sos

By eM
@eLsMarie (4347)
Philippines
July 30, 2009 12:00pm CST
hello mylotters! i'm turning 20 this October... my problem is i have a boyfriend, unfortunately, my parents weren't aware about it... he's not the first guy whom i loved, i have 4 former boyfriends... i wanted to introduce my current boyfriend but i'm afraid that they'll reject him and they'll be disappointed about me... :( what should i do? should i inform them? should i continue the relationship secretly? :( SOS!
2 people like this
14 responses
@_sketch_ (5705)
• United States
31 Jul 09
Well why do you think that they will reject him and be disappointed in you?? Is he not a good boyfriend?
1 person likes this
@eLsMarie (4347)
• Philippines
31 Jul 09
well he is a good one... he's 20 years of age... he is a fresh graduate... he is currently working in a fastfood chain and by next year he'll be leaving...
1 person likes this
@_sketch_ (5705)
• United States
31 Jul 09
Well If I introduced my parents to someone like that I think that they would be quite impressed, not disappointed.
@jayrene (2712)
• Philippines
30 Jul 09
you are already 20, are you still studying? i know here in our country some parents dont really like their children to have any serious relationship with anyone if they are still studying as they are concerned that if it happens their studies will suffer. you could try giving them a hint, 'palipad hangin' about having a suitor. if it by their reaction it sounds ok, then you can introduce your boyfriend to them on your birthday. but if not, you can invite your boyfriend on your birthday at home and introduce him to your parents, so they can see the guy. i dont know how strict your parents are but i could try telling them that he is my friend first, then later on tell them that he is my boyfriend. and i dont know how ok it is to your bf if you introduced him as 'friend' only to your family as some of the guys dont like that and would say you dont love them enough to fight for them.
1 person likes this
@eLsMarie (4347)
• Philippines
31 Jul 09
yes i'm still studying... my mom promised me that when i reached the age of eighteen i'm already allowed to have a boyfriend but i don't know what's the reason behind why she changes her mind... :(
1 person likes this
@croamer (165)
• Taiwan
31 Jul 09
it depends how much you love him, how long you've been together, and how much you sure the guy is the one you are looking for as the rest of your life? If the answers of those questions are 'Yes, 100%', don't be afraid, speak out let your parents know him. another question, who's more important, you boyfriend or your parent? think about it.
1 person likes this
• Belgium
31 Jul 09
Your parents have much more exprience of life than you. Why not let them know and ask their advice if he is worse to get along with or not. Anyway, whether you accept their advice or not still depend on yourself.
1 person likes this
• India
31 Jul 09
I really don’t know why they should reject your present bf or be disappointed by you…you are only 20 and very young and this is the time for your to enjoy life. So its obvious that you would have many bfs right now…broach the subject to them and I am sure on your birthday, they would not be angry with you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
31 Jul 09
So, you have a boyfriend, huh? well, it's ok. if you hide it from your parents, but sooner or later they will get suspicious and they might find out. that would be even more disappointing. it would be best to introduce them to your parents so that i will spare you the trouble of getting caught.
1 person likes this
@mel13088 (265)
• United States
31 Jul 09
Its hard to say what I would do in this situation. I have always been honest with my parents and told them when I had a relationship with a guy. I don't know how your parents will accept you having a boyfriend. Make sure your parents know who your boyfriend really is and that he is not putting on an act. If you introduce them in a relaxed situation it might go really well. I would introduce them before the birthday and then bring him to the birthday if I was still with him. Good luck and I hope your parents like your boyfriend!
1 person likes this
@cwong77 (2011)
• Malaysia
31 Jul 09
Why do you have to feel that way? It is very common for someone to be in love... I think it is a good thing to let your family members enjoy the happiness that you are being love.. If they rejected it, it sure for a reason.. maybe the earlier you find that out, the better you are.. I am serious, sometimes when we are in love, we go blind, we need the elders to help us in identifying the best person.. Go ahead, let them know you are in love..
1 person likes this
@x_Jo_x (1041)
30 Jul 09
Hmmm, i dont think you should worry too much what your parents say. I know obviously you want them to like him. But as long as he treats you right, and you love him then its ultimatly your desicion. I think if you really like him then you should introduce him. Or maybe introduce him as a friend? Invite him round with one or 2 other friends that your parents already know, that way they will spend more time talking to him. There will be no presure on him to be your boyfriend and be nervous because they wont know and it gives them a chance to get to know him before they find out he is your boyfriend. That way if they like him, you can then say "We are bf and gf now" and if they dont then you can just keep it secret!
1 person likes this
@Theresaaiza (10528)
• Australia
9 Sep 09
Im 25 Im not allowed to have BF Because of my BF my family went crazy I was promised that its ok after studies.......but THEY CHANGED THEIR MIND! Nice life, huh?
• Philippines
31 Jul 09
20 yrs old is mature enough to handle this kind of relationship and i believe you are well aware of what are the consequences of being committed to someone especially if you are still studying as most of the parents prefer their children to concentrate more on studies before anything else. The best thing that you do is prove to your parents that you do excel in your studies so that when you introduce later on your boyfriend to them, they might have the impression that you are responsible with your studies even if you have boyfriend.
• United States
31 Jul 09
I think you should tell your parents. They will still love you no matter what, and your mom did promise that you could start dating at eighteen. Good luck!
@grace118224 (1040)
• China
31 Jul 09
i think if you are ready to marry him and then you should introduce him to your parents . Why you think your parents will reject him because you are too small to have boyfriends ? Or your parents think you have got too many boyfriends ? Yeah parents always worry about daughters being cheated in their love life .
• India
30 Jul 09
i guess philiphines is some what conservative n strict wen it comes to relationships..i might be wrong even.but ur scared words say that ur parents deffo are strict.anyhow it doesnot really matter until ur selection is proper.if u are damn sure that guy isn levin u,then its better u open it out to ur parents.get him introduced to ur parents and observe ur parents impression for him.once u are done wid observation,if its negative den make a choice ,else not a problem at all