do you believe that being single is by choice?

single  -  the image shows a girl sitting lonely in a place .
India
February 12, 2010 5:06am CST
do you think that people who stay single choose it because they want to be single or they do it because they cant find a person to get into a relationship. i think most people are single because they dont find ther right person . if you say that you choose to be single why you to choose to be single?
7 people like this
53 responses
@gwoman2 (711)
• United States
12 Feb 10
Hi Dilipmiester, I choose to be single...no doubt about it! I have been single now for a bit over 20 years and I love every minute of my life...I live for my daughters and I love not having to do for a man or woman if that were the case...I do for my daughters and myself and I do all I can for my community. I am happy! We can get into the reasons why I choose to be single but I believe they're obvious...Never had a good relationship...don't know why and don't even care:-) What's done is done and over and I'm glad of it...my experiences have made me a better person and a good Mom! At least I think so I hope my daughters agree! People are people and they're gonna do whatever floats their boat! LOL Good post Dilipmiester, thanks! ~G~
1 person likes this
@gwoman2 (711)
• United States
12 Feb 10
Just another thought to share with you...Have got to tell you Dilipmiester, it's funny, just this AM I was on Face Book and saw a coworker of mine...he's got the life of a fairy tale...wife, children, grandchildren, a home, and $$$$$, he also is a pilar of our community involved in many helpful programs...and I began thinking...only for a minute though...Why didn't I ever have this? Why didn't I ever have a good lasting relationship? What is wrong with me? Well, I answered my own questions...not a minute later...I am who I am and that's just the way it is...It is what it is...nothing more, nothing less!! I'm satisfied with my own response...I think that's all that matters!
@jdyrj777 (6547)
• United States
16 Feb 10
I choose to be single!!!!!!!!!!!! Not because i cant find anyone!!! Ive had many offers of marriage, live-in, and/or relationship. I choose to be single because i do not like all that togetherness crap!!!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Feb 10
I guess, it can be a choice for some people but not for everybody. Some chose to be single to enjoy freedom. Or, maybe because they want to focus more on other things rather than love and relationship. I know one person who is beautiful and attractive. When we were still in college, she used to have a lot of suitors but then she took all of them for granted. She explained that she was not yet ready that time. She wanted to be single because that was a promise she made to herself, that she will stay single until she graduate from university, and she really did. But I also know some people who remained to be single simply because there are no men who court her. It is sad but it's true.
@Ravenladyj (22936)
• United States
12 Feb 10
I think it varies...sure some ppl are single for yrs becuase they can't or dont find the right person but some ppl are single for yrs because they DON'T WANT to be tied down and/or in a relationship for whatever reason...I was single AND celibate for 2 yrs after I left my kids father..and yes it was by choice..I had ppl trying to hook me up and guys asking me out left right and center but I wasnt interested...I needed to get back to me and my kids and thats exactly what I did...
1 person likes this
@chillpill90 (1937)
12 Feb 10
I think that some people choose to be single as they do not see the benefits of being in a relationship,or that they have not found someone who they wish to be with. It could also be due to the fact that people have had bad experiences in the past and so are scared of being hurt again and so decide to be single so not to be hurt.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Feb 10
no, i don't believe that being single is by choice. coz im sure if you're going to ask this question to any single ladies or guys, they would say, "I wouldn't be single if the one i love reciprocate my feelings." coz i have aunts who are single and i have two younger sisters who are soon hit 30 who is still single and they are itching to get married, but no candidate yet. ^^
• India
12 Feb 10
ya what you say is a valid point .
• Philippines
17 Apr 10
yeah being single is a choice., in a catholic pratice as i have learned it from my catholic friend they have three doctrines 1. concecrated life 2. marriage life 3. singleness...but for us, for me i don't believed on this doctrine. if you want to stay single then it is your choice. Being single is a choice, it means that you didn't yet find the right person for you. just wait and he'll/she'll be coming.
@mokkka (883)
• Bulgaria
17 Apr 10
Yeah I really think most people choose to be single because even the ones who say there is nobody for them had probabaly had many opportunities but decided that they need somebody else and doing so they had missed their chance of being.I now prefer being alone as most of my friends really bother me.I am tired of men around me talking of drinking,partied,fights and football.I need the one who will make me laugh and will never let me be bored.
@darkdeivu (257)
• Philippines
15 Apr 10
Hello dilipmiester!!.I think that people who stay single is who had this situation. Some people tends to be single is just because the reason is they don't have time because their time is in their career so that they don't have time for their love life , like dating someone. If they got girlfriend it will go to break up because one are don't have time for their relationship and then he/she will not find partner and tends to become single. Another thing that we consider that people to be single is just because they don't want to be get hurt again or their outlook in life are change by their previous relationship. In my final opinion being a single in life forever is worst because you will not enjoy to become a father or mother or become grandmother or grandfather someday. I always hear this words from my friend they said that "To be a single is Enjoy but i didn't say that it is Happy"
@Acirem (55)
• United States
15 Apr 10
I choose to be single because I don't feel mature enough for a relationship(mind you that I'm 18 and I feel mature in general)
@dorannmwin (36665)
• United States
15 Apr 10
I'm not single, but I wouldn't be opposed to being single if I hadn't met my soul mate eight years ago. I think that the reason that there are people that choose to be single has to do with the fact that they haven't met the person to whom they are the most compatible. Additionally, I think that there are also people in this world that don't want to be tied down with responsibility and being in a relationship is a responsibility that a lot of people don't want to have.
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
Yes I believe. For me it is a choice and a decision to be single. I can mingle if I really wanted too but because I don’t want I remain single. I work hard for my family and they are my priority . I know it is bad to do not think about your future, to think about your personal life, but me I really don’t care. Actually I already know what will happen to me in the future. I will be alone and lonely, that is why I choose to die young. I do not believe about there is someone outhere for you, someone who will be there for you in the right time, I don’t believe in that. For me there is no one but me alone for the rest of my life. That is why I love is not my priority. And also don’t have the time for it. I need to earn money , I believe that love will only give me problems. There is happiness but that will not last for long. Yes I am negative thinker about love, but I am happy to those who have found it. I do admire boys and men to but I do not fall deep and to have relationship.
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
Yes I believe. For me it is a choice and a decision to be single. I can mingle if I really wanted too but because I don’t want I remain single. I work hard for my family and they are my priority . I know it is bad to do not think about your future, to think about your personal life, but me I really don’t care. Actually I already know what will happen to me in the future. I will be alone and lonely, that is why I choose to die young. I do not believe about there is someone outhere for you, someone who will be there for you in the right time, I don’t believe in that. For me there is no one but me alone for the rest of my life. That is why I love is not my priority. And also don’t have the time for it. I need to earn money , I believe that love will only give me problems. There is happiness but that will not last for long. Yes I am negative thinker about love, but I am happy to those who have found it. I do admire boys and men to but I do not fall deep and to have relationship.
• Canada
18 Feb 10
I know lots and lots of people who are single because they choose to be single. It is their decision, and if they should change their mind one day, that is their business. We should not push them. I think my friends are more than responsible to make these decisions for themselves, as are the rest of the single people in the world. Just like I chose to be married, they chose to be single.
@Ritchelle (3795)
• Philippines
15 Feb 10
everything that happens to us is almost always by choice. almost always i repeat. this includes being single. finding the right person is wrong the way others interpret it. i mean sometimes it is they who are "wrong" in the first place. everything in this world needs an adjustment to. i mean you wouldn't work just because you can't find the right job will you? you wouldn't stop wearing clothes when you go out because none looks good on you, right? nothing would stop you from saying yes to a person when yours and his career, personal life and emotions are both stable, right?
• Philippines
15 Feb 10
i get married at the age of 29,that's quiet late for a woman to be married but i choose to stay single for a long time than i planned because i want to make sure that the person i'm going to marry is someone,who may not be completely i am looking for,i could live with for the rest of my life happily.so for me,single is simply by choice and i believe on that.
@ybong007 (6657)
• Philippines
15 Feb 10
It depends. It is for those who've been in a relationship and don't want to be involved again because of what they encountered with their previous relationships. On the other hand there are those who really wanted to be involved in a relationship but they don't have suitors. Like in the Philippines, women just normally wait for guys to court them. If there are no guys interested then they'll just keep on waiting until they grow old. This means that they were not given the opportunity to be in a relationship.
@bing28 (3798)
• Philippines
15 Feb 10
maybe single by choice if one gives up after being fed up waiting for her soulmate to come or being disgusted in a previous relationship.
@salonga (27842)
• Philippines
15 Feb 10
I believe that majority of those who are single did not really choose it. It is just that they were unable to find the right one or the real love of their life. I believe that once a real love knocks at once heart anyone would forsake singlehood. It is always good to grow old with someone. It is sad when you are alone. A man needs a woman and vice versa. I believe that has almost always been the case. Nevertheless, I believe there are those who are exempted and have really found happiness in blessed singleness.
@thuhuong (828)
• United States
14 Feb 10
When I was single, I wanted to be that way for the longest because it allowed me the freedom to do whatever I wanted without the opinion of a significant other. It allowed me to learn new things wholeheartedly without prejudice and even let me be friends with the worst of people. I just know that when I tied the knot, it was about working together and sometimes, that takes more than myself and even sacrifice of my single life adventures. Overall, the single life conflicts with married life unless you both are open to continue so. However once kids are in the mix, you begin to feel a bit guilty for not spending so much time with them. So there's a give and take. It would be by choice for me.