I need some help about babyshower please!!!

@mermaidivy (15404)
United States
June 29, 2009 12:32pm CST
My question is is it necessary to go to babyshower? My husband's brother's wife is going to give birth, babyshower will be on August. The situation is I only have been together with my husband for less than a year, have seen his family less than 5 times, I'm not close to anybody in his family. But lately I received a babyshower invitation card and it is only for girls which means my hubby won't go, so I don't want to go without my hubby... and all I know is I'm gonna bring the present and sit there for nothing... I want to ask if it is a MUST to go? Do I NEED to go? Please share your opions!!
1 person likes this
8 responses
@dlr297 (5416)
• United States
30 Jun 09
This might be a good opportunity for you to get to know some of your husbands family.If it were me i would go and try to get through it the best i could. and if it got to uncomfortable for me. i would just make a excuse that i had to leave early. If you do not go i think that it would be a good idea to get a small gift only because it is for your husbands brother's new child.
1 person likes this
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
1 Jul 09
hmmm so I should but I could make an excuse to leave early?...
@gr8life (6252)
• Malaysia
7 Jul 09
Hello mermaidivy, It is not a must for you to go but since it is your brother-in-law's wife, I think it is polite if you join the baby shower. I understand how awkward it is if you have to go without your husband since you're not that close to them, but it is better to go rather than not going. They might think that you don't like to be around your husband's family. Just treat them as you treat your own family since once you married your husband, his family means yours too
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
8 Jul 09
Thank you for your comment :-)
1 person likes this
@jesssp (2739)
• Canada
6 Jul 09
I think it would be nice for you to go but you are in no way obligated to if it makes you uncomfortable. By inviting you they (your husband's family) are making an effort to include you and that's very nice of them, it shows that they consider you family. It would be good of you to go to the shower and try to get to know these ladies a little - after all, some of them are your family now and they will always be part of your life. If it really makes you uncomfortable then stopping by briefly to drop off a small gift would also be a nice gesture. The more you attend these family gatherings the more comfortable you will be around them so even if it's awkward at the beginning it is definitely worth it to make the effort now.
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
8 Jul 09
I would just like to give gift and greet and go... I don't know, I'm still thinking about it. Thank you for your suggestions though :-)
@deejean06 (1953)
• United States
6 Jul 09
Hi mermaid...I think you have to go since it is your family now too and I think there will be bad feelings if you don't. If you lived far away that would be a different story but if you live close by I think you should attend. Just think of it as a couple of hours out of your life - it's not much. Good luck to you!
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
8 Jul 09
I'm still thinking about it... don't really wanna though...
@kprofgames (3099)
• United States
1 Jul 09
I think it's common practice to invite all the family for babyshowers. As far is it neccessary to go, that is really up to you. You stated that you've only seen his family less then 5 times in the year you've been married. Is this because his family isn't really close? or just because of location or maybe they just can't stand each other. Families are a funny thing, but the answer is no, you don't have to go if you don't want too. You could look at this as an oppertunity to get to know his side of the family better though.
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
2 Jul 09
I have been to their family parties before and I was like a stranger sitting in the house... that's how I felt; I don't think they particularly care for me, I'm the only Asian in their family and I don't know if they like me really... I would just prefer going with my hubby if he could but it is just a girl thing... so I don't think I will go. Thank you for your comment!
@rainmark (4302)
1 Jul 09
For me if tha situation is like that. I would not be bothered to go,just send them a prezzies and formal reason why you're not able to come for the babyshower party. I don't want to be out of place when they were chatting.
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
2 Jul 09
That's wha tI thought too, give them an excuse, still give them gifts but not going. Thank you for your suggestion :-)
@clutterbug (1051)
• United States
29 Jun 09
I never felt obligated to go to babyshowers, and I didn't go to a few that I was invited to. It's not necessary to go to them. I don't like to go to wedding showers either, with or without my hubby. To me they are boring and a waste of time.
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
29 Jun 09
Boring and waste of money is right... I don't have such traditional thing at home like this, like begging for stuff for their own thing... I don't particularly care for it...
• United States
29 Jun 09
The necessity of going is specific to families and individual. If you think that by going you will end up in big issue then avoid it with a smart reason. On the other hand, if it is must for all the women in family then to avoid bigger issue and future comments you should go. If you have to go then just to set the condition talk with somebody on phone and promise to talk more during this babyshower.
@mermaidivy (15404)
• United States
29 Jun 09
Thanks for your suggestion..