are or were you strict with your child or children and do make excuses for them

United States
August 28, 2009 9:29am CST
when my kids was growing up i was very strict with them. they had to do what i ask and when i ask them to do things. they weren't allow to talk back to any adults for any reasons. if they miss school they couldn't watch tv or go outside. if they miss on a friday there went the whole weekend for them my mother in law used to tell i was to strict on them, now she is like she is glad i was. my two kids never been in trouble with the law, never did drugs, drink or got mix up with gangs. they knew they would have gotten a whipping if they did and i know some parents today they will make excuses for their kids wrong behavors. like my neice who's in her 20's cruiss me and my wife out and my brother was like well she do have a bad mouth. yeah it need to be smack too. are you strict with your kids, and do make excuses up for them when they do wrong no matter how old they are
3 people like this
9 responses
@sweetyethot (1737)
• China
29 Aug 09
Hi,I have no kids now.But I believe I will be strict with them as what you did once I have a child.That will do them good.
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
29 Aug 09
I'm pretty strict. I also have rules that must be followed or they are punished. I find that taking things away from oldest is of the best result..lol..There are a lot of things she loves to do like computer and phone that I will jerk away in a second for disrespect. I also want clean rooms and if I don't have that then they know they shouldn't even bother asking fot computer time or to go anywhere.
1 person likes this
@JoyfulOne (6232)
• United States
28 Aug 09
I was strict in some ways, yet reasonable. I never made excuses for them, they had to learn they were responsible for the consequences of their own actions. Mine grew up respectful of adults, respectful of the commandments, and to think for themselves and not do something just because their peers were doing it. Mine have never been in trouble either.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
29 Aug 09
syankee hi hatley here I was strict but I never slapped or spanked'or smacked my children.they hAd time outs,stood in the corner and my 'son gre up to be a good fine man.he is now fifty.I feel smacking,beating, whipping,spanking whatever name you call itis more to ease the parent than to teach your kids anything other than that you are bigger and have the power and one day your kids will be adults who smack their wives and their kids because they grew up to think violence teaches kid right and wrong wrong it only teaches more violence.
• United States
29 Aug 09
I never slapped but spanked, yes. You see if a child is about to hurt either themself or another, they have to be stopped immediately. Talking with stern voice sometimes will work other times it doesn't. They have to remember the spanking to remind them not to disobey causing them to be in danger i.e. crossing a street with cars coming, or hurting someone else like hitting their siblings with an object.
@gossipzz (498)
• Canada
28 Aug 09
children are growing up differently from us today. We had to have respect for our parent,the neighbor and the entire community. My kids are still you and when I try to speak to them they talk back to me. However when they are out in public or by the babysitter, they listen to her. I hope they grow with respect for other people. I believe you need to be strict with them but give them a little freedom. Good luck and happy lotting.
@antiz30 (40)
• United States
2 Sep 09
hello syankee, I have one 8 yrs old daughter and I do consider myself strict. I have spanked her once in her whole life and she still remembers. My husband is not that stricked, he is the one to let her do what ever she wants. She knows that with me she cann't, but my point is that she loves playing with her dad, they are best friends. With me she admires me even though I'm tougher with her, she want to dress, work, cook, clean like me. She has told me she is proud to have a mom like me, and that is the best thing you can hear from your own child so I must be doing something right. lol
• United States
2 Sep 09
wait until she's older daddy will be so over protective with her, i know i was with my daughter, she would get upset my son had more freedom then she did. but now she's 24 and she told me she know why i was that way but i think there is always on parnet who's the bad one lol
@kcoregon (302)
• United States
29 Aug 09
I am not terribly strict with my children. I want them to respect me but I do not want them to fear me. They have their responsibilities and they know what they are though they sometimes need a reminding. They know before playing with friends that they have to have chores done and that their room needs to be tidy. My oldest actually likes to clean and help around the house while my second needs a bit more pushing. They have never talked back to me or any other adults and I always get compliments on their manners and behavior from strangers or from a friend's parent. I believe that we need to teach our children manners, right from wrong, and about responisibility but not to the point to where your kids think you are too strict or are in fear of you. Of course you don't want to be too laid back in your discipline either. I find somewhere in the middle works for me. Make your child afraid of you and they are less likely to open up to you about any problems they are having. I went through this as a child where my mom was so strict I was actually fearful to tell her about the abuse I endured from a sibling. You don't have to be their best friend but they need to know that you are there to support them and nurture them not just bully them and discipline them. Though I agree with what I heard once-to discipline your children is to show them that you love them.
@mrshughes (352)
• Philippines
29 Aug 09
Im too soft for my son..his 3 years of age. His dad is very strict on him on some certain things. I dont make excuses for him if his wrong but i told him and explain to him that he is wrong. So far his been a good boy. I think we are doing alright.
• United States
29 Aug 09
I too was strict to a certain point; however, even though I was married and my husband was always in the picture - he was ill for most of the boys' childhood years. So I had to be both mother and father at times; but I did not make excuses for their behavior. Neither one is married at this time - but they speak of taking care of children at times and making sure that they obey so they are safe.