do you and your child follow the rules, when you/they join a group or committe..

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I am in charge of a particular youth group, a group that requires a committment(not your standard youth group), and when a newcomer joins, we give them and their parents the rules and guidlines during their first meeting. After seeing the rules, they have the option of not joining if they don't believe they can't follow them or commit to the group...no hard feelings. Their personal life can sometimes be hectic, and we understand that our youth groups are not for everyone. However, most kids and their parents seem to always feel they can handle it. BOY,how fast things change a month or two down the road...the kids come in late (when they should be there 15 minutes before), their attire is often against the rules, and when they can't make it, we never receive a telephone call in advance to let us know, they will not be attending. While it frustrates me, I don't often blame the children, because I believe the parents should be teaching them what responsibility is all about. The parents have to drive them, so obviously it is the child's fault that they are late, and the parents obviously are not looking at what the child is wearing. How can children learn if they are not guided properly by their parents. When the same child becomes a teenager, I often feel that they should now have learned to be responsible in some way, and no longer feel that it is entirely the parents fault. However, if they had no guidance from their parents, how will the child ever learn. As adults...have YOU joined an adult group, and have trouble following thru with your committment to that group. For example, I used to belong to an adult choir...every Wednesday evening was practice night. I was amazed to see those that had no problem staying home that night, but still expected to sing the following weekend. Don't they realize that we need everyone together when they are learning a song, that their voice and participation is important to all of us. These are just a few examples of what I have experienced...parents not teaching their child what "Committment" is about, or responsibility, because they themselves don't know what it is. Have you witnessed this yourselves.