What you would borrow to your friends and what you won't

@vingyan06 (2488)
Malaysia
September 21, 2009 2:56am CST
Do you let your friends borrow your stuff? Have you ever had a friend or more friends ask to borrow your car, your clothes, your money, your printer or your notebok? What would you borrow and what you won't? Please share your opinions and experience. Lending and borrowing can be a tricky business, especially when friends are involved. There’s more at stake than the stuff being lent or borrowed. There’s a friendship, which is usually the most fragile part of the deal.
3 people like this
22 responses
@carolbee (16231)
• United States
4 Oct 09
I won't loan anything to friends such as my car. I can tell you that I loaned a friend money about 4 years ago. She promised faithfully to pay me back. She claimed she had money owed to her from her previous job and would get that amount to me within two to three months. That never happened. I am slowly collecting the money on a monthly basis but it's been a big inconvenience. By the way, the loan was interest free. This friendship of over 20 years went right in the toilet as a result of her lies and avoiding me. I refuse to beg for something that is mine, that I worked hard for and want in return. I finally had to send her a nasty email explaining the next step would be court. My husband wanted me to sue her but my choice is to be patient and continue to wait. I don't care to have anything to do with her any longer as a result of this mess. If she was such a good friend for all those years, she wouldn't have lied to me. I can deal with the truth much better than a pack of lies that are nonsensical. Not to long ago she openly admitted she had been to one of the local casinos with another friend and lost. You can imagine how that made me feel. Her debt should have been paid prior to gambling.
1 person likes this
@vingyan06 (2488)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
Hello Carol, I am so sorry to hear about that. I don't know why, friendship can easily get spoil by money! Not only that, family relationship could get spoil by money too. Hence I always avoid friends or family members borrow money from me. In fact, I don't like people borrow money from me, be it a small amount. Hope you wouldn't lost a friend because of money issue, take care!
@kitty42 (3906)
• United States
22 Sep 09
Hello I have no problem sharing with others, and I could borrow anything from anyone because I will take care of it, I let my sister use my desk top and now it has a virus all she said to me was it don't work, I said what do you mean it don't work computers don't stop working you did something to it, knowing her she opened something with her idiotic self and screwed up my pc, even if I get it fixed I will more than likely lose what I have on it, just the thought Thank you.
1 person likes this
@vingyan06 (2488)
• Malaysia
22 Sep 09
Hello Kitty, Hope your desk top is got fixed by now. Sometimes if our siblings want to borrow something from us, we just could not say NO to them. But when the things are broken, we don't know should we ask them to compensate for us. Honestly speaking, I don't like to borrow my personal belongings to my friends. But if it is something that I have extra, I don't mind to give them.
@cwong77 (2011)
• Malaysia
21 Sep 09
I don't mind to borrow clothes (sometime if they like it, I even give it to them).. my laptop (if they use it in front of me and I make sure I created another user for them)... Printer and other stuffs (I don't really mind that lot) BUT for money, I am always very careful.. not many people that I can entrust with the money issue, which it can really be an 'excuse' to kill your friendship.. and in order to avoid that, I always keep telling my friend that they can only come to me, if they have gone to others.. and I will ask those who had being asked for this favour.. I just dislike having money to be involved (just like what I am going through now) it's gonna be a big mess! and I still prefer to just say NO!.. and friends, if they think the money is more valuable then, be it.. I can always have friends.. and this will be a good way to see who are they too.. For me, I seldom borrow stuff provided I am really in need.. normally, I get my own stuff myself...
1 person likes this
@vicky30 (4773)
• India
5 Dec 09
I will borrow books from friends so i can study and return it back to them.I will not borrow money as they will keep or irritating me to pay it back.I also would not borrow friends journal or something as if it gets lost i will get a scolding of my lifetime and i will have to make a new journal and write all the notes for him.I will borrow small amounts of money as i can return it to them on time.
@onesiobhan (1330)
• Canada
26 Sep 09
I'll let my friends borrow pretty much anything on a couple of conditions - that they treat my things respectfully and give them back on time. I have certain people I don't' lend things to because they never give things back or they lose or break things. They act insulted when I say no, but I tell them they still have the stuff I loaned them last time!
@drannhh (15235)
• United States
25 Sep 09
Something in our literature says that we should be "Neither a borrower nor a lender" and that is good advice because usually it just causes problems. So over the years I have learned to only loan things that you don't really mind if you don't get them back. So I would not loan my car or clothes or jewelry, or much money. I might loan a CD or DVD if I'd made a backup copy or a book if I had two of the same ones. I would give a friend cuttings to grow from one of my plants with the idea that when hers grew if I needed cuttings back I would get them from her plant. That is sort of like a loan.
@malamar (784)
• Canada
24 Sep 09
My real friends can borrow pretty much anything that I have. As for other people, I never lend anything that I am not willing to risk losing forever. I am particularly selfish with my books however, I have a real problem lending them to anyone including some family members - that's just a personal quirk of mine. No matter who you lend to, there is always the risk that you might never see that item again. This can create some serious rifts in friendships, especially if it is money or more expensive items that are loaned out. It is truly a judgement call, and each "friend" can be very different than you thought they would be.
@oinkgiz (865)
• Singapore
23 Sep 09
hi, thanks for sharing this discussion. regarding to ur question, if i borrow things to my friends?? the answer is, yes, i do borrow things from them & i also let them borrow things from me, i trust them that they will return it back... i can borrow and they can borrow things like clothes, bags, books, dvds & more... but the only thing that i dont want to borrow is undies... hehehe... thanks again... have a nice day and happy mylotting... ^_^
@aerous (13464)
• Philippines
23 Sep 09
Yup! I let my friend borrow my stuff but I won't give my computer because this is important to me. I'm not a money to my friend because I have no money hehe...have anice day!
@jdyrj777 (6547)
• United States
22 Sep 09
I do not barrow or lend anything.
• Boston, Massachusetts
22 Sep 09
hi there, i borrowed the following from friends: traveling bag, laptop, books, cds and money but never will i borrow UNDIES! no way!!! when i borrow things i make sure that i take extra care of it and i return the money on the scheduled day that i promise to pay it.
@parkour (10)
• China
22 Sep 09
I would like to borrow money and other thing except clothes if he or she really needes.But I think not everyone needs to borrow his friend's money ro other things.In China,there is a wording:borrow money can destroy the friendship between two good friends!
• Canada
22 Sep 09
i don't mind lending small amounts of money but i would never borrow something i needed or felt sentimental about. Something like a printer would be fine with me but i wouldn't risk something like my laptop that might have important files. I wouldn't mind borrowing clothes like to friends like hats, jackets, or gloves but that's just about all i would borrow. no pants, undershirts, socks unless absolutely necessary.
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
Sometimes I let my friends borrow stuff from me like money and gadgets, but not clothes and other personal hygiene stuff. And in rare cases, when a friend borrows he never gives it back (fred, i want my money back huhuhu)... If i can give, i would give..
@candaceb87 (1362)
• Canada
22 Sep 09
I tend to avoid lending things as I have been burned so many times in the past! I feel that if someone is truly your friend then they won't ask to borrow everything but I don't mind give and take like say I am out of sugar and need a little until I get to the grocery store and I borrow some and then my friend needs something small like that another day and they help me out but just to have somebody who wants wants wants I try to avoid them.
• Romania
21 Sep 09
i borrow almost everything to my friends, except personal hygiene stuff, like toothbrush and the likes.
@Tantrums (949)
• Philippines
21 Sep 09
I can borrow anything that I want from my friends... Except toothbrushes and underwears.. hahaha!
@haem212 (29)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 09
i will lend all i have except clothes, teeth brush, towel, underwear because this is my personal stuff.
@vivianchen (2646)
• China
21 Sep 09
It depends on how good we are. If the friend who i trust and we are good friend for years, i can borrow everything i have. Car, money, clothes, whatever she/he needs. But if normal people, i will be very careful about the expensive staff like car and money. besides that, i think i will be okay with other things.
@shia88 (4581)
• Malaysia
21 Sep 09
Hello Vingyan, For me, it will depends what my friends want to borrow from me and my situation at that point of time. If talking about money, it has to depend how much is the amount that he/she want to borrow.If I have a capability and it is for emergency cases, for sure I will help up. Some friends know how to takecare the things that they borrow,but some are not. I hate those friends who spoilt my things after borrowing. They are responsible at all and just a word of sorry from his/her mouth. Be aware before you agree to lent your own stuffs to your friends!!