To spank or not to spank?

United States
November 21, 2009 11:16am CST
I do not believe in spanking. The reason is because I think that children will learn that if you do something wrong, it is ok to hit. I could not imagine spanking my child, and then later trying to explain to him or her why it was not ok to hit their school mate for taking their cookie at lunch. I believe in using positive reinforcement, and not fear to teach my children. With positive reinforcement you respect your child and you teach them to respect you, not fear you. They learn that you are their guide and teacher in life, but not their dictator. Did you grow up with spanking in your household, and do you think that spanking is ok? Why or why not?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@ncrc15 (17)
• Philippines
25 Nov 09
I am a Filipino and it is part of our culture to discipline children in a form of, yes, hitting. Other parents abuse it and that's what I am really against of. When I was a child I remember not doing bad or naughty things because I knew that my mom would hit (my butt). My mom would not make it really hurt at first. But she would try to explain why she did it. I am not saying that I became a good child, at least I knew the reason why my mom or dad would do that to me. Now, I am 25 years old and now have an 11 month old daughter. I plan to do the same once she's older. I've witnessed how my mother-in-law raised my husband's niece and nephew. (Their mom is currently working in Italy.) My mother-in-law was the kindest person I've ever known in my entire life. Now, these kids were never spanked or hit because my mother-in-law is so kind, that she would only scold them, as if the kids were really listening. Now, these kids are spoiled brats and they never even learned how to respect elder people.
@babshish (1389)
• India
23 Nov 09
Hi, Even I am against spanking. Whats the use of doing such thing, instead we can tell them politely and try to make them understand what is right and what is wrong. Their minds are very sensitive and also they grasp things very quickly. Yeah sometimes happend that we are unable to tolerate and in anger we beat them, but instead we should keep our mind cool and think like a mature person, that they have not done that thing knowingly and we as a parents need to tell them and make them understand what is wrong and what is right. I never beat my child, but ofcourse sometimes I scold him that also very rarely. Most of the times I try to talk with him politely and help him to understand about right and wrong things.
@ram_cv (16513)
• India
22 Nov 09
I agree with you that spanking is not good for children. But sometimes when despite many warnings my son does not listen, then I do occasionally give him whack. He cries for 5 minutes and after that he does not repeat it again. I hate doing it, but sometimes when his actions are dangerous like playing with Electric cables or something like that, then this extreme action is required both for safe guarding him as well as ensuring that nothing breaks up. Cheers! Ram