friends that we both knew before we knew eachother, and we have our own friends. We like the other person's friends very much, and are OK with us having separate friends as well as mutual friends.
