Jealous boyfriend...
By Trojin
@Trojin (187)
United States
January 25, 2010 9:22am CST
That's me. I'm the jealous boyfriend.. I'm the insanely jealous boyfriend who wishes he could punch at least one guy in the face right this very second and quite possibly every other second of the day. You see... I live 66.5 miles away from the lady I love and I have no way of getting to her on my own. No bus, no car. Nothing... It's hell.. I don't really want to explain why I hate this guy because it would take too long and I'm suppose to be doing school work right now.. but I will ask who else out there is a jealous lover? Boy or girl. It doesn't matter as long as you understand how I feel.. And if you are a jealous lover like myself, what have you done because of that horrible jealous feeling in the pit of your stomach?... Do you even feel the pain? My stomach tightens up whenever I feel jealous...
2 people like this
6 responses
@Trojin (187)
• United States
26 Jan 10
Uh... thanks a lot. I know she would never cheat on me. That's not the way she is. Not even a little. We've been together for five years and we've both expressed how much we dislike cheaters and that we would never do that to each other. She makes me the happiest person in the world. It's my own fault that I'm jealous.. I get jealous because I live very far away from her and it's been a long time since I saw her last.
Honestly, she's worth the worry I feel. Cause always in the end, as if she just knows even when I don't tell her, she comes out and tells me how much she loves me and how happy she is she met me. Happened yesterday.
I feel pain because I love her... that sounds weird, but I hope you get it.
@divineathena (1746)
• United States
26 Jan 10
Both me and my boyfriend are jealous. My notion was that if I can stay without being friends with any guy why can't my boyfriend do the same. His notion was that how on earth he would take his girlfriend seriously if she had to talk to a bunch of guys. Our viewpoints matched and that is why we are in the relationship. We don't do ours of interaction with people of other genders and thus we just don't have any trust issue or argument in our relationship.
@divineathena (1746)
• United States
27 Jan 10
We don't control each other. He doesn't like to be with other women because simply he hates "women" except me. And he always had to use a swear word while refering to a female he is talking about with me. I am like him also. I don't need friends of opposite gender. Overall, its because of this we are in a happy relationship. We have nothing that needs to be controlled.
@Trojin (187)
• United States
26 Jan 10
That sounds extreme to me... I would never try to control who my girlfriend is friends with or what gender she's friends with.. I trust her far more than that. Now, if a guy was a total a$$ or a punk or... you know, an idiot and a jerk; yeah, I would warn her about him. I did warn her.... Anyway, that's silly. I don't want to control her. I love her.
Hately, too, listen to this. I would never try to control my girlfriend. She's the greatest person in the world to me and if I tried to control her... well.. she might leave. She wouldn't be her anymore. She'd be.... I dunno. A puppet? Maybe that's extreme to say.. but still.
Most of my friends are girls. Always have been. Can't explain why.
@chippster (67)
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
it seems like you are not jealous. You seem to be just anxiously missing her to the point of paranoia. no quick fix i suppose. Best thing would be to always have an open line of communication despite the distance and just trust her. and for the meantime, distract yourself by trying to improve further other aspects of yourself so you could always present a better 'you' when you chance upon seeing each other again. try to always be aware to not get overpowered by your negative feelings and just channel it to something constructive.
Maybe you could get into weight training and build up those muscles so if ever you choose to punch out the guy you think you hate, the 'POW' would really have an impact! just kidding.
stomach tightness is anxiety. don't forget to breathe.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
26 Jan 10
trojin you are setting yourself up for real trouble because this is a symptom of what happens when a man thinks the woman he loves is his possession. from this comes the horrid person known as a wife batterer. it all starts from jealousy. this is rather a foolish emotion as you cannot control or own another human being. I would grow up and finish my education first before worrying about my lady love. I was jealous at times of my husband but its an ugly emotion and its not really love but control you are seeking and you cannot control other people.but trojin you can learn to control yourself before you land in jail for hitting someone.thats called assault and is a crime. To begin with does this lady know you and how does she feel about you? take it easy and grow up and mature a bit. jealous is really an ugly emotion.
@Trojin (187)
• United States
26 Jan 10
First and foremost... I would never lay a hand on my girlfriend like that. Or any other women for that matter. Not ever. Not even if they were kicking my own butt. Goes against everything I believe in and have believed in all my life. I know wife beaters have probably said things like that before, but that's part of my code. I don't take very much seriously; women beaters are one of the things I do take seriously, however.
Second. We've been with each other for five years. She knows me better than anyone else in the whole world honestly. I know she loves me very much. In fact she told me last night how much she loves me and how happy she is that she met me.. I can't understand why she's happy to have me, but I'm damn happy she wants me.
I actually have very great control over myself, especially when angered. I used to have a horrible temper when I was younger and I hated it.. I hate that I have a temper inside me even now, but I have learned to control it better than anyone else in my family does. Better than anyone I know.
Things I can let roll off of me. I use my words rather than my fists no matter how tempting it is to hit something. I would hit this one guy, if he provoked me, but trust me.. ma'am or sir.. I would never lay a hand on my girlfriend no matter what she does. My words are stronger than my fists.
@gambamarcela (1012)
• Philippines
27 Jan 10
I think I'm a jealous type but I don't resort to destructive actions. I just cry. Yours is pretty dangerous. Be cautious of yor temper or you might end up losing the one you truly love. Jealousy is innate in every intimate relationship but you need to moderate it. Dont go too far to the extent that you would hit and/or kill somebody. Jealousy comes from lack of trust. Trust your lover.
@Trojin (187)
• United States
28 Jan 10
I guess I should read over what I typed.. because I really didn't think everyone would consider me to be a very violent person. I don't remember what I said though and I don't really want to read it again at the moment though..
Really.. I'm not a violent person. I'm actually quite gentle and nonviolent. A pacifist almost.. Almost.. If you had read my earlier responses, you would have noticed that I do control my temper. Or you would have seen that I explained that.. I used to be very angry.. I used to get pissed off to an extreme level when I was younger. My family was scared of me and I was only a little boy.. But I have control over myself now. I don't get angry very much at all. Usually I just let things roll off of me or try to forget about it when I get angry or upset.. If it wasn't about my girlfriend I wouldn't care about much at all. You see, she set me free a long time ago. I trust her with my entire heart and soul. She's the one person who makes me feel real and loved.. She gives me a place..
I do moderate it as best as I can. And I do cry, too.. sometimes nightly.. It's difficult living 66.5 miles away from the one you love with no way of getting to her and having her around so many guys that you just wish you could scare the pants off of.. I believe my words are stronger than my fists. Sure. It'd be nice to let loose on one of the guy friends she has specifically... but I wouldn't do that unless he truly provoked me..
My love and I have been together five years.. and we've only ever had each other... Just hurts to know that she sometimes wonders what it would be like to be with another guy.. Yes. I want her happiness.. but it still hurts. Makes you angry inside...
Why am I saying so much here? I don't know.. I'm sorry.. Maybe I just needed to say that to someone..
@cloud31 (5809)
•
27 Jan 10
hello Trojin,jealousy is just normal to lovers it can also be define as Love sometimes if its not express in wrong way, my boyfriend also a jealous type but he tried to change himself because every time he argue with me about his jealousy I end up like want to give up i want to stop our relationship since the last time we argue he realized that he should trust me, now i am happy though sometimes he cannot really help not to jealous but he can control himself and every time his jealous i keep reminding him what we've been through as if i don't really love him i may not keep him after all these years, as we are miles away from each other .Trust is very important, try to find yourself a trust to yourself and to others.
@Trojin (187)
• United States
28 Jan 10
That was actually somewhat helpful, Cloud31... Somewhat.. How far away do y'all live? I wish it were as simple as that for me to stop being jealous.. Even though I trust her, I can't trust any of the guys there.. I'm not even real sure what she'd do if this one guy decided he liked her. She told me herself she'snot sure what she'd do, so.... I dunno. It's hard, but I try to control my jealousy.. I do very well at it in fact..
