Why I am so negative

United States
December 18, 2009 4:56pm CST
I am so negative for alot of reasons. When you have problems with self-confidence and self-esteem it has alot to do with it! It has to do with feeling jealous and envious of other people! Thinking I was screwed while growing up and in a lot of ways I was! I still feel that way today! I get so negative when some people I know act like they are so perfect when they aren't trying! I think I do that because things seem to come to them so darn easy! For me I struggle alot to get the same things! This world isn't helping my negative atittude either! If the world didn't have so many problems that would help! It didn't help I grew up around negative parents! I have worked with to many negative people over the years,too! Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one in this world with problems! I hate when I ask for help and I don't get it! So wonder I'm so dang negative! So I complain on top of this! I just don't know how to end those things but then again this is part of who I am! I do sound crazy and I do feel like I am,alot!
3 people like this
14 responses
@coolcoder (2018)
• United States
25 Feb 10
Been there, done that, got a whole trunkful of T-shirts. For me, after years of negativity, I finally got so sick of hearing myself badmouth everyone and everything that I knew it was time for an attitude adjustment. I'm finally able to take an honest look at myself and see what I need to do to maintain a positive attitude.
• United States
27 Feb 10
I reaaly am not that negative of a person! I got it through my head I was really bad! Some people on Mylot helped me along in realizing it when I should not of! I was gullible was taking advantage of by people I never will meet and are on the internet! That is sad! Very sad! I am gratful for alot of things and I keep that is mind alot! I am not negative all the time! I just sound like I am!
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
19 Dec 09
Is this how you want to define yourself??? Forget excuses. You want RESULTS! Draw a line in the sand and walk forward never to go back. Let's start our path by thinking. You are a wonderful work of art! There is no one in the universe exactly like you. That makes you very special! It doesn't matter what everyone else does. It's what you do that counts. We all have the ability to choose what we deem important in our lives. Choose that the good, happy things mean more to you. Choose the bad things are never important.See Speak Live Goodness. It will change who you are. Do not value the material things that will NEVER make you happy. Give love and kindness to everyone you meet. Help those you can and encourage those you can't. If you give the world unconditional love, you will attract it back to you. Now, doesn't this life sound so much happier????? The choices are all yours. Who do you really want to be?? You can change the world. I believe in you!!!!!
• United States
16 Feb 10
Honestly I am not that negative as I seem. I have realized I let people define who I am. Bad move! I am gullible and lack self confidence. So I end up letting people walk all over me! By the time I realize what happen I get really frustrated and angry with myself! No matter how I try I can't stop being gullible! If I wasn't I would not like this! I would not be screwed over and over!
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
19 Dec 09
Hi there Blue, You have told me a little of your background in past posts and I do know that life has been extremely difficult for you. I know my words probably won't help but the truth is that we ALL have obstacles in our lives. Even those that appear to have it really easy, if you look close, they too have things in their lives that are difficult for them. Those things may not be difficult for someone else but they are real obstacle for them. I think the real challenge in our lives is to find a way to find peace and happiness.....that alone is a great challenge. The world is not always a friendly, happy place as you know. Also, it is not wrong for you to vent these negative feelings you have in a place like here as there may be people who can relate. It is also better than holding them inside. As long as you do it in a way that is not offensive to others, you are fine. I hope things do get better for you. Don't give up on yourself or sell yourself short. And above all....don't compare yourself to others. You are just as good as anyone else and no one is perfect.
@goldeneagle (6745)
• United States
26 Dec 09
I had gotten to the point that I was becoming the same way in life. I was judging my own life by what other people had or what they were able to do in life. I have now realized that it is better to realize what I have, and to do the best I can do with what I have. It isn't what we have in life that matters...it is what we do with what we have that makes the difference.
• Philippines
19 Dec 09
In life, there are really times that we feel like the world and all the people are against us. We usually face a lot of problems and troubles in life that cause us to think that there is no way out. We often think negatively when we are on our weakest. It's normal for you to feel and think negatively for some times but don't let it conquer you. Don't ever think that you are the only person who passes through all those problems and challenges because to tell you, you are not alone. I fully understood how you feel and as much as I want to help you, i cannot. You are the only person who can help yourself. Try to see the brighter side of every situation. I know it sounds very difficult to do but there is no harm in trying. I once was very pessimistic and I almost gave up before when i was bombarded with a lot of problems but i learned to fight back. I learned that in life, we should be strong and courageous enough to face all the trials that may come to our journey. Just keep on believing that there is always sunshine after the rain. I am wishing you all the happiness especially this Christmas season.
@carmenvj (61)
• United States
19 Dec 09
It takes so much more work to be negative. It takes alot more muscles in your face make a angry frown and less work to make a smile. Why are you working so hard to be negative? The first thing you need to do is start loving yourself. If you don't love yourself, you will not love everything and anything around you. You are your own worse enemy and you are standing in your own way. Start loving yourself and you will start to feel so much better. Don't hang out around negative people. Get away from that kind of energy. You should also start meditation. I will help you tremendously in the start of helping you to love yourself. Once you start this transition in loving who you are, you will then start to love everything and anything that surrounds you and you will leave that negative energy and people alone... Look in the mirror tomorrow and say I love myself. That's a start:)
• Australia
19 Dec 09
"Why I am so negative" Well, at least you recognise the fact that you are negative. The point is, Do you WANT to change? It IS possible! My friends say I am the most positive person they know. Did my upbringing make me this way? Far from it! Did my parents, my friends, my workplace, the world make me this way? Far from it! For the first 22 years of my life I was constantly abused in all four ways at various times by various people. My third "father" was the most evil person imaginable. Every day of my life, often several times a day, I was told I was totally evil; I was an ugly freak; no one would ever want me, so I might as well do the world a favour and kill myself. So of course, I had no friends. I had NO self esteem. I was ugly and useless and totally alone. I was completely negative - but I changed: I didn't stay that way and at 22 years of age my life changed. "This is part of who I am" THAT is total acceptance. You will NEVER be any different if that is your attitude. I have just had a look at your profile and I see a normal young lady with good views on a number of subjects. I see no reason for you to be negative. Isn't it about time you decided to take control, to stop making excuses and start becoming a more positive person? YOU CAN DO IT!
@eseomame (1146)
• United States
19 Dec 09
hi blue, you are certainly not alone on this one but as dollybaby has clearly stated, i draw a line consciously when i begin to feel jealous or envious, however, that negative feeling seems inevitable probably because of past experiences and people around us who have constantly made us feel worthless. how have i dealt with this? first, i have cut off so many of my friends and i dont know if that has made me feel better or worse... it's frustrating, no doubt. i'm trying to work on it though, i would say i'm researching, that is, googling self esteem issues and all that. i think you should try to do that too. goodluck my friend.
@lorelai (1558)
• Italy
19 Dec 09
When I read your thread it was as if my mother wrote it. I grew up around a very negative mother, my mother is not a bad person but if you ask her something she won't even think about it and she will immediately say NO. Everything is easier for other people, other people always get everything for free, other people this and other people that. I started recognizing the same signs in myself, and whenever something bad happens to me I get mad because it didn't happen with other people. My mother says that I can't blame her for being like that but the fact is that I can. Children are like monkeys, they copy what they see, so the way I behave is the way I copied from my mother. I try to be positive but the fact is I was always kind a put down in my family. I live in the family of melancholic and phlegmatic while I have a sanguine personality so all my characteristics that were much different from those in my family were considered bad. I was a vivid child, I always wanted to do something, go out be active while my mother likes to spend time in the house watching TV or just resting. I know that it wasn't easy for my mother to keep me under control but the problem is that I was always annoying everyone because they mostly wanted to sit quietly in front of TV while I wanted to play games, do something, go somewhere and similar stuff. So I learned that it was better for me not to ask for anything because at least no one would tell me that I was annoying or refuse. So now I have negative attitude towards everything, I don't even want to start anything because I know I won't get it. Everything always works out for other people but it never works out for me.I am trying to stop seeing my enthusiasm as a bad thing but for a lot of years I was told that it was something bad and it is difficult to get over it.
@ladysakurax (1161)
• Canada
19 Dec 09
Hi blue65, I am sorry to hear that you are going through alot of things. I used to be negative before. I push myself really hard to success but sometimes things don't go as I expected. I think that I might excell at some stuff but there are people who are younger and smarter than me. But you shouldn't compare yourself to the others. You are you. You aren't someone else. At least you tried your best. So do not lose hope. Just think about how life is soo short. Don't spend it on being negative and unhappy. try to throw all of those feelings into the garbage and see the positive side of things. When I feel negative, i question myself why do I exist in this world? IT's because of my parents. I have this precious life and it's enough for me to bow in front of them with grattitude. we complain about things that don't go under our expectation. you won't know until you die if you will loose or win. try to change friends and hang out with people who are positive. I strongly believe that hanging out with positive people will also make you of them. On a second note, i don't really like your friends. They are showing off but don't help you at all when you need help. I have a few friends only. i can count them with my fingers but i know that I can call them at 4am and they will do everything to help. i do that also in return. That's what real friends are about. I am sure you are a wonderful person who accomplished so many things. Get some motivation! i hope you will feel better, cheers
@kevinll (967)
• China
19 Dec 09
At last you said you like yourself, that is positive attitude. Sometime i have this kind of feeling, i try to adjust my concentration to other thing. Maybe later you can find more different idea. It is not easy to adjust. I can do other thing instead of thinking.
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
19 Dec 09
For that situation you have in the time of depress so hard to recover for that the best thing you do you must not think negative because negative is the process of bad life you haven't the inspiring attitude.
• China
19 Dec 09
To tell the truth, in my life,sometime,i also have some thing make my mood bad. but ,now, i just want do something which i like.i do not want to think that bad things.i think that the world is very fair.i no need to admire anyone.To keep upstanding mind-set to face and spend everyday.then you will be happy.Do not to think a lot if it is useless, otherwise your time will be wasted.
• China
19 Dec 09
Everything will be better I believe you can