Decide for your loved one's life...what will be your decision?
By Jane
@jaiho2009 (39140)
Philippines
November 25, 2009 1:20pm CST
Hello friends and dear mylotters,
My sister in law needs to undergo a dialysis.
The doctors tells her,(her husband and children) about her condition.
Dialysis won't prolong her life,it will only add some days,weeks or a month and with God's mercy maybe a year.
Her children want's her to undergo such treatment,but my sister in law doesn't like it anymore.
Her reasons were...it is only a waste of money,she will still die sooner or later.
And she doesn't want her family to live in debt when she dies.
If you were in her children and husband's situation...what will be your decision?
This is really hard,heartbreaking decision making...what can you say about this friends and dear mylotters?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
25 Nov 09
If I am her children or husband. I pursue the treatment because life is very important most especially that is your love one. Who knows that God, permit her to live longer and treatment is the way God, give her another chance to live.
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello aerous,
Of course,her family wants her to undergo such treatment,but she really refuses.
Until now,her kids were having hard time convincing her to have her dialysis started.
Whatever her reasons....she is very firm about it.
Prayer is the best help i can give to her...(i really felt heartbroken in this matter dear)
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
i doubt about it dear,her kidney is in the most worst condition now.
Actually her doctor suggested her to undergo dialysis two years ago.
the toxic now reached her brain and makes her body malfunctioned,a bit paralyzed.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Nov 09
Unless I am in that position I would not know for sure how I would react
I guess I would respect the Wishes of the Person, no matter how much it hurts but I would try to persuade the Person different first but if he/she stood their ground on it, I guess I would go with it and just make their time left as happy as I can, but that is just a guess, if I where to be confronted with that much pain and hard decision I can not say for sure that I would react that way I really don't know I would want to keep my loved one with me but I would not want them to suffer either
It is very hard
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello gabs,
I know we can never say what will be our decision unless we are on the same situation.
This is very hard and heartbreaking decision for her family too,that until now they can't decide about it.
They want to give her the best they can do,but she is very firm with her decision too.And it is also hard to convinced her,and,eventhu her family wanted her to undergo dialysis,there is nothing they can do,if the patient doesn't want to submit herself...ohhh,can you imagine how hard it is...for everyone?
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
1 person likes this
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
26 Nov 09
Oh what a sad situation for all…she is of course right in her own way…she’ll die with the thought that her kids would have to live in debt for her but all to no avail. However, if I were her family, then surely I would have gone ahead with the treatment as long as we could afford it. You see the person who’ll die, wont be here to feel our pain and guilt but we the family member, if we allow her to die untreated, then we’ll have to carry on the burden of guilt throughout our lives which is more difficult that carrying the burden of guilt.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello sudiptacallingu,
I know what you mean friend.It is really hard to carry the guilt of our conscience,but,it is the concern's wish.
This is a debate in the family until now,i just hope it will end up well.
No one want's to see our loved one dying and suffering in pain anyway,but,if it is her wish and request...and it is body,as she always tells them.
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
@bodhisatya (2384)
• India
26 Nov 09
I won't give up hopes, I will fight till the end, Miracles DO HAPPEN!
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
hello dear brother,
What a spirit...i like that dear bro.
We can always fight for life,but sad,we will never won the battle,but,i know it is worth fighting for.
So...go for it!
Thanks for your response and happy mylotting always dear
@lindiebiz (1006)
• Canada
26 Nov 09
I think she should undergo a dialysis, it would be easier for her family to cope when it is time for her to die and God can heal her if they pray for her. She should have faith and she may live longer than expected
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello lindiebiz,
Her family really wanted her to undergo such treatment,but she refuses,and her decision was as firm as her family.
They really debate about this matter,but,she really doesn't like to have a dialysis.
She keep saying,she wants to do her usual things,she doesn't like to stop living her normal life and wait for her time.
This is very sad,but,i guess she also has some point with her decision.
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
@Drsunny21 (556)
• India
25 Nov 09
Sorry....yes this will be a very heartbreaking decision but wht i think tht life is important,we can make money but the life given by god doesnt come again so we should treasure tht and should try our best to make her live till her last breath...Definitely your sister cares abt them and so she says like this but i think dialysis should be continued till her last breath....
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello Drsunny,
Her family want to try whatever treatment my sister in law needed.
They want her to live and stayed with them for longer time.
They never think about the money,but,this is until now a big debate on her family,no decision was made till now.
Thu the family want her to undergo dialysis,yet the patient doesn't like it...the issue seems useless.
I just hope and pray they both agrees to what is the best for her.
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
@Drsunny21 (556)
• India
26 Nov 09
Ok Hope for the best...God will do everythng good...Take care and May God Bless you and your family...Take care...
@bucketkid (237)
• Australia
25 Nov 09
i think that you shoudl respect the ill perons wishes.
i mean, you dont know whether the treatment will prolong her life by much at all and she doesnt want to undertake it.
dialysis is a treatment that is quite expensive and also takes up a lot of time. leave her to use that time to spend with her family and not cost them a lot of money as that is what she wants.
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello bucketkid,
This is what she really wants,to spend her time with her family,and do the same usual things she used to do,rather than having that dialysis treatment that will only deteriorate her condition.
Aside from being expensive,it will only made her weaker and weaker,and that is the thing she doesn't like to experience.
I just hope they(the family)will choose what is the best for them.
thanks for your response and have a good day always
@jacksong (130)
•
26 Nov 09
I feel extremely sad when I heard your story and situation.
I think it must the hardest situation we would meet in our life,for our loved one, anything even more hard than this?
I don't know what I would do if I were her your sister in law's husband or child, I think just the tears, why?? why this happened to our human beings? It is not fair, anyway, wish her has a best time in life.
I also hope you jaiho and your sister's family be more brave, everthing is gonna be ok. And evryone in the world should do our best to work and struggle for our life, for our loved.
Best Regards,
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
Hello jacksong,
this is extremely sad and hard situation dear.
Thu how much the family wanted her to have the treatment,but the patient doesn't like to cooperate ,...so what her family can do about it?
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
@madie8008 (209)
• Malaysia
26 Nov 09
I think we should be strive till the very end. In this case you sister in law should value her life because it means so much to her family. Therefore , I would say that go on with the dialysis, human's value worth more than money. However, I suggest that finding other cure for your sister in law such as herbal remedy, acupuncture and so on. Perhaps , there are more conservative to cure your sister that doesn't made public. I hope you and your family will be happy till the very end.
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
26 Nov 09
hello madie,
Actually,her kidney is in the most worst condition now.
She is being advised to have undergo a dialysis for more than 2 years now,but she strongly rejected the idea becoz of money.
So,in this time and her condition,it is only miracle i can say that can saved her or prolonged her life.
Not even alternative medicine can help her now.
The toxic already reached her brain,thu she is still mobile,but her attacked is very unpredictable now.
Thanks for your response and have a good day always
