Please don't break what's left of my fragile heart. :(
By resssaaa
@resssaaa (445)
Philippines
October 1, 2009 9:10pm CST
I really dont know what to do right now. Based on my previous discussions about my love life, I don't know how to make him mine again. It sucks. I try my best everyday and even now to smile and be ok but deep inside Im really hurting and crying and i think this is the hardest part of hiding your feelings. I don't know what i am to do anymore. :( You see, he still like treats me like im still his girlfriend with all the care and everything, well not as much as before but still you could still feel the love. But its like he wants me to move on and everythin. But his family knows we're still a couple and he still wears the necklace i gave him and he still disciplines me, or whatever, the point is he still cares even though he says its over. One time he said that we're friends now thats whats important and fate will just decide if we'll become together again someday. What does that mean? a close friend of ours said that its impossible that just because he said its over it doesnt mean we won't be together again and all she strongly believes we would be together again but it would take time. I don't know what to do im afrai he would see someone else oh God help me :( It still hurts until now. I want him now.. :|
1 person likes this
9 responses
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
2 Oct 09
hi resssaas I dont understand why you would want him to
discipline you are you not an adult, and is he just a boyfriend'or your daddy, this is rather different to me.
American women would not want their boyfriends to discipline
them as that went out when they grew up, only parents
discipline their children. not adults to Adults, that sounds
rather sick to me.If he wants you to move on, you are going
to have to come to terms with that. keep him as a friend but
you find someone to love you and only you.Let him see someone
else, why want a man who disciplines you? you are an adult,you discipline yourself now. you are no longer a child. grow up and move on.
1 person likes this
@madugulagopi (1093)
• India
2 Oct 09
Hi resssaaa
I really don't know what to say in this kind of situation but I have been in the same kind of situation before, but I am telling you that it would be like hell if he meets some other woman. I will tell you my story. Same thing happened as yours. we were lovers for a very good time and then suddenly something happened,she came to me and told its not working lets be friends. I thought it is not over yet and I can still get her back and so I hanged out with her still as a friend hoping that she would come back. That is the mistake I have done. Biggest mistake. He found another guy and hell started for me. She used to talk with him happily infront of me and used to say things like he is so cool, very caring etc etc. Ofcourse she is not to blame because she already said that its over between us. The blame is mine for still hoping that she would come back. So my sincere advise is if he is still treating you as a friend get away from him as soon as possible. It would be more devastating if he meets another woman and u are still with him.I am telling this out of experience.
However if you are very confident that you can get him back stay with him and try to get him as fast as possible.
All the best
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
2 Oct 09
1. You can't be friends if one of you still wants to be lovers, it just doesn't work
2. You can't make somebody want you
I would make a complete break from him. If he wants to be with you, he will come and find you. And if he doesn't, it will hurt you so much more to see him moving on with somebody else. It is going to take time to get over your broken heart. Time away from him. Probably a lot of time.
@my_name_is_coco (4334)
• Philippines
3 Oct 09
I understand how you feel now.best is you deal with it now.cry,rant,scream out of frustration until you can't take it anymore.after that,you can start moving on already.go out with friends,meet new people,don't go on rebound relationship.use this time to discover yourself and learn more about you.splurge and spoil yourself.who knows,while on the process of loving your fab self,you will meet someone new.
@kutedarsu (254)
• India
2 Oct 09
There are people who would dump their girlfriend and hide themselves or find another girl sooner or later. But sometimes it would turn out in way that an ex might be treating one as a real friend. It shows that he is genuine and unconditional in showing love. It really shows his maturity in handling someone's emotions. So when he says its over, I probably feels he really means it. But then, no harm in telling what you feel like, which will help you find a solution. Time can certainly heal the pain and make you think that you were lucky to have had someone like him in your life who taught a lot of things emotionally, rather than thinking that he was not yours. So take a few leaves out of his books, and I'm sure things will work out well
@forptc (287)
• Philippines
2 Oct 09
Give yourselves some space, specially yourself now that you're hurting so much with what's happening between the both of you. Come on, he's broken up with you and yet he still treats you the way he did when you were both together. That's inconsiderate specially with him knowing you still love him. He broke up with you in the first place so it means that you, staying away from him, mending your broken heart and moving on with your life wouldn't be a big deal for him. The early stages after a breakup is the most difficult but you really have to move on. Stay away from the places you've both been, from doing the things you both do, from ANYTHING that would remind you of him. Go out, meet people, that's the best you can do to forget or just lift your spirits. Avoid being alone. You must learn to let go and let time tell you if you're both still meant to be back together. At this point, there's nothing much you could do to bring things back the way they were.
@miamilady (4910)
• United States
2 Oct 09
I've never seen your discussions before, so I don't know the history of your relationship except for what I've seen in this post.
To me, it sounds like you are in an extremly unhealthy relationship.
It sounds like you were his mistress and in some ways you still are.
It sounds like he wants you to be available to him at his convenience and like right now it is less "convenient" for him than it was in that past.
It sounds to me like that really isn't love. I'm sorry to sound so harsh, but I think you need to hear this.
You are a beautiful young woman and you can do better.
He disciplines you? That's a hard one for me to relate to. Where I come from grown women don't need to be disciplined. If they want to, that's a different story and I won't judge that, but I think women have the right to think for themselves and take care of themselves and have their needs met without being "disciplined".
I really hope you are able to move on and find someone that respects you and appreciates you and truly loves you in a HEALTHY way.
@tonniek02 (457)
• United States
2 Oct 09
I was married to a man for 12 years that I thought would never do anything to hurt me. But he did... The one thing I could over look. He had an affair. I gave him my heart and my sole. And I never looked at another man after we got together. We had 2 beautiful children and then BAM....there she was!!! That was a hurt I had never felt before. But I knew I could never get past it....I fild for Divorce and it was hard but, I moved on...He wanted me to take him back, but he wanted to keep the girlfriend to....I couldn't and wouldn't do that. I have remarried and found love again. It will and can happen for you...First you need to just stay away from him... Don't let him use you. Start going out with friends and have some fun. You will find the joy in making your own mind up to what you want to do and where you want to go. As far as the necklace. Guys don't think like weman. And if you really want him back then act as if you are fine and happy without him...Don't act intrested and when he trys to treat you like his girlfriend, Don't let him.....Most Guy want what they can't have. And if he sees that you have moved on and you act like you don't care..He will want you back.....
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
2 Oct 09
hello ressssa,
That is one tough situation you got there. well, maybe some parts of that relationship still applies in friendships too. probably it's best to let him go for the moment and let time heal, or let the fire of passion sets up again for the both of you. i don't think you should rush him to go back to or it might give him more reason to move away farther from you. give him space, when he misses you that's probably the time that he might re-consider.