should i let him be some one he wants to be?

China
January 14, 2010 2:33am CST
i have got married for two years, we love each other very much. but the problem is that i always want him to act as the man i dreamed of. most of the time, my request make him uncomfortable, but he loves me so much that he force himself to hold back this. am i wrong? should i let him do something he really wants? or what should i do?
5 responses
• United States
22 Jan 10
I try to give my husband and all loved ones unconditional love which is all about accepting each other and loving them just the way they are. To try to make someone be a certain way to please you would be an endless battle. To make your loved one be responsible for your happiness is asking them the impossible. I would give him the unconditional love he deserves and hopefully he can give that same kind of love to you.
• United States
22 Jan 10
we all been dreaming about marrying a prince on a white horse when we were teens - now when we grown up we do realise it is indeed just as fairy tale and there are no princes and perfect husbands, adjust to each other needs likes and dislikes take s time love considereation and care to grow together as a couple and family, and ofcours even being married it doesnt mean u have to expect another person to change JUST FOR YOU as u dreaned him to be as it willcertainly lead to a dissapointmnet, dont set your bars too high and dont expect the marriage to be an easy thing itsnever is- its alot of work and takes a lot of understanding of another person needs and wishes it has to be mutual feeling that u both althouhg married are allowed to do things u guys enjoy doing togetehr or separately:)
20 Jan 10
The very idea of "the man of your dreams" denotes an unfulfilled fantasy. Whereas the man you married is your reality. Your married him for who he was, not who you wanted him to be. I think you should be the one to adjust, your requests seem unfair and selfish.
@indahfth (11170)
• Indonesia
17 Jan 10
you better talk to each other. if you always want your husband as you want, you also have to apply the same. You also have to be a wife like your husband wants.
• Malaysia
15 Jan 10
hi xia ... just imagine what if he tried to change u into someone he wants as his partner n u dont like it .. oh dear! u might not want himn hste him for that .. u should sit n talk to him, y not give n take, think what u can change for him n he change for u ~ which means be willing to give up something u love, if he request so... cheers