please help! My friend is in the middle of nowhere. I do not know what advice...

Philippines
October 3, 2009 8:07pm CST
Hello mylotters! Friend of mine opened up to me few weeks ago asking me for a piece of advice regarding a very difficult question because it involves her family. The situation is like this: Her father and cousin is having a very close relationship. This too much closeness leads to a present problem that they had. They heard that her father is giving an additional allowance to her cousin without anybody knowing it even her family. With this they are curious and ask question if her father is having an affair with her cousin. She witness the pain in her mother's eyes and even before her mother never used to invading the privacy of her dad just to seek for any proof of this rumor. Such of this are: getting her dad mobile phone and ask to read the messages inside it. However, when it is her time that she is asking for an additional allowance, her father kept on complaining that he don't have a money any more and refereed it to her mom instead. I don't think this is jealousy. She was deeply disturb about it witnessing that her mom & dad fight from time to time because of it. What advice should I give her. If you were a daughter of her dad what should you do? How will you react to this kind of situation? Please help! Thank you very much!
1 person likes this
2 responses
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
4 Oct 09
angelswings hi I really do not know just what to say'as your friend is in a tough situation. she dislikes her dad and mom fighting.does she have other close relatives she could go to'for some really sound advice? like a grandparent or uncle or Aunt they would be more likely to be able to help her than anything that I could say. I do not know all the situation and would not want to say anything to make it worse for your friend.
• Philippines
7 Oct 09
Yes, she has however she was afraid that this might started the worst situation that may lead to a very tough decision that her mother could ever make.
• Philippines
4 Oct 09
Ok this is a family problem and they are the ones who can really fix things out. I conclude that the cousin you are talking about is almost the same age as you and your friend, am I right? We don't know what is really happening and if there is really some thing that is going on between her father and cousin. I cannot give advice unless it is proven. Again, like what I often say, it is not wise to jump into conclusion. Better confront the father and by that, she weights if her father is telling the truth or not. So how would she confront her father? Just ask simple questions that are indirect like asking about her cousin's financial needs or anything similar that she can think of. Questions that aren't directly pointing out into something. Good timing is also necessary. It will also help if she will talk to her mother about this. In times like this, her mother needs someone she can talk to. Tell your friend to be brave enough. I know her family will get over this thing. Goodluck.