Should she break him up or give him a chance?

This is one of the reasons why I don't believe in long-distance relationships. He doesn't deserve her trust - he lost it once, I don't think that she should give him another chance. Like you said - who's to say that he will not do it again when they get married? I think your friend should talk to her fiance and tell him that she's seriously considering leaving him because of what he did. I don't really know what kind of reassurance would be "enough" in a case like this, since he can't really take "leave" to go back to the Philippines (right?) and have a decent and serious conversation with her about their future.

You know what, regardless how you 'advice' your friend, it boils down to one thing, she will have to decide on her own with this one. You could comfort her, give her everything you could, but she's the one facing this dilemma. You could give her your thoughts on the matter, we could accumulate all our ideas as well but it's going to be her and her alone who'll have to deal with the feeling at night when she's about to sleep. I know how she truly feels. It's not something to be taken so lightly. What I could tell her right now, if she's my friend, is to tell her to just let go of the hurt and doubt. I'm not telling her to leave him or to let go of the love, but I'm telling her that pondering too much on something like this wouldn't really do her good anyway. Let her find herself, and let the guy decide for them. If he decides to let their relationship go on, he will pursue her and show her she need not worry about it, otherwise, he will give up eventually. But regardless what he does, let her remember her worth. Let her cry and just be a child in pain but remind her that having him or letting him go won't stop the world from revolving. If she did and feel that she has done everything she can to work for the relationship, then she should not have any regrets whatsoever if he decides to be a j*rk. Let him decide. If he really wants to marry her he will do everything to marry her. If he decides otherwise, the relationship will just dwindle. Let your friend stand in her two feet. Perhaps this incident is a blessing in disguise, we might not understand it now, but eventually she'll see. Good luck to you and your friend. Tell her keep praying for wisdom and understanding.

This sort of thing is not surprising with a long distance relationship, if she really loves him and would like to giv him another chance I say go for it, and maybe she can go visit him sometimes, like a surprise maybe meet his coworkers and all the people around him and get a better feeling of the kind of environment that he is in, and to see for herslf if there is a lot of temptation in his way, becuase if after just months he is already straying.

Long distance relationships can be challenging for that exact reason. There has to be a hug amount of trust, and without that the relationship wont be able to progress. There are several options you friend could take, but she has to think about them carefully. She could break up with him now, to let him know he has done something very wrong. If he is serious about her, he will try to make it up to her, if not he isnt worth it. She could give him this one chance, but if he messes up again she must end it otherwise he might just get the idea he can do it and get away with it. There is no point her saying "I dont want you to see her again" because she will have no way of knowing if he is still speaking to her, and also if they live near each other and work together then that would be impossible. If she thinks he has enough comitment otherwise then it might be worth continuing with the relationship. Have they made plans for the wedding, set the date and things? If not maybe she should say "I will give you a second chance, but i want to delay the wedding" so she has extra time to regain trust in him while he is back home. Best thing you can do is just be there to support her, and comfort her no matter what desicion she makes! I hope she manages to make a good decision, and hope things work out for her! I wish her good luck!

what ever her heart tells her is what she should do. we can always give advice but it is up to them to consider it and do it. if she believes that she can leave him and do fine or better without him then she should do it. he already broke the trust issue between them. its hard to stay with someone or stil have trust and faith that they will not do it again. she will always have it in her mind and heart. will he do it again? will she be able to cope with it the trust issue? if she can live with it then she should stay with him otherwise dump the man he is not worth it. no one that has hurt your feelings is worth your tears. tell her to move on if she can she wil only keep having problems with him in the long run. it is hard to have a relationship so far away and especially witha booty cal next door to him. hope i was able to help you out. maria

Well, if i was the guy and didn't love the women of my dreams, would i take money out my very own paycheck and give it a random person? No, of course I wouldn't. I'm sure the boyfriend deserves another chance. And there can't be any positive truth about the boyfriend cheating on her. I'm sure he really loves your friend, distant relations with others happen all the time, at work school, bars =P, well the point is, you make friends wherever you occasionally go, this probably is just an average co-worker.

Once cheating on means always cheating. But may be he will cut down his play boy activities after marriage. But your friend needs to ascertain whether he is really in love with her. If in reality he considers your friend as a time pass, then just go away from him instantly that is better for her.

I think that its a little shallow on his part since he has been gone only six months.I wouldnt advise you to tell what to do because as friends its never our place to tell each other what to do relationship wise.Friends likes our advice only to help them through tough time.You will see my reason in next discussion.They should talk it over if she truly loves him.Tell him how she feels and what she wants from him.Honestly he maybe just having a fling considering they are far apart.Its up to her to decide how much he means to her.

My friend I think her boy friend really loves her, because he went to abroad to give her a better life. He send her some money every month from his saving. You can observe that he really care about her. It he wanted to ditch her he could have done it when he went to abroad. He really wanted to marry her, because every month he remember that some one is waiting for him. I say your friend must give him another chance.

Just be there coz your friend needed you but you dont have to take part on the decision making , it has to be her own free will to do that .... no matter how hard we tell our friends what to do and not to do still they will still have to decide and do things there way.... Just show her the right path and in some ways she we see the path to be a clear one for now just be there for her for she is still in a lot of pain and would need a friend near by....

probably she should investigate the whole matter and then decide. Either hire a professional or go see the situation herself - i know it is going to be slightly expensive but its better than taking the risk after tying the knot! Probably they should have a heart to heart talk and then decide on what is expected of each other. If either of them is not really interested in compromising then the relationship should be better broken than regretting later when things are irreparable!

to be cheated on is a really difficult thing to experience because once trust is broken, it is really difficult to put it all back together. her decision is entirely her own but she should also give the man a chance to explain himself once they are face to face but in this case it would be difficult because she would still have to wait a very long time before he comes back. now, to wait for him or not is also her decision. this is a much more difficult situation to be in because the man is in a different country. how can you know if he's true to his words or he'll just do it again? chances are, you won't. this is where trust comes in(again). this applies to all and not just long distance relationship. just tell her to think things over. if she has to take some time off, she can. what i can suggest is that for her to take some time off and think everything over. if the man can explain to her clearly why it happened, then it helps. usually, men cheat just for the thrill of it. if he sounds remorseful of what he did then it might be true. if a woman is cheated on, it will always be in the back of her mind and it will always come up whoever man she's with. but it is her decision alone if she is willing to reestablish that trust and give him a chance.

We are born with love and will die in love. From the above it can be seen that your friend loves his boyfriend and he too loves your friend , thats y they also want to get married....and the boy went abroad to earn and to save for there future.Your friend shud first of all consider herself as the luckiest of all bcoz her friend thinks of their future and wants to make it more colourful.........And now she is envolved with a new girl there,may b it can be bcoz of the atmosphere prevailing over there,or tympass according to him.Say her to talk him once and clear all her doubts,bcoz if doubts remain,they can make the situation more worse,they shud talk and clear each and every thing between them.....

I think your friend must give his boyfriend a second chance. We're just human right? And were not totally perfect.As your friends boyfriend said its just a past time. Then be it. Long distance relationship is very difficult to live for both of them especially he is a guy.If your friend really love his boyfriend then fight for it. Actually I also have friends with the same situation as your friend and their relationship now is still going strong.Their problem is just a little test for them if they can survive it.

Hello, for long distance relationship is hard and especially once he cheated already. well, like old saying said "Once a cheat is still a cheater."... I married to my husband for 6 years now and have 2 children together... but before I married, he was far away from me and he always contacted me everyday but still, he cheated on me. I found out and it hurt so bad and I just tried and tried again to let go of him but I couldn't cuz I still love him. However, I gave him a chance but it has to be stop and that's it... If I find out another time, then it would be over... for now, he never done it again but who know u know... Guys are the same thing, once they away then they try and try to flirt. They thought it is ok but it is not ok. For this situation, you should let her decides herself cuz this is a big step. If the guy is very honest and this is the first time then she should forgive him but give him all the trust she has so that mean he would believe her... another thing, try to give him all the love he needs so he feels like only her be the ONE. hope thing get better

Alas ! Trust once broken is so hard to build again... And its much much more difficult, tending to impossible when the trust is in case of love ! I really don't think your friend should forgive him. For she can control herself in his absence then he should too. And if he would have regretted it a lot then there's a chance of her thinking. But he said so casually (thats what your discussion says). So I really think that there's a fat chance of him repeating it again. And if they are committed into marriage at that time, its gonna be very difficult. The decision is all hers...

The important in a relationship is respect, love, and fidelity. I think on that occasion. Your friend must be reasonable enough. Ask his boyfriend to say justified reason why he does things that he knows pain to her girl friend. It is unbelievable that his boyfriend doing things for play on that girl. Isn't that hurt for a girl heard that some men played girls. His boyfriend is not faithful to her. It is better to go away with that guy before things worst than she expected. How if there is something happen that women in his boyfriend and the one getting pregnant. Did you think that he is mistaken in doing that? If your friends, feeling that he loves most that guy. She should decide now and analyze what is really the best things to do if she stay or away...Just give time first to see the wrong side and the good side on that relationship.

hi check,its really difficult to give advise sometimes when we know we would hurt thier feelings.but if i were you,i will tell my friend not to judge her boyfriend that quick and decide easily.sometimes,when wer'e very much hurting inside,we decide so quick that we dont think if that decision is good or bad.your friend should wait till her boyfriend go home and they should talk about the matter.if your friend find out that what his boyfriend did is not that serious,then its forgivable,sometimes it really depends on the situation.but if your friend think that its a serious mistake that he commits,then maybe she can let go of him.if her boyfriend really shows that he trully love your friend and sincere to her,love always finds a way and forgiveness always has a place between them...hope this will help you sum up some ideas :) good day!

wow thats not right for him to do that i think she should leave him and find someone better that like thaey say there is lots of fish in the sea and i know she can do better find someone tha will respect, treat her good and dont make her cry thats my opinion. the other good thing is that she has a friend like u check23 that is there to give her advice when she needs it and a shoulder to cry on hope my opinion help a little or a lot hopefully good luck with this situation.........

if i was the girl ill probably dump him! i mean you got no time in one life to waste on a guy who cheat on you. life is too short , dump him and find the rigth person for you , i mean theres someone somewhere that he waiting just for your friend . tell her just lets the time decide this situation . this is what i did whit my girlfriend , i took a break and now its working like a charm and the only thing i did was taking my time and think about it and she did the same from her side and now everything is ok.