My son is autistic

October 29, 2009 4:20pm CST
My son has recently been diognosed with Autism, he is nine. I have known he has had difficulties since he was 2, but it has taken this long for the doctors to finally make a diognoses. Now my son has the diognoses, I am guarenteed that the support the school have put in place will always be in place for him as without it he would never cope. I was just wondering if any other parents here had any difficulties in getting a diognoses for their child or is it easier in America for example. I feel my son has been let down in his early years as the resources that would have been available have been denyed him.
2 people like this
14 responses
• United States
30 Oct 09
yes my son is also Autistic so I have an idea of what your going threw my son was diagnosed at two yrs old. Before that he had brain exams and other testing because he was a premature baby and none of the results show anything pertaining to any mental disorders so it was mind blowing to find out he was Autistic I knew something was different about him because he very irritable and played with toys differently. He also cried to the top of his lungs when nothing appeared to be wrong. He was diagnosed by the child behavior specialist at First step and my life has never been the same since. After excepting the diagnoses i realized there's lots of support out there so hang on there! I can't understand why they never found out earlier but hopefully with new medical tools doctors can diagnose the symptoms of this baffling mental disorder from birth.
1 person likes this
30 Oct 09
It would be so much easier and so much less stressful if there was a way of running one simple test and finding out. But I think it will be a long time until that happens, as if you have a group of autistic children some will be severely autistic and others only slightly. Also because other needs are very closely linked I feel it is almost impossible to be able to have a test that gives a clear diognoses either way.
@mommaj (22870)
• United States
29 Oct 09
I'm in the us. As far as the school system, they just put a mentally delayed label on the autistic child and even if he has a doctor's diagnosis they aren't worried about changing the label until the child is old enough to go to kindergarten. I think that is wrong. It makes everyone involved look lazy. Just keep moving forward and try not to dwell on what could have been done. Keep fighting for what can and will be done.
29 Oct 09
Thanks for replying. Its the opposite here in the UK I cannot fault his school at all. They have been so supportive from the offset. He has had all the support they could give him at school. They obviously felt as I did that he needed it. I just wish the medical system wasn't such a battle. Its hard enough coping with a child who has extra needs without the extra stress that the system brings. But yes as parents we will always fight for the best for our children
@mommaj (22870)
• United States
29 Oct 09
We were fortunate. We don't have to battle the school just because their services are the same for either diagnosis. They think a child needs help and they get them the help. Fortunately for me, I had a decent doctor who saw my concerns and referred me. We were lucky.
30 Oct 09
My family doctors has been great, but its been the other professionals. The first response I had was he was just imateur for his age. Well yes he is immateur but I know his problems go further than just being immateur and it was a long battle to prove it. Luckily because the school has been so supportive and has provided letters to send on he now has the diognoses.
@dawnald (84201)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 09
My son is 9 also and he was diagnosed with autism when he was 4. We also noticed difficulties starting when he was 2. We got a diagnosis right away from a psychiatrist and also the Regional Center (they control certain federal resources that are available), but not from the school district. They tried to put him into the system with an eligibility of "developmentally delayed". Our regional center representative told us that because they did that, they could deny him certain things such as speech therapy and occupational therapy, and that, since we did have a diagnosis, we could fight it. We did that and they changed his eligibility. Since then, we haven't had any problems with the system.
29 Oct 09
Thankyou for your response. Daniel is having speech and language therapy with occupational therapy. It was only when the speech and language therapist saw my son that the doctors finally gave him the diognoses. I was fighting for years just for him to be assessed. He was seem by a child mental health nurse when he was two and she told me she suspected autism. I hadn't even heard of it before. But even though my sons school were supportive the medical system haven't been. A have fought for 7yrs just to get Daniel a full assessment. Not for autism but on the wider spectrum, because as a parent I knew there was something and wanted a proper diognoses. I have heard the medical system you use in the USA is so much better than here the fact your child was picked up on so early proves my point.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84201)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 09
The medical system is pretty good IF you have insurance.
@dawnald (84201)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Nov 09
thanks for the best response... my insurance premiums for next year are going to go WAY up...
@biman_s (1060)
• India
30 Oct 09
I had a friend who was autistic and we were in the same school. Some of the kids behaved badly to him but most of them were nice to him and tried to help him out. I live in India and medical treatment and diagnosis is very poor considered to America and other countries. Getting a right diagnosis is not easy. Its good that you got the diagnosis and you live in America.
30 Oct 09
I live in the UK now America. My son does struggle at school and has been bullied quite badly. Its sad but kids are cruel and if you are not one of the crowd then you don't fit in. He gets picked on because he is different. But it bothers me more than it does my son. Sometimes he doesn't understand when someone is even being nasty to him.
30 Oct 09
I live in the UK NOT America I meant sorry
• United States
16 Nov 09
The schools in my area were excellent with my son. When I sent him to preschool, I had no idea how to get him diagnosed. When he started the placement testing in school they discovered that he has aspergers syndrom, and put him in the appropriate programs right away. I have now found an excellent pediatrician, that is able to do the diagnosis for me. It should make life a lot easier with regard to making sure he has everything he needs to function in society.
16 Nov 09
You have just strengthened my believe that there is more in America medically for children than there is here in the uk. Things seem to be noticed and diagnosed a lot quicker. There is a limited amount available to us here that I know of, unless we go and hunt for it. I am part of a local support group, and he is getting a little extra help at school. But not much really we are just supposed to get on with it. Thanks for replying
@charblaize (1028)
• United States
15 Nov 09
My son was diagnosed with a mild austism when he was about 3, but he also has ADHD, ODD, behavioral issues. When he was 18 months, he wasn't even speaking, cooing or making any sounds so we felt he would be deaf, we took him in and they done some tests and couldn't find anything wrong. This kept going til he was 3 and ready to go to preschool, finally he started saying some word, but would point, scream, grunt, and sign. He didn't "talk" until he was 4, wasn't potty trained until he was 4, didn't ride a bike until he was 5 1/2. He wrote on all walls all the time, would consistently pound on his toys, would sit and hit his head on the wall. He still don't talk in corrective sentences, has trouble with his L's, SQ's, and T's. He has a hard time with his social skills, don't play with many kids and will keep insisting on one thing whether a toy, food, or movie until we watch, eat, or play with. He gets very upset if someone moves his toys his is playing with or putting it up. Things have to be in a certain order, it almost reminds me of OCD. rearranging is very hard, he does not like change. It took them a few years to diagnose him as mild austic tendencies but we finallly got it. He gets help at school, though I am fighting with them to get him tested for learning disabilities, he is struggling really bad in math and can't seem to "retain" information. I have a student helper come over and help him, I do extra worksheets and activities with him at home, then it will take 2 hours to a sheet for he will get upset, tired and we have to take a break. I have him in speech therapy, occupational therapy, behavioral therapist, and a therapist comes to the house. I will take him to activities that are available in our community, have him in sports, and try to do my best. It isn't easy, but I wouldn't change him for the world. At the same time, I am learning myself along with him and learning about patience.
16 Nov 09
I definitely have had to learn patience and your right they are worth every second. My son was late to potty train and he still struggles at night. It was a relief to finally get a diagnoses after battling for years. Its opened up many doors for him at school. He gets a lot more support. My son would refuse to do any clubs until recently at school. Now he is part of choir, dance, a sports club and we go to a separate special needs club thats not organized by school. If it wasn't for people at school picking on his differences then he would be doing really well
@Rtlsnk316 (1197)
• Mexico
13 Nov 09
Hello, I have a cousin who's autistic and he's a teenager now, he's been treated I guess properly with both medical and educational support because among other things he's very smart and behaves properly with people. Recently because of a friend of mine, I've been involved with lots of information regarding Transfer Factors, the product along with the business. I don't get easily convinced, I'm a very analytical person and always have to ask the "why's" of everything if it doesn't sound too logical for me. It has come to my attention in a couple of months of my own research besides personal proof and the testimony of people known by people I know and trust, that Transfer Factors are proven to be, maybe the resource many people have been looking for, regarding illnesses, conditions, diseases and other related issues including autism. I'm definitively not saying "this is it", but the facts are just so amazing that one just has to find out for themselves and I would really like for you to take the opportunity and do your own diligent research. I have some links and information about Transfer Factors, autism and advice from professionals (doctors) I'm sure you'll find interesting. Since I can't post links, feel free to PM me, add me as a friend and I'll be happy to respond your questions the best way I can. Warm regards.
16 Nov 09
I am definitely interested in anything that might help. I have done a lot of research on autism itself, but I have never heard of transfer factors. I will add you as a friend so you can send me those links. Thats great that your cousin has grown into a decent young man thanks to the support he has been given. As a parent all I ask is that my son grows up and is happy. That is all. If he has a happy life then I am happy. Anything that could possible help achieving that is always worth looking into.
• Canada
6 Nov 09
I knew there was something wrong with my son when he was a baby, at 4months he was haveing night terrors and at seven months hit bit himself through the skin. He never played strange with people and was content to just sit in his stroller for hours at a time if I let him. I used to take him to work with me and he never uttered a sound he was just over a year then.But I found that because his symptoms came too early the doctors weren't taking the situation seriously. It wasn't until he needed a devlopmental assement that it was dicovered. Even after he was diagnosed I still had to fight because the daycare that he was in fought me over his diagnosis, telling me he was not autisic when he had finished going through the tests and it was determined that he was indeed autisic. Mind you they did not think he would really progress, well you know what I proved them wrong my son is able to hold a full conversation ( he doesn't understand everything that is asked but he tries) he has social skills ( significantly delayed but they are there he tries hard to make friends) What drives me nuts is when I see a parent of a child with special needs baby them and let them away with everything, those children will never learn. I sometimes see it a malls and the library even our local parks and they are amazed to learn that my son is autistic because now to look at him you can't tell unless you know what to watch for.
7 Nov 09
Thankyou for sharing what you have gone through. Those early days must have been hard, not so much the fact you son is autistic but having to fight to get it recognised. I am sure that is what puts most pressure on parents with children who have needs. A lot of the time it is not taken seriously especially when they are very young. My sisters son is also autistic and she had those exact problems when her son was a baby. I didn't notice any differences in my son until he was about the age of two. Then he would have these huge rages, he would hit his head against the floor. I used to have to hold him on the bed to stop him from harming himself until he calmed down enough for a cuddle. I just got told it was his age, but once he started nursery the differences between him and his peers was much more obvious. I have fought for a diognoses since he was four as before then I had never considered autism as I had no idea what it was. I think you are completely right in that we have to show our children right from wrong regardless of whether they have extra needs, I won't let my son get away with bad behaviour and I do get annoyed seeing parents that think its ok to let their kids get away with everything because they have special needs. I know it is harder to teach them as they find things harder to understand, but as a parent it is my responsibility to ensure I find a way to make my child understand. It just takes more patience
@irishidid (8712)
• United States
1 Nov 09
My daughter was diagnosed at the age of seven, but showed signs from the cradle. Do not, and I can't stress this enough, do not depend on the school to do the right thing. Keep on them at ALL TIMES. Don't count on guarantees. Unfortunately, a good number are misdiagnosed or diagnosed late, you aren't alone.
1 Nov 09
To be honest I knew my son was autistic from quite early on. It runs in my family, my brother is autistic, my nephew is autistic, I am mildly autistic and also dysphraxic. I think thats what gave me the drive to fight. Because I knew I was right. Mothers instinct is very strong. The school was pretty useless until the last couple of years, they have changed their SENCO teacher. The new one is fantastic and if it wasn't for her I still wouldn't have a diognoses. Her son has Special needs but she has never fought for a diognoses. But she can see from a mothers point of view the problems people face with children with special needs. Its not the child that is the problem, but the systems in place meant to be there to help them. These are what cause the parents the most stress. Thankyou for the reply
• Philippines
30 Oct 09
My sister is autistic and she wasnt diagnosed until she was 11. it was hard, she is 14 now. but it isn't to severe, she is completely verbal, and we have been getting her alot of help.
30 Oct 09
I'm glad she is getting all the help she needs. It is hard, but I believe with patience and a lot of time to give that a child who is autistic can lead as full a life as someone who hasn't got it
@borhan (1345)
• United States
30 Oct 09
My daughter, now 13 is diagnosed as autistic. She behaves hyperactive and has communication disorder. She is on medication and undergoing reiki therapy. for last 11 yrs we with this. long term medication and other alternative healing methods has made us somehow tired, but we are still enthusiastic about her treatment. Now she is in a developing stage. Can you please narrate the behavior and habits of your son? Thank you.
30 Oct 09
My son is also hyperactive but not all the time. I have found removing things from his diet has helped a lot with the hyperactivity. He is not allowed anything with artificial colours or preservatives in (E numbers are a no no). My son has to have a strict routine. Anything out of this routine upsets him. He collects odd things like car parking tickets. He has to say certain things in a certain way. I have to say things in a certain way or he wants me to repeat them At the moment any word that ends in T I have to repeat. He doesn't like tags on clothes or seams, which he especially hates on socks. When he sits down in his chair he rocks on his legs, he still chews his clothes to bits. He can write about as well as his 6yr old sister, infact he is failing in all subjects at school and I am currently fighting to get him a statement of educational needs done. Even though he can talk well he doesn't pronounce his words well and especially struggles with words containing 'sh' and 'ch'. He struggles to understand what others say to him and you will have to repeat what you say as simply as possible. At school his teacher will tell the class what to do, then it will be repeated to my son. There are many things, he can't ride a bike, tie his shoe laces or even swim, though he has had lessons and goes regularly. I hope this answers your question and thanks for replying
• India
30 Oct 09
i had the oppurtunity to work with autistic children in the school set up.so i know how you must be feeling having lost few productive years in unnecessary struggle to get a confirmed diagnoses. i have many occupational therapists as friends working in US as well as UK.the UK ones always praise the NHS of providing great quality services.all your medical bills etc. are taken care off by the contributions from your salary whereas the US system being more insurance dominated was projected as efficient but less sensitive unless you have adequate insurance coverage.so i am bit disappointed that you had to struggle with the system which is considered to be more humane . let bygones be bygones.there is still much left to do. may god bless you and your son all the best
30 Oct 09
Thankyou for your kind response and in general I will also praise the NHS. Doctors and nurses in general here do an amazing job. I think though it is different here with the autistic side of things. Having a son who is autistic has opened up a whole network now of parents who have been through the same process here. It really depends what part of the UK you live and whether you can afford to pay for your child privately. A friend of mine payed for her child privately to be assessed. It cost her over £1000 in dollors thats roughly $2000 around abouts. But she had a full assessment done on her child straight away. He had different tests and things carried out to make a full diognoses. I can't afford to pay privately, but after the long struggle I told my doctor I would pay if it meant I would get a full assessment done. He pushed the child phsychiatrist to see Daniel and do a full assessment. I do find the system slightly unfair, but I am guessing if I lived in the states and I couldn't afford insurance my son wouldn't have been seen at all
@sacmom (14250)
• United States
1 Dec 09
I'll say I did! My husband and I tried to get a referral from our doctor for our autistic son when he was about 4 years old, but the doctor refused to give us one. I ended up waiting until almost his 7th birthday before he got diagnosed. So, I'll have to say no, it isn't any easier to get a diagnosis here in the US.
• United States
11 Nov 09
Hey guys, I am really new about this topic. I am very interesting in learn more about autism. This is something that made me think a lot since I hear about it. I was not aware of the magnitude of the autism syndrome. I am been studying, researching and learning about it and I just wrote a blog about the benefits of antioxidants in children with autism. If you want to take a look to the blog. http://www.superpowerhealth.blogspot.com