what will you do if your friend borowed money but not give it back?

@buping (954)
China
September 22, 2009 9:14pm CST
hi mylot fellows. recently i am very angry, annoyed and be crazy. one of my friend asked me to borrow her some money because she was very tough in those days. i gave her, and at that time, she said she would give back in a month, but 4 months has been past, she did not reply, even changed the phone number. i contact her only with msn. what should i do???
1 person likes this
9 responses
@bjcyrix (6910)
• Philippines
27 Sep 09
Is this person really your friend? I mean you personally know her and there is a great possibility that you would see her at their home or something like that? Because if you can then you really should track her down. Go to her house or her relative so you can ask where she is to be able to collect the money owed to you. Contact her friends or those who possibly know her and are close to her. That's all I can think of.. We're actually in the same situation. I mean I do let a friend borrow from me, then her sisters borrowed from me as well, when I add it all up, it is a lot of money. They did say that they were going to pay at a certain date but its been 2 months since that date and they still havent given me their payment. Im going to collect tomorrow and Im actually going to their house because I really need the cash for something. Well, first off, I dont let anyone borrow from me that easy. I see to it that I trust them, I have contact with them, and I know where they live. Just in case they dont do what they say they will. If you only know this friend of yours online, then you may have been scammed. Be careful next time, and goodluck.
@buping (954)
• China
27 Sep 09
well you are right. i should think it twice before i borrow to her. we were wormates for 6 months. and at that time i thought she was a really kind person. she was in urgent, so i borrowed her money. at that time, i trust her. and i often borrrow money to my friend in college, they always gave back to me ontime. what a pity.i hope you get your money back. good luck.
1 person likes this
@bjcyrix (6910)
• Philippines
27 Sep 09
Hmm, try to find common friends who knows where she is now. Dont worry about me, I know Ill get what is owed to me, it will just be delayed that's all.
@buping (954)
• China
28 Sep 09
ok, thanks for your suggestion. good luck to me.
1 person likes this
@horsesrule (1959)
• United States
28 Sep 09
Yes, she has proved that you can never trust her with your money ever again. I am afraid that loaning money to friends or family is a bad idea because most of the time, they do not pay it back. She will probably not pay you back ever, I am sorry. It is a terrible thing when we are taken advantage of for being nice to help them out when they are in need.
@buping (954)
• China
28 Sep 09
hey, thanks for your comfort and suggestions to me. now i do not think about it too much for i told myself to take it as a lesson and never did it again. and at the same time, thanks a lot for all of you to give me so many suggestions and comfort. and i started this discussion to let all take my experience as a lesson.
@tvb2009 (237)
• Singapore
23 Sep 09
I have such experience too. Treat it as a lesson learned and never to lend your money easily to others - that's what i learned.
@buping (954)
• China
24 Sep 09
hi, thanks for your comfort. before i was talking about this on mylot, i was really angry, annoyed. but you talked so much to me, some tell me how to ask money back, some tell me to get over it, some comfort me, so i am beter now in mood. you are right, try to forget about this, and take it as a it as a lesson.
• United States
23 Sep 09
unfortunatly, there isn't much that you can do. i have also been in this situation before. it sucks, i know. one thing my mom taught me though was you never loan what you can't afford to lose. so just cut your losses and try to get over it.
@buping (954)
• China
24 Sep 09
hi pckickk, thanks for your comfort. it gave me a big lesson this time, but when she asked me for borrowing her some money, she was really in her bad time, as a friend, i did not think about too much but helped her in cash. after you talked so much to me, i am a little better now. i would try to get over it and no next time in this situation.
@haem212 (29)
• Indonesia
23 Sep 09
well i think its a classic problem, all i can tell is forget your money because your friend will not refund your money (based on your story). Next time if you lend money to a friend whether he could be trusted. Some advise "if you lend money to your friend or someone else, be prepares to lose your money"
@buping (954)
• China
24 Sep 09
hi haem, thanks a lot for your good advice, if you lend money to your friend or someone else, be prepare to lose your money. that's quite true. i would not lend money to someone that we have no one common friend, so i can not ask it back, even meet her. it gave a good lesson this time, and thanks again for your advice.
@coolcat123 (4391)
• India
23 Sep 09
I am facing the same situation, the problem is that she forgot that she has taken money from me.So, i feel very bad asking her my money back.Its about 4-5 yrs and so i have forgotten the matter and dont want the money back.
@buping (954)
• China
24 Sep 09
hi coolcat, you are a good person. if it is in a large amount, i think you would ask her to take back. i can not understand those people that forgot taking money from others, if i lent money from some one, i know that she did do me a favor. and i would try my best to give it back as soon as possible.
@cavella (98)
• Indonesia
23 Sep 09
meet her! It did happen to me, i give her some money, and say "This is the last money i give you, you dont have to pay it back, i dont trust you anymore. " She used you..
@buping (954)
• China
24 Sep 09
hi, cavella. you are a kind person i think, at least very kind to your friend. it is unlucky for both of us to make such a friend. but as you know your friend would not give your money back, why did you give her money one more time? even do not ask for back?
• India
23 Sep 09
It depends on the money he/she borrowed. If its a small amount I won't bother to ask but if its a large amount I expect it back and here there is a point to mention if my friend takes money from me and didn't return it then he would lose his value before me and there might be ripples in my friendship and I don't want that.I don't want money to come in my friendship and if my friend also thinks in that way he would definitely give my money or atleast tells me why he was unable to give me the money so that there won't be any misunderstandings..
@buping (954)
• China
23 Sep 09
hi, thanks for your suggestion, first, it is not in a small amount. actually my friend has lost her value to me. money actualy destroyed our friendship. and i do not know whether we will meet each other in our life, i hope not. but the question now is that i have to have my money back. because i am also in my tough time.
@gaohua (13)
• China
28 Sep 09
well you are unlucky to have such a friend.