I wrote a Gospel song- please tell me if its GOOD

India
August 19, 2009 6:21am CST
hi everyone. I have always been telling that my writing skills are bad. im a music lover. i thought of writing about God and my life. i wrote a verse and a chorus and my brother composed the tune. it has come out pretty well. however i m not all that confident this being my first song. so i would like to get your feedbacks. this is about a confession song. its not an hyms, its something like worship song. please guide me through.. and encourage me to write more songs. thanks here i am to confess i come close to you with a broken heart i bow before you with great sense of guilt i never felt so low with much hurt and regret i want to reach out to you with my open heart chorus: here i am, to confess my sins and i know, you are my deliverer here i come, to give you my heart Lord, you take my heart and make me whole. lord you take my heart and make me whole. i just recorded this song roughly, but there is no option here to post mp3's. we are trying to add more lyrics to it.. once i get the feedback as it will help me to improvise. thanks a lot
2 people like this
7 responses
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
19 Aug 09
looks good, but it's too short. most songs you want v verse verse chours verse verse chours again but i hope you got it copyrighted so no one can steal it. i'm a songwriter as well, and i have a consulting business.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
hi.. i should add so much to it. like a bridge ot pre chorus. i m just a beginner, it would be nice if i get help.. you are a songwriter? wow. interesting! what kind of music you write? please let me know
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
no i havent got it copywrighted yet. i have no clue about it
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Aug 09
i would add like some more verses, and maybe either a bridge or a tag at the end. here's my web site http://scottmmaddensr.yolasite.com/ i write like country, i got a jazz and a r&B song too. but make sure you get it copyright, if you are in the states i can give you the site where you need to get the forms at. if you're in another country i'm not sure how it works in other countries. but i would like to hear your song, if you want email it to me at mrmusicmanco@aol.com
1 person likes this
@skye86 (57)
• India
19 Aug 09
This is good. I would love to hear the tune because I think if you have the right music it will be a good song. You're not that bad Cheer up!
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
i can send it to your personal id. that is the only way u can listen to it.
1 person likes this
@skye86 (57)
• India
19 Aug 09
that will be good but don't know how I can share my id with you.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
i sent you a request, you add me, and pm me your id.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
19 Aug 09
Absolutely nice Andre... I can see a song writing career for you! I most certainly would love to hear the song. I do agree that you could add another verse and bridge but its good. Use the psalms too as a boost to your worship songs. But otherwise its all good to me. Well done
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
hey thanks a lot, i will definitely take references from psalms for the bridge. i wil send all my friends a copy of the song once it is complete. i hope i hav a career in music. please pray for me,thanks
1 person likes this
@med889 (5941)
19 Aug 09
This is simply wonderful as you got the talent to atleast write something, I would love to hear you sing that though with the music and fine tune, I wonder how beautiful it will be as it is already very good now. Keep it up.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
i thank you very much. one day will record with music. i have only recorded without music.
1 person likes this
@levite (1062)
• Philippines
21 Aug 09
Your song is pretty good. I think if that song is inspired to you by God then it is beautiful upon His sight. I'm also not so good in writing Gospel songs. I am trying but sometimes there are no words that come into my mind. I think we need to have more inspirations to write more Gospel songs.
1 person likes this
@janice5 (21)
• United States
19 Aug 09
i personally think its great you have more than a start. i myself is a music lover but i wish so much that i could sing or even come as close as to writing a song like yours but i would sound major crappy and nothing would seems to come together like a song. so trust me your lyrics are great.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Aug 09
hi janice, thanks so much. i thought the same way.. but just make an attempt.. you can do so well. just give it a try atleast lyrically. good luck
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Aug 09
wow two thumbs up for that one.. i am pretty sure it's going to be lovely once you get the chanve to sing it force us live, kidding. am not sure what to change since am no composer here..lovely gospel song
1 person likes this