Him or my dog!

United States
November 23, 2009 10:47am CST
So my b.f of 10 months has told me basically it's either him who leaves or my dog that needs to go, cause my dog doesnt like him and he hates my dog. I have had my dog for 5 years... He is like my family.... I love my b/f too though. I dont know what to do? Before I was with him I thought... Man if someone doesnt like my dog than they are not the one for me. To a point I still believe that. Plus what if I get rid of my dog and this relationship doesnt work. Any advice would be great!
2 people like this
17 responses
@djbtol (5497)
• United States
24 Nov 09
If he would give you up over a dog, then he doesn't want you bad enough. Love only when it is convenient or easy is not love enough. djbtol
@dragon54u (31647)
• United States
23 Nov 09
Dogs know the true person behind the facade. If he doesn't like you bf, it could be a jealousy issue but more likely it's because he senses something in the man that is objectionable. For your bf to give you an ultimatum shows that he is thinking of himself more than you and doesn't love you as much as you think. Your dog will always be loyal and loving but a bf like that will not. What's next? Your type of clothing, a friend, your family? This type of person is a control freak and not someone you should be involved with. I wish you luck with your decision. If you give up your dog, be prepared to keep giving up things until there's nothing left.
1 person likes this
@rhayde29 (126)
• Philippines
24 Nov 09
I would definitely choose the dog ^^
@djbtol (5497)
• United States
25 Nov 09
no, no, no! I think you better prefer the lady. Of course, I didn't think the guy had the right to say its him or the dog. But if we let him win that argument, then the dog must reform or leave. Oh, the complications of life.
@rhayde29 (126)
• Philippines
25 Nov 09
It is only my opinion^^
@Aylward (198)
• Philippines
24 Nov 09
how long have you been living together? well, if he really loves you then he should consider your feeling over your dog. I mean, the dog is with you for the longest time and a bond is already there. He should be the one adjusting and try everything he could to create a bond with your dog.
@hvedra (1623)
24 Nov 09
The dog, you have a responsibility to the dog. However, you could find a local animal behaviourist or dog trainer and see if something can be done. Dogs can often be protective and jealous and this can be overcome with the right training and behaviour (from the bf too!).
@ybong007 (6657)
• Philippines
24 Nov 09
Go choose your dog. I don't think you deserve a man who competes with a dog, which is what your case is literally. A man is a man and a dog is just a dog. Its just funny because your boyfriend is in the best position to do what he has to do for the dog to like him. On the other hand a dog can't do anything but just react on how it is treated. Choose wisely LOL. Cheers!
• Hong Kong
24 Nov 09
Hi genevakat17, Oh! It is really a difficult decision. I think the dog is innocence. As you have a good relationship with the dog for 5 years, I would choose the dog. It is because I am sure the dog loves you and he won't change. For the man, it is hard to for sure that his love can be loyal to you for 5 years. It may change. So, if I were you, I would choose the dog. Moreover, if you leave the dog, he may not find a good family. However, your boy friend would definitely find another girl he likes when you leave him. Best wishes, agonyaunt69 (3:00pm 24 Nov 2009 Hong Kong time)
@angelajoy (1838)
• Philippines
24 Nov 09
It depends on who you love more. If it were me, I'd never trade my boyfriend for my pet. But I don't really know how much you love your dog. It depends on you. Actually, only you can answer your own question. Our opinions don't really matter because at the end of it all, it is your feelings that would count.
• United States
23 Nov 09
well it ur boyfriend always wit u???? if he doesnt live wit u then u can just take ur dog outside while he s there or take ur boyfriend out side lol
@gabs8513 (48712)
• United Kingdom
23 Nov 09
One thing I would never do is give up my Dog for anyone Love me love my Dog is what I say There has to be a reason why your Dog does not like him, dogs are very smart and I trust my Dogs Instinct Maybe your b/f does not like the Dog they will sense that, maybe there is something about your b/f that the Dog senses, there is always a reason for a Dog and even a cat to take dislike to a Person and not trust them I would say sorry the Dog stays it is up to you what you do, I know I sound hard but, I would never trust a Person that my little Dog does not like
• United States
23 Nov 09
Honey, if the both of you are not totally in love right now, then the boyfriend's got to go. It could be the dog is trying to tell you that he's not the right guy for you! lol I once had a boyfriend who was allergic to my cat...He wanted me to do the same thing...give my cat up. I refused and told him that he would have to go before the cat. Lo and behold, he stuck around for the next 3 yrs. So apparently I was more important to him than his allergic reaction to the cat.
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
23 Nov 09
Hi, gene. If he putted it this way, I would tell him to go! Give him the boot! If he has to put your dog in between your relationship, then he is not worthy of you or your love. Just let him go. It may not work out anyway, even if you and him was to stay together, with the dog included. Maybe your dog can sense something about him that is dirty, that is probably why your dog does not like him.
• United States
23 Nov 09
I would definitely choose the dog. I have dogs (well my family's dogs) but I may very well be taking one of them with me when I move out. And if my boyfriend gave me that ultimatum I would choose my dogs. Because quite frankly a dog loves unconditionally while boyfriends don't always. Plus, finding a dog with that special connection is hard enough. And as everyone else is saying if your dog doesn't like this guy there is probably a reason. And he may be protecting you.
• United States
23 Nov 09
If your boyfriend really cared about you, he would try to get along with your dog. He would never ask you to get rid of something that is so important to you. A person's pet is not replaceable. Any caring person can understand that. If he doesn't respect the bond you have with your dog, then he doesn't respect you. This man will probably walk right out of your life, but your dog will be loyal and caring and honest for the rest of its life.
• United States
23 Nov 09
i agree with dragon up there and also my fiance didnt understand why i was so attached to my animals when we first started going out but i made him understand i would never be able to be with someone who would leave me over an issue with them. actually he hated one of my cats and now he loves all of them and has a few of his own :)and i really acnt stress enough that giving in to a person like that is the worst thing you can do in any relationship. my fiance had tried to get em to do things i didnt want to do and i just tell him nope not gonna and he gives up and hasnt left me yet good luck i hope your decision ends up leading you to happyness :)
@shadow41 (2356)
• Philippines
23 Nov 09
Loyal Friend - Love your dogs. Stay with them forever for they will be forever loyal to you!
Hello. That is a weird dilemma you're in at right now. Still a dilemma though. Geez if your boyfriend really loves you then he should also love the things, people, pets you love. If he can't really stand your dog then he should just stay away from it. You can also keep your dog away from him. You don't have to choose cause you love them both and it's not that it's a really huge problem. If your boyfriend can't sacrifice a little bit then I don't think he's worth it. Sorry to be mean on him. He's mean on your dog. shadow41
@mdvarghese (1789)
• Bangalore, India
23 Nov 09
Hi..geneva Your boyfriend is there for the last 10 months and your dog is there with you from the last five years. The mutual understanding and the mutual adjustments are very vital in any relationship.So I can not blame you. A pet from the past five years is like a family member. As you are loving him a lot, you should try to make him understand your attachiment towards the dog. In a relationship I dont believe to keep pre condition. I hope you will settle all these amicably and will appear with a new topic about the settlement . Wish you all happinesss and the best