Single parents of children with Autism and dating...
June 17, 2009 9:37pm CST
A couple of months ago, I reconnected with an old friend and we really CONNECTED. In a way we hadn't before. A serious relationship developed, we met and spent time with one anothers children... and then there were a few issues. My son has Autism, his doesn't, but they're close in age (a little less than a year apart -- my son is younger). Shortly after we started dating, my son started to get very aggressive in school after many months of zero or minimal aggression. He was also getting more aggressive at home. I understand this, I know where this is coming from. Someone new has been introduced, and while my son really does like this man (he frequently asks if we can go see him, to the point of getting ready to go out on his own and practically dragging me out the door to head over there), he hasn't had to share my attention with anyone for over 2 years. It's an adjustment, and I understand that. My son and my boyfriends son were getting along, but not really playing together. Occasionally, his son would get too close or otherwise unknowingly provoke my son and he would get aggressive with him. These two had only ever spent time together at my boyfriends house... where his son has many toys and my son only has whatever he brings over that day. It was a little frustrating. The aggression seems to be winding back down. My son seems comfortable with sharing my attention. We also had a nice little breakthrough 2 weeks ago. When the toy factor was essentially eliminated... the boys started to play together and really enjoyed it. They laughed and chased each other and yelled and did all the things little boys do. It was awesome. Since then, I've had no reports of aggression in school, I've seen no aggression at home. Single parents of children with Autism... it's hard when you start to date again. I know what you're going through. But it there's a bright light at the end of the tunnel you've got to travel through. Don't despair and give up hope. Anyone else got a story to share on the subject?
29 Aug 09
I dont have a very similar story, but ur post really hit home for me. I am a single mum to a 5 yr old boy, who has been diagnosed with ASD. I am seeing a guy but its not mega serious. The thing that scares me is that eventually I will want to introduce someone new into my sons life and I wonder how he would deal with it. it gave me a real boost to read ur post as the other thing that crossed my mind (and I felt real selfish at thinking this) was that it would be real hard to find a man that would take on a child with problems. I feel a little more hopeful, thankyou x