Pre Marital Counseling

This is another wonderful discussion baby,and I know we went to Premarital Counseling before we got married,and it was with the pastor of the church that married us,and I know we were a little nervous at first because we were not sure what to expect,but we were okay once we started,and we were given books that we had to work in with different scenarios and questions,that we had to answer and then share with each other,and I also think it helped a lot,even though a bunch of the stuff we had already shared or talked about,and the books are something we can look back on in later years especially if we ever get upset or mad at each other,I love you with all of my heart and soul,have a great day,good luck with all of your mylotting goals,and Happy Posting.

I wish more couples would get pre-marital counceling.. perhaps then there wouldn't be nearly as many divorces as there are. I did not get pre-marital counceling. We didn't get married in a church either. We could have used it! Our relationship is very strong, stronger than most, but we had a few years where it got really rocky due to stress, pressure, the kids, and the finances. To this day our relationship is not perfect, but at least we're working on it. I think if we'd had councelling before getting married and had learned how to really talk to each other when we have problems (instead of shouting, blaming, or closing down) it would have saved us a lot of grief, and we wouldn't have as much to work on right now (although it's been a couple years since the big problems, we're still working past some hurt and anger we held on to since then).

my hubby and i did and then the minister took us out for supper the following year. hubby and i have been married almost 22 years (this coming saturday is our anniversary!) so i guess something went right eh?

Yes, we did the pre-marital counseling before marriage. It is a requirement by the church and by the law. Actually, we have 3 counselings first before we vow. One from a Church group, requirement of the church. Another is from the government. And lastly is from the priest himself. We really learned a lot from this. Its tiring but its ok.

Hi Amber, I asked you what this involved so well done turning it into a discussion. By the way someone has just started a discussion in the interest named after you, maybe it's a friend but I can't see why it's in there. Anyway now you've explained it it really isn't my cup of tea at all and I wouldn't do it but counselling does tend to be more of an American thing and it could well be a good idea for you as you are a very young bride and Mr Hellcowboy was open to it too.

Yes somCowgirl, I believe pre-marital counseling is prerequisite in church wedding. My husband and I undergone that also but we don't have that kind of booklet that you are talking about. It is more on discussions. We were also told on the last day of counselling to make a letter for each other and read that on our wedding itself. That we will keep and look every time we are going into rough times. That letters will serve as our reminder about our promises to each other.

I really wish that my partner was open for pre-marital counseling , of course he isn't.... All I know is relationships are hard work!!! and keeping a happy marriage should be even harder!!! why not get help?

i am not yet married but i think this is a great idea for any couple that's looking to get married. i think it's important for couples to be on the same page before they commit to each other.

hi SomeCowgirl no my husband and I did not go through counseling before marriage, but I am certainly for it. We did not have many problems and we always worked out the ones we did have. But for one thing we were at little older, so that probably helped a lot. I was thirty one, and my hubby was 37. I have had a lot of friends who did do this as a requirement of their church, and they all had nothing but good to say about the counseling. I really think it does a lot of good.

If I were to be married in the religion in which I was raised, it would be a requirement to be married within the church. I think the establishment of household roles was a pretty good concept. I think that the premarital counsleing has good intentions and actually gives the couple a few good tools to work with in the future.

Yes we did do pre marital counseling with our pastor. Are you Lutheran we are and it is a requirement. We have been married over a decade and going strong while others we know haven't made it to the 2 or 3 year mark.

We in our church we don't do that the only guide is the book titled Secret of happy family it's a good guide to everyone.

yah, we attended our pre-marital counseling and it was very solemn..it's really prerequisite by our church..i wish our church have that also, a workbook, coz i love collecting all our wedding memorabilia, something to talk about when i and my wife get old.

i think this kind of counseling can make new couple confuse, because the therapist usually give different solution with our solution, we should make it natural, that is the best solution, you must start your family with natural habit =)

Actually I think that this is the Best thing that any couple can do, and something that can help a couple before marriage learn more about each other as well. My pastor of the Church I attend requires any couple in the Church that he is going to marry to go thru this, and even shares his views on Marriage and Divorce. But honestly I think sometimes it gives you new ways to look at things you may never have considered before as well.

SomeCowgirl, Having had mine before I got married, I just felt that premarital counseling should be made mandatory for every couple who are contemplating marriage in every religion or better still before solemnization at the registry office. Both my wife and me benefited a lot from this counseling and it did prepare us with a lot of insight of what is going to happen ahead of us. I feel that these sessions do touch on a lot of other aspects in a marriage and this awareness actually helped us prepare ourselves ahead. At least, it made us aware that we are not getting married because of some adrenalin rush, fad or peer pressure. Sometimes, I wonder why premarital counseling had not gone beyond to other religions as well. Anyway, that will really be up to them and in another discussion.

Hi! If my husband and I had gotten married in a church, it would have had to be a non-denominational church, and I'm not sure if they require counseling. I was raised Catholic (although I do not follow man's religion laws any longer; I follow the Bible), and my mother tried to greatly encourage us to get married in the Catholic church. They required counseling. I refused for two reasons: I do not follow a certain religion, I follow my faith, and secondly, for a child-free couple, marriage counseling at a Catholic church would be asking for an argument. We were married by a non-denominational pastor who could give counseling, but we didn't go through it. I was afraid that after he learned we did not want children he would not marry us (I have spoken to many child-free couples who have had this problem). I also didn't think it was necessary as we had been together for four years and had gone through every problem in the book, only coming out stronger. Being married, for us, has been a lot easier and less problematic than being engaged so far, so I still believe we did the right thing. I hope it helps you in your situation, though, since you are going through it. It sounds like it was a positive experience for you, and that's all that matters.