when does a doctor's advice stop being helpful and become stupid feeling?
@scarlet_woman (23463)
United States
September 30, 2009 12:36am CST
i was speaking to a friend about their terminally ill parent-and it reminded me of when my own father was dying.now,in his case,i'm sure the doctor was going by rote,and perhaps truly meant well..
but keep in mind this was a terminal case,as in immanent death.
the man had osteo (bone),lung,liver and kidney cancer.
bone alone is usually a death sentence in most cases,unless amputation is possible-except in the spine,where he had it.
anyway..the doc was telling me no salt.no sugar.
no coffee..no fatty foods.all the things he still enjoyed.
(by that point,he weighed 140-a bag of bones for an almost 6 ft 5 man)
hey doc..did you miss the dying part?
he's my dad..and right now,if he wants a sundae,coffee and white castles at 3 am 4 hours away in new york,he's gonna get it.
if he wants pork rinds and pixie sticks..he's gonna get it.
donuts?yes'm.
what is the point of depriving someone whose moments are numbered?
in his case it wouldn't have extended it,or made him any more comfortable.
to make this a discussion-did you ever have to care for a terminal relative,where
your doctor's advice just sounded ridiculous?
1 person likes this
2 responses
@bunnybon7 (50970)
• Holiday, Florida
30 Sep 09
most certainly. i could not believe they would not even let my husband have water!! only ice chips. i asked them why and they said something about it makeing his pain worse? well, he was going through pain being thirsty. and here was a man that NEVER drank coke, was begging for a sip of coke. so his daughter and i would sneak him sips of our cokes in hospice. 
i felt guilty, but i would have a lot more if i hadnt. another thing, they said he couldnt smoke any more. well, whats the point? when he was still home, we took the oxygen off and helped him outside for a few puffs
he was dying anyway. 
@bunnybon7 (50970)
• Holiday, Florida
22 Oct 09
i sure did. and his daughter and i snuck in coke and let him have sips of water. i would not have been able to live with myself if we didnt. thanks for best response.
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
6 Dec 09
Yes, when my sister was dying, they had her on a special, limited diet, and she was not very happy about it. At the time, we did not realize just how quickly she was going to die, so we tried to follow the diet for the most part, hoping that it would help extend her life a few precious days or perhaps even weeks. We did sneak some treats in for her, though, and I am very glad that we did, because we did not have even the shortest amount of time that they predicted we would have with her. Now, I wish that we had not even pretended to adhere to their strict rules, but we were trying to do the right thing by helping her to live the fullest and longest life possible. I know that the little things that we did for her she really enjoyed, though, like the special dark chocolate treats that we could slip into our pockets and sneak to her when the doctors and nurses weren't looking.
1 person likes this
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
22 Dec 09
exactly.i think doctors forget sometimes that little joys can add to quality of life too.i know if i was looking at nothing but furina to eat,i'd wanna hurry up going.
