Why does the person you love most, cant love you back completely?
By mdehonor
@mdehonor (31)
Philippines
January 20, 2010 12:57am CST
Im in a relationship right now that's so complicated. I loved him, but he already have a present girlfriend. He likes me though, he admitted to me, and Im feelin it. We're having this kind of relationship for almost a year now. For me, I took the risk, hoping that he will choose me. I gave evrything, make him feel how important he is to me,how I love him so. But when I ask him just some days ago, about our relationship, when I asked him if he's ready now to choose, he said, he's still not sure..he still cant decide. He said Im also important to him, but still, he cant give up his present girlfriend. He said, we're ok and enjoying what we're having. As if he wanted me not to ask anymore. What would I do? I really love him so much, but I he's not mine completely. And continue loving him will keeps me hurting.
1 person likes this
15 responses
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
20 Jan 10
I don't want to add more pain on your feelings.
But,it is very clear that...he is just using both of you(you and his girlfriend).
Can't you see the point here my friend?....he is taking advantage.
It's foolishness to say that he loves you both(you and his gf)
Ok...granting that he loves you both..but he needs to choose.
It is not right to sail at two rivers at the same time.
I can say...he is not worthy for you.
If he loves and respect you...he had to leave his gf,or if he loves his gf much more than you..he has to end your realtionship.
But,the mere fact that he is using both of you and enjoying having two girls in his life...oh...he's a two timer...and you trust him?
I feel sorry for you dear...you can still find the right man for you and not his kind.
Open your eyes pls...before it's too late.
Have a good day always
@mdehonor (31)
• Philippines
20 Jan 10
Thanks, I understand. Most people will say the same. Even my brain told my heart how foolish she is to continue loving this man. Where its so clear, as what you've mentioned, that he's not worth loving for. I will try..really try to forget my feeling for him..eventhough so hard to do..Especially now that he's spending a week with his gf out of town..im so deeply in pain..wish me luck..
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
20 Jan 10
i know you can get through the pain dear.
believe in yourself...he's not alone.
There's a lot of guy waiting to be loved by you...don't look back.
Trust your heart...he's not worth the cry...hold your head up when you met him again...be firmed and strong.
He is not your lose...but he lost you!
@jholai (43)
• United Arab Emirates
20 Jan 10
move on! that would really hurt but it will cease with time. if he cannot decide, then you decide. either you move on and find someone who will love you full or you stay with him still wondering whom he loves more and still hurting.. how long will that go? how long will you will wait? you cannot wait forever.. you don't need to ask for love, you should have it freely.. you had given him everyhing and yet he still not decided.. then, he's a lucky jerk receiving both love from 2 women.. what about your side? doing is very hard at first but if you stay it will hurt you more and deeply.. would you go that far? you have risked and he did not??? that's cowardice from him. he's afraid to loose you both because he have taken so much love from both of you. finally, give an ultimatum (the only answer is you or her) and you will know who is more important to him. if he returns to you to be fully committed.. then it's you..if not, he's not worth your love. Find someone who loves you more and you will be happier..
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
21 Jan 10
If the person you love can't love you just the same then let go of her! You can never be happy with that person. It takes two to tango just as it takes two for the love to be satisfying and fulfilling. Yes you can always love without being loved just as much but how does this help you? Let go of her and find someone who could love you just as you do and then you will really feel that love is a beautiful thing.
@GsxrKing2009 (73)
• United States
20 Jan 10
I can see this. I think that sometimes we think that we love someone for all the right reasons. But as you said, maybe we just love the wrong person. And I think that maybe sometimes we just haven't found the right person. But we force ourselves subconsciously to believe that we have found that person. And we don't really understand that we are doing such things because we have convinced ourselves that we are deeply in love with the, 'perfect person'. Which as time passes, and I agree with you, we will wise up to things like this.
@vinabee (85)
• China
21 Jan 10
unfortunely, love is not a interaction force. you can not have a willing that the equal love you give that you can receive.
and in the common condition,love is a game decided by who is being positive. if you are the most positive one in a relationship,you will be the loser.
as your describe,i think you are the loser in this relationship.
@Minella (13)
• United States
20 Jan 10
What I'm wondering is why you would expect him to love you? You started the relationship with him when he was already in one. He won't choose. If he really wanted you he would have left her a long time ago. He doesn't want you permanently just as something on the side. Plus, why do you even want him. He will probably just end up cheating on you, like he is her.
You should think better of yourself and dump him. Nobody deserves to be in a relationship where they aren't fully loved.
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
20 Jan 10
This guy seems very indecisive to me if this has been going on for a year. I can guarantee it, though, that if you "finish" with him he'll suddenly wake up and realise what he's missing and come crawling back. Do not let him do this! It will all end in tears. You are a sensitive girl who deserves better and I am sure you would find another boyfriend very soon if you did decide to "let go." Good luck!
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
20 Jan 10
hi mdehonor
sorry to hear that, but it seems that he just want you to be his reserve, he's a two timer.In my opinion, you have to move on friend, though it hurts but I think that is the right thing for you to do..It will take time for you to forget him completely, but surely..time will cure, whenever you miss him just divert yourself into anything interested.Good luck
@warwic (33)
• India
20 Jan 10
that guy is just playing with ur feelings.he dont love u or like u.he is showing u he cares about u.if he likes u cares about u how can he be with another girl.in my opinion get rid of him.this relationship gonna give u nothing but the pain.belive me its gonna hurt so hard.i have experienced it in my life
@GsxrKing2009 (73)
• United States
20 Jan 10
The reason why the person that we love most, sometimes cannot love us back completely, is not because of ourselves. And it's not entirely their fault either.
Sometimes we do love someone back completely. But we don't know how to show it and are afraid of commitment. We ask ourselves,"What will happen if we tell them the truth?"
@kathleent (29)
• Canada
21 Jan 10
I have the same situation, sort of. It is very hard. I have met this man's girlsfriend, and she is a nice girl, I but love him so much, I want him to be mine. The only advice I can give, is, if it is meant to be, one day it will happen.
@arystine (1273)
• Philippines
20 Jan 10
Hi mdehonor. I'm sorry but I think your boyfriend is a two-timing jerk. I understand your pain, but it's unfair for you if you keep believing that he loves you. I'm sure he loves you but not enough to be faithful to you, to be yours completely. You don't deserve someone like him. You deserve someone who will parade you around and shout to the world that you're his girlfriend and that he's madly in love with you. You don't deserve to be second best, to be a secret girlfriend. I know it will hurt you if you leave him, but it will hurt even more if you continue with that kind of relationship. If he loves you, then he will choose you over his girlfriend. He will make things right. If he lets you go, then he's not that in love with you enough to risk losing you.
