July 11, 2009 2:10pm CST
I'm annoyed at my man how come he can say and joke about whatever he wants but a soon as I say something about it I'm wrong?? God that's annoying.....he also refuses to clean up his dogs poop. If I throw something at him in a playful manner he chucks it at me, how messed up is that. Oh and our daughters first word is dada and he wouldn't even turn off his game system to hear it. Care to rant with me??
13 Jul 09
Hi! I hope I can help you in a way. First, let us sort it out before you get frustrated with the man in your life. Generally, men who jokes a lot are sensitive. They joke about things that either upset them or things that they cannot say straight forwardly. In other words, men who jokes a lot cannot be joked on because they will feel upset. They will feel you are hurting them in a way. If you think it is unfair, yes, definitely it is. This characteristic of him should have been known to you before you get married. However, becuase it is not, you have to find a way to work it out with him. With regards to him messing your home, men are naturally unneat in many ways. Socks, magazines, t-shirts and anything else he uses, you can definitely see on the floor and everywhere. Best thing to deal with your issues will be to talk to him. Do not talk to him in an annoyed way. Find a way to relax, clear your mind, before you say a word, make sure that you are relaxed and will not shout or anything. Look at the issue from his perspective as you discuss the things that hurts your feelings. He probably does not understand why you are upset about things, he does not think that you are being annoyed about his ways. Thus, it is necessary that you tell him how you feel when he does things, especially his supposed neglect of your child. Women are sensitive in many ways and sometimes men do not understand us until we tell them. If after you talk to him, he does not change, maybe it is his nature. But if he loves you as much as you love him, he will definitely change. Not every thing that annoys you will change but at least some of it like giving time to your child and may be cleaning up his pets poop. Relax, men can really be annoying but just the same, they can be lovable at times.
• United States
13 Jul 09
Thank you for your response me and him had a talk the other night but all of the things I said in this post are most likely not going to change ever. Dog poop is never going to be picked up by him he refuses. Got any advise on how to stop his gas? And short temper?
14 Jul 09
I am glad that you already talked but then, it seems that I am right, while he knows you are being annoyed he is not bound to change. Men have different ways to handle stress and frustrations and this often leads to being short tempered at times. The best thing to do is to look at what is causing him to be angry or unreasonable, does he may have problems, issues or just darn busy gaming. If he does not want to be bothered, let him be. In the same token, when you are busy and he jokes on you, ignore him. Yes, sometimes you just have to stand firm on your thoughts. If he does not realize his shortcomings, you should awaken him. Just do not resort in fighting becuase of small issues. If he jokes and you got hurt, tell him so. Communicating is always the best way to handle marital issues. If it is his nature that he is short tempered, it is something that you have to discuss with him when you have the chance. Talking about it will make him realize his faults, he cannot blame you if he does not change and in the future you decide that things aren't working right. Just learn how to read him and talk to him when you have the chance. I know I am becoming repetitive but my goal is for you to understand that you have to see things from a different perspective than yours. In the same token, I am not telling you to be take everything. If you feel that things aren't working right, you have to decide if keeping the marriage is being healthy for you and your kid. Sometimes, even if we love the man in our life, if they are not cooperating, things will never work out fine. Constant fighting or disagreements may not be healthy for your kid, you have to think of the future.
12 Jul 09
Yea, that isn't mutual grounds. If he can joke with you, you should be able to joke with him. If I were you I would tell him how you felt, teach him some responsibility, clean up your mess, and throw out his gaming system lol. Anyone who has a child should be spending very little time embedded in the world of ps3/xbox whatever. It's time to grow up and focus on your child's growing up and having a loving family.