Would you hide your true feelings to your best friend?

Philippines
September 25, 2009 1:33am CST
We all know that best friends are always there for us especially in times of trouble. They are on our side ready to listen, help and will never leave us hanging. No matter how far they are, they will surely find ways to show their love, concern and support. But wait! What if you accidentally fall in love with your best friend? You just suddenly felt that you are beginning to love him more than friend. Would you be brave enough to admit it to him? Or you would just keep it to yourself for you are afraid of lossing your bestfriend when things didn't work out right? What if he feels the same way about you, would you give it a try? Do you think its worth risking your friendship? Given all the senarios and you decided to be true to yourself. You have finally confessed your love to him then he told you that he is inlove with somebody else who is close to you, how will you deal with it? Knowing that he already knew how you feel for him? Kinda awkward, huh! Are you going to play like Julia Roberts in my bestfriend's wedding?
2 people like this
10 responses
@feodda (579)
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
It is true that our best friend is always at our side, no matter what will happen. This happen to me in my High School Days. We were classmate since Elementary Years and we're very close friend, to the point he became my best friend. I rely on him. During our Fourth Year High School, I feel something different between us. A love that is more than a Best Friend, but I never told him about my feelings because I was afraid to lose him totally in my life. But we have a common friend that knows both our feelings towards each other. He has a feeling towards me too. Knowing it, making us feeling awkward to each other. Classmates and Friends starting to tease us and trying to let our relationship to go in higher level. We both love each other. But we decided to let our relationship as best friend remains as a Best Friend. We never go to any higher level. We preserve the friendship we had, afraid that someday it will destroy. It is still a good thing for us. Until now, we're still best of friends.
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
Nice to know that you are still bestfriends til now. But dont you have any regret at all? Does it ever crossed your mind, what if you guys go into a higher level? Wouldn't be nice also to think and imagine that you will end up together? I mean you both know each other so much, may be you will be a great couple. How would you know if you will not give it a try :)? Hahaha! Just wanting you to think.
1 person likes this
@feodda (579)
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
Of course, it came to a point asking myself to give a try or if given a chance to be back in the situation. Especially, I have gone through many broken-hearted but he was their to support me. We ask ourselves, what if you will court me and how will our relationship be? It will be a great relationship, knowing that we known for many years and knowing our weakness and strength. But know, we still best of friend. We have different relationship and have different partner in LIFE.
• Philippines
30 Sep 09
You are both thinking what if... I understant that right now you have your own partners but isn't it unfair to your partners knowing that you too have something that you just trying to control. Well you see, getting to the next level with your bestfriend is not a mortal sin. By the way you describe your relationship with your best friend, I can tell that you two feel morethan friends for each other but you are trying hard not to release it. Aren't your partners not getting jealous? I mean no matter how you hide and control it, am sure your partners still observed it. Isn't it nicer to have your best friend as your partner in life? You know each other well and I think no matter what happens, your friendship will still be there. You two will be extra careful also because you are valueing not just your relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend but as well as your friendship. Your friendship will be your strong foundation. I believe no matter how long will it take, if you are both for each other , you will end up together. You may both count your relationships but in the end if its really the two of you, you cannot fight anymore your fate. Goodluck and happy mylotting. Thank you for responding! :)
@anurag3786 (6274)
• India
25 Sep 09
No I am not hide my true feelings to my best friend..because...i have shared everything to my best friend..so why i kide my true feelings from him.. i think.. we don't hide our true feeling's from our best friend..
1 person likes this
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
Right. I also think that its better to let your feelings come out. Even if there is no assurance. The more you hide it the more it will become obvious. If he is truly is your friend he will understand and respect how you feel. Love is unconditional, we don't love a person because we are expecting him to love us back. If he does then good. Its better that way, than to think what if.. and what if... at least you've tried. Being true to yourself is not bad at all.
• Philippines
28 Sep 09
for me, if i really love my bestfriend, though hard and risky, i'll still take my chances of telling him my feelings. But ofcourse, whatever happens, friendship will still remain. I guess, its better to tell him than to keep it to yourself, who knows he might have the same feelings for you but he's just hesitant to tell you because he consider your friendship. However, if things didnt go well as you imagine it to be, you have to acecpt this. if he loves somebody else, accept it and life should go on. at first it will be hard to be the same again but later when you find the right guy for you, things will get better. Its hard to suppress feelings. be true to yourself always because its hard to keep it in yourself.
• Philippines
30 Sep 09
Yes that is true, we will never know unless we try. Being true is always the answer. It will really take sometime to bring back the closeness you have before if your relationship with your bestfriend dont workout. But am sure you will both overcome and deal with it in a mature way. Friendship is always there no matter what happens. Your concern and love for each other will never be gone. The time and things that you both been through together hardens your friendship. Thanks for responding.
@eLsMarie (4348)
• Philippines
26 Sep 09
supposing that my best friend is a boy and i accidentally fell in love with him, i will tell him the truth because i know for sure that he'll understand because he is my best friend. i don't think that that the foundation of friendship can just be easily ruin just for a reason that i no sees him only as a friend but more than that. as long as both our intentions are good then i won't hesitate to have a romantic relationship with him if he feels the same way too. if he's in love with somebody else, i will respect that anyways i'm not expecting that after i confess everything he'll fall for me too. i just want him to be aware so that he won't misinterpret my feelings in the future and so that he won't avoid himself from falling for somebody else just because he does not want to hurt me. if you truly love a person, you'll always think about his/her happiness.
• Philippines
30 Sep 09
Love is unconditional. It doesn't mean that when we confessed our feelings to someone we are waiting or expecting something in return. Being true to ourselves will set us free. Love is the most wonderful gift that you can give and am sure bestfriends will appreciate that. They will not deal with it negatively if they don't feel the same way as you do.
@Melbee11 (233)
• United States
26 Sep 09
I would be scared to tell them that I fell for them. I'm not afriad to tell anybody that. Especially if you like your best friend. I wouldn't keep a secret like that from a best friend. I would tell them straight out. It would be a shocker them and to me. They would have to know eventually.
• Philippines
29 Sep 09
Right, you really cannot hide your true feelings. You may deny it but your actions and gestures will show it. The more you try to hide it, the more it will become obvious. Yes both of may feel uncomfortable and awkward at first but remember you are still the same bestfriends and that fact cannot be changed.
• China
26 Sep 09
I have a friend,I liked him more than friend.But I did not speak to him start.And then he have a girl friend.I know he did not love his girl friend very much.Because he said his girl friend treat him nice,So he accept her.Some time later,I hint him I like him,he did not accept.But we just forget it,and we still are friend.We will cherish our friendship I think
• Philippines
29 Sep 09
For girls, what we can do is to just give a man hints that we like him. At least you make yourself known. Its not bad at all to fall in love with your bestfriend. Its not a mortal sin. If he reciprocate your love then better if not just be remain friends. There is only two possibilities, its either you win his love or your love be rejected. But being true will make yourself free from all regrets and questions. Love is a wonderul feeling and friends will always understand if you accidentally fall in love with him/her.
@lynnemg (4538)
• United States
25 Sep 09
I think that it would depend on several different factors. First, how long have the two been friends and what are their ages now. If it is a high-school friendship, I would be less likely to say anything, but if it were an adult friendship, I would probably speak up if, and only if he were single, he showed some sign that he may possibly feel the same, and I was fully prepared to accept the fact that I may be rejected. I think that in high-school, rejection is much harder to deal with and because of this, I would probably keep things to myself.
• Philippines
30 Sep 09
I agree if its a high school friendship, maybe it is just an infatuation. May be they misinterpretted the true meaning of love because they are too young still. And maybe its just the companionship that they love. And of course if your bestfriend is married or on a relationship, I don't think its right to say that thing. It will just complicate things. And it is not nice to ruin any relationship. Its bad luck.
@Craicha (801)
25 Sep 09
nope for me i dnt hide it especially his my bestfriend and just in case il say it that i got special feelings for him at least i can know what will he think and what he will answer for this ......i really say what i felt for him...coz i might regret someday if il nah say my true feelings towards him..... infact my BF is my bestfriend :)....i'm just being honest with my feelings...hope you will too
• Philippines
30 Sep 09
Wow that is great! I know you are happy. I believe friendship is the strong foundation of every relationship. It is not bad to fall in love and get into the next level with your best friend. I think that should be the thinking of everyone. If in case the feelings is one sided, then you should let go and move on. Friends always respect each other and they say the truth even if the truth hurts. Thank you for your comment.
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
No, I would say it even I am shy than to hide it. It is good to try than regret later having not say the words which you like to express. If the feelings is mutual then it is good if the other person reciprocate and notice you. Then, if he does not care about my feeling I'll give up and let him go. letting go is the best way to make your love free, even it hurts it is better than forcing.
• Philippines
25 Sep 09
Well this thing is really not happening on me, just a thought. And I dont think it will happened on me because I am a married woman. Anyways If I will be asked this questions also, I will tell my friend how I felt for him. For the fact that, I cannot simply hide it from him. But when I tell him, I will also stress out that I am not expecting anything in return. I am just being open to him cause he is my friend. I think its only fair to be honest to your best friend.
@skysuccess (8881)
• Singapore
25 Sep 09
lovelyn_medrano, I think this love is still hovering heavily around the notion of companionship. I mean, of course, love is companionship, but when that's the only thing you could see in your own relationship, somehow, you will probably experience a cap or stagnation in growth. Is love merely companionship, taking the last bus ride back home and still feeling spiritually empty at the end of it? I am sure everybody generally agrees with the element of compromising in a relationship, but what if compromising becomes a relatively short term measure to a potential, brewing bigger problem? And that would probably be the time when you would want to analyze the root of the problem and resolve them before it becomes a real headache in your relationship (as it probably has been an issue right now). I personally know of several people having the same sort of archetype personality like you; they somewhat believe that a partner is a panacea to every little thing in life. Goodness, how tiring would that sound like? The real underlying issue is but themselves. Oh, just in case you forget, this life of yours is not a box office hit, it is going to get very real and could really slap you on the face if you refuse to be conventionally logical. So, get real here!