how does your mother in law irritate you?

Philippines
January 26, 2010 1:32am CST
i am blessed with a good set of parents in law. we are staying with them, and i can say that they are very giving and patient with us. however, in the course of everyday interaction, there may be times when things get a little heated. we don't fight, but like voices are raised and we get irritated with each other. if ever there is anything that irks me, is when i get constantly reminded about keeping things straight. my mother in law is a stickler to neatness and she wants the house arranged in a certain way. our house is not exactly kept because we just have so much stuff, but she wants order. whenever she reminds me, and i believe she is just really reminding me to tidy up my stuff. in her good heart, she does not really mean to nag. but sometimes, when i am already bothered with something, keeping things neat and tidy is my least priority. i also try to keep a semblance of order in our room. i don't want things to be messy. i appreciate seeing empty tables because the stuff were stashed somewhere safe. i don't like to see things left on the table. but sometimes, it is not my priority, especially if i have a project or something, or like i am taking care of my baby. well, how about you? what irks you in connection with your inlaws?
4 people like this
11 responses
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
26 Jan 10
Hi, spoiled311. Don't even go there with my mil!! I have a heap of things that I can say about her that irritates me to the core! But, I will be very brief this time... My mil gets on my nerves when she brings up things that she knows that I already know. She will bring them to my attention to see what my reaction may be. And she also does it to to silently let me know, that she knows that I am aware that she is just trying toirk my nerves! It is like she is playing some kind of sick game with me. I don't like when she does to me, it is annoying and silly. This is one of a million things that my mother-in-law does to irritate me. I am glad that she is not a neat freak. I am the one who is. I get irritated with her, because I never hardly see her sweep her floors or clean her house like other normal women do. She is not handicap, she can move around..
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
26 Jan 10
And yes, I have lived with my in laws for five years. Then last year, I lived with them for another four whole months... It was h***!
@tlb0822 (1412)
• United States
27 Jan 10
Well when I first had my daughter my MIL seemed to feel that everything I did was wrong. Whether it was feeding her, changing her, getting her the right clothing. I was simply annoyed, and told her I no longer wanted her advice or opinion. For awhile she was on my back about every single thing, until oneday she came to my house and completely tweeked on me for something I hadn't done or known about. Needless to say I told my husband that I wasn't going to stand in my own house and be insulted by my MIL. In turn she later apologized, after my husband told her, she was not to speak to me that way.(yay hubby :)...It's been a year since she has really nagged me or spoke to me in a way that was condesending (SP?). We now work together, and get along better then ever, which is surprising. We have a good work relationship, and are actually having a good family relationship too. Soo so far so good. We'll see how it continues. :)
@junmae (1591)
• Philippines
27 Jan 10
My partner and I are not married yet because of financial problem, we are still saving for the coming baby. Though we are not married yet, his mother together with his family, doesnt like me. I dont know what are there reasons why they didnt like me because they didnt even see me in person. I belive that they think that I ruined there child's life because my partner was not yet graduated from college. I dont like them either because I dont want to push my self into them.
@sublime03 (1810)
• Philippines
26 Jan 10
I have to say her voice was made to irritate a lot of people. She can be super nice but when she is in the mood to just get mad at about every little thing then she comes of to me as one irritating monster-in-law. I have to say she has been nice for the years I have stayed here but it does not mean she does not like me or what not. I just want to be real and so I would rather just stick to my old self and just be observant.
@cutepenguin (6455)
• Canada
26 Jan 10
Mine is just irritating in that everything must be about her. She has to be the centre of everything and while sometimes she genuinely has problems, at other times it's just an attempt to get attention. I'm tired of it: it has damaged my husband's relationship with his sister and made it impossible for him to have a normal relationship with his dad. For heaven's sake, he can't even turn his cell phone off while he's at work without his dad lecturing him about how it's rude to not answer your phone.
@rsa101 (18649)
• Philippines
26 Jan 10
We used to lived with my mother in law and yes sometimes they become naggers but fortunately she was not that buggy. My wife(her daughter) is the one that she nags constantly and the two seems to be constantly in friction with each other. But I guess about 4 years ago she passed away. We are now living on our own and somehow there are things that we miss about her. She was a good watcher for our son before and now we all tend to our son already. Sometimes we only realize and appreciate those little things that we seem to take for granted.
@reymon07 (48)
• Philippines
26 Jan 10
Althougt you are in all your right yo be irritated,I think Changing now if she does not accept and continues to go in your house,if you change a locks and tell you mother in law about it.
@cloud31 (5811)
26 Jan 10
Its just normal to get irritated living with in laws and your mother in law so far is great helping you tidy up things as some of the mother in law never did any of those as you mother in law did to you, to prevent irritations between you and your mother in law try to make it normal once she tells you about messing up,stay close to her saying you do the it later and have her feel comfortable don't wait for her to remind you again, do your promise tidy up things so your mother in law will feel you care about her feeling.. If you still feel things get worst then try to find a way to know live separately with your in laws as living alone with your family then you will find the difference having no irritation at all times, but don't get me wrong having ease in mind without considering your in laws..
• Poland
26 Jan 10
I was married for about one year and a half. At first, I had a good connection with my mother-in-law. She always say something nice about my cooking, my working habits, my beliefs. She doesn't change her good thinking about me. Until, i found out that, it was only for show. She didn't like me at all. And the worst thing, i only learned it from the concerned neighbor. She said that I am a good for nothing. She criticized my income,that I don't deserve her daughter. Honestly, I am only earning just enough for us to live well,and no more excess for them. She wanted to have her part from my salary. Aside from that, she told my neighbor that i am dirty on our home. She dislikes everything about me. And now I am planning to move to another place, may be nearer to my workplace and away from my in-laws.
• Malaysia
26 Jan 10
hi i) my MIL negative comment when i wear 3/4 pants which is up to my knees ~ when ~ he daughters (they r more then10 yrs older then me) wearing shorts, above in knees, wear sleeveless blouse (i dont like sleeveless)- now days i only use long pants in their house ii) my MIL calls out to me to make tea while her daughters seat in front of her watching tv iii) my MIL told my husband not to allow me in top position $$$ iv) my MIL adivising me not to eat or listen to my mother as they mean bad v) my MIL sending us out of their house at 12 noon from their place to visit my mother n be back for dinner (when the drive to my home is 2 hours from their home) i am lucky i am at the city far from their place to go tru this everyday of my life..but my husband just got a house n wants us to move in together at the city ..i told my husband that i will never sell my apartment as i need a place to run ..
@bettydeng5 (1709)
• China
26 Jan 10
Many people have the generation gap between parents in law, they have different life style, opinion etc. Different family have different kinds of parents in law. We can't require our parents in law have the same opinion with us, but we can change and control our emotion when the parents in law have the friciton with us in life. Like me, I once felt very despressed to live together with them, they are saver man, they didn't waste one cent in life, however for me, I like to buy socks often, and like to buy beautiful dress,sometimes, they thought me to waste money. We caused big difference to treat life, which made me very annoy. Slowly,I tried to understand their situation under that hard life condition, and I slowly accepted their thoughts to treat life. Now we got in good relation.