Have you ever had a friend that used you?

@Java09 (3080)
United States
February 17, 2010 3:24pm CST
Have you ever had a friend that used you for money,or for something you had?There are alot of fake friends that just like you for something you got and not really you.This is sad when people do this to you.I have had many fake friends and would be here all night telling about them all.They all used me for something I had,or something they want.For Example,in school I got the job to pick out the leaders for gym class,then someone will be real nice to me so they can lead the gym class.And then after I pick them to do it,they no longer talk to me.
2 people like this
18 responses
17 Feb 10
Unfortunately I have been used and abused by several people I thought were friends. I have lent money and never got it back, given friends food when they had none and never received so much as a thank you and although I think I am an open and generous person, I have had to learn the hard way.
@alilin28 (1530)
• Uruguay
17 Feb 10
yes, is hard to learn, to hrd, but all of us used somedy and we used by somebody... is the law of the life: "try to survive on the jungle"...
• Philippines
22 Feb 10
i used to have one. the girl lost her job and she always visited me at home, not to see me but to use my computer for internet so she can chat with her boyfriend abroad. since she dont have money to rent outside and dont have computer at home. as for me its alright since i live alone and its also a chance for me to have someone at home for me to talk with. every time she visited me i even buy foods for the two of us for snack coz i also want her to feel welcome every time shes at home. she even use my internet to apply for work. and after 3 months of being like that, she found a job. and guess what. she did not even bother to visit me now, even during her free time even just to make me feel shes thankful. not even a messages from her. what a user. i really hate someone like her.
@qamarep (4448)
• Pakistan
19 Feb 10
it could have happened to me but i actually was very careful not to give him any money
@Kingco18 (33)
• United States
18 Feb 10
In a world like this, where money is the main objective for everyone. I'm not surprised by the way people act or do things, you cant even trust your own family members. Everyone is out to get a quick buck. In fact, most of us here post to get some change. For me its easy... I am a free giver, and expect nothing in return. As soon as you expect something in return, thats when you hold grudges. People do have hearts, no matter how much you think one person doesn't. When you freely forgive on things that mean "the world" to you, people pick-up on your demeanor. That type of person you are, thats the type of people you will attract. Hopefully this helps.
• United States
18 Feb 10
Yes I've met people like that in my life time. There was one particular friend who really hurt me with her selfishness and unconcern My friend was a Grad Student at USC, she lived far away from the school and needed a place to stay some nights to be closer so she wouldn't have to travel so far. Being that I stayed alone and had the room I was happy to help her out. I didn't ask for anything yet she offered to pay me for room and board. she ate my food, used my bathroom products. I didn't really think about it much until she started taking me for granted. she would only contact me when she needed something, other wise I was a waste of her time and it was obvious. some comments she made to other people got back to me. she would also compare my home to others to this day I remember me helping her out during her time of need and how ungrateful she was toward me, never did she say thank you or acknowledge what I did for her was out of the kindness of my heart. but I believe she felt it was what she had to do to survive and didn't care about my feelings
@tluanga (768)
• India
18 Feb 10
Yes i once had a friend who never has a penny. At those time we used to go to party, we need car,drink,smoke etc. We will used my car,buy drink with my money and smoke my money only. But the thing is that he was so loyal to me, so i never asked him to pay.
@tayd88 (205)
• Malaysia
18 Feb 10
hi java09, Yeah,i had the so called friends back then when i was a teenager and still had some jerk who make use of me nowadays.Those days,they treated me nice when they wanna borrow $$$ or car or other material in my possessions such as cd players,books,cd,etc....Nowadays,its still the same story but i learnt my lessons.I keep away from them once i know people wanna know me just to make use of me or try to take some benefit from me. Maybe its a human nature to make use of other people in some way or the other.I'm sure you know the song by Eurythmics "Sweet Dreams",guessed the lyrics do make sense afterall.
• Philippines
18 Feb 10
sad fact in life. this never fails to happen to each and every person in this cynical world. if we think we are all that... maybe we are just overlooking things because we have our heads all too high up that we fail to see that one way or another there will always be someone who is only using us. same goes with the abused. this i think is normal in life. what's not normal is not being able to recognize it.
• United Kingdom
18 Feb 10
Yes, once upon a time I had a friend like that! It was quite a painful experience as we had been friends for quite a long time and we were renting a two bedroom flat together and I found out that he had been stealing money from me! Well, there's no way I could have someone like that in my life. I terminated the friendship immediately. I had regrets afterwards and I was asking myself whether I had been too severe! The point is though, he was in the wrong and he betrayed my trust and I don't think we need people in our lives that we cannot trust. Now on the opposite side of the coin I have a very good friend who is very giving and helps me out whenever I face difficulties financially and I would not dream of taking advantage of that. Andrew
@cloud31 (5810)
18 Feb 10
This is very common to a friends nowadays using someone just for money,or for something else,taking advantage on you and makes friendship as their way to keep themselves close to you.It happened to me several times and i learned a lot from their cheated way, its simply annoying.One time of cheating it seems not enough they go furthermore .All they thought you cannot mend to have them out of your life but sorry for them its a waste of time having them into our life..I just pray that those people would know how it feels to be cheated and they may learned something about.. Happy Lotting and God bless!
@shattered (1730)
• Philippines
18 Feb 10
Nice question. I guess everyone will answer yes. However, there are people who "use" us out of necessity and its usually not a problem when they are our friends. However, when this is abused, then this becomes another thing altogether and should be considered a problem. What happened to you is an abuse, that is the reason why you should pick someone as a leader because they are capable, not because you know or was good to you. Reminds of the upcoming elections... LOL In any case, know who your friends are. Remember, when it all pans out who or what you were in high school or elementary school would not necessarily be who you are in the future. In most cases, the jocks in high school would work for the geeks in their professional lives. Don't pick your friends because they make you look cool or feel good, choose your friends because they bring out the best of who you are.
• United States
18 Feb 10
Wow, well, I know people that try to mooch things off me, but I don't really consider them my friends. But I usually willingly help all my friend's, and they also do favors for me, so it's a mutual thing. You probably count people like that as your friends if they act like that. .
@alilin28 (1530)
• Uruguay
17 Feb 10
i think that all of us, or most of us has one or more "friends" as you reffered.. but of course, like we have, for the others, perhaps us would6 have this behavior if somebody compared us.. we are humans, we commit wrongs, we arent perfect and we arent the same (thanks god!).. so we would search and share our friendship with somebody who valued the penny.. i dont be enter in details, but some people used me, and i use them, is not important the objective, but all of us do this... good topic to talk friend! congrats! have a ncie day
• United States
17 Feb 10
Hey there. I have, and it saddens me. I have this friend I met in middle school...to make a long story short, there was a time her dad wouldn't let her see me (from 8th to 10th grade) because I'd gotten expelled for defending myself against bullies in middle school, and he was on the school board's side with that. Her dad left on a job when we were in high school, and we became friends again, but she was so different. We used to have tons of fun and everything, but in the years leading up to the present, usually the only times I see her are when I pick her up from work because she doesn't have a ride...or to write her a check so she can pay for gas. There was even once where I gave her some money to pay for her older handicapped brother's prescription. This was after I refused to give her money for the gas I'd paid for, but I tend to find it hard to say no when others are involved. She stopped over my house to pick up the money, then we planned for my husband, me, her mom, and herself to all go to a chili parlor to have dinner that night. Later my husband and I were there...and wouldn't you know...I get a call saying she can't make it. She can make the trip for money but not for a visit. I continue to hope she'll get over it, I guess because I remember what was and could be. When she actually fulfills her promise to "hang out," she's texting other people on her cell phone...accepting calls...and I have a feeling she doesn't hear a word I say. It's actually really sad to me.
@dreamr802 (986)
• United States
17 Feb 10
my ex best friend used me. She knew I loved her baby girl (she was only a few months old when I met my ex best friend)...so I would watch her a lot and whatnot, but I was ok with that because I knew the daughter was safer with me in the long run...but when I left to go home for the summer (I was in school) I left a couple of boxes at her place and I accidently left a box with my jewelry and checkbook (instead of a box with clothes)...but I didn't think anything of it because we were best friends. Well turns out that she went through my boxes, wrote several checks in my name, cashed them and stole over $600 from me...and what upset me the most was my bf at the time and I flew down for her daughter's one year birthday and I told her if she needed anything I would buy it (didn't know that she went through my stuff she stole the money during/after my trip) and she said no...well when I went home turns out she cashed a check to herself for $200 and spent over $300 at CVS where she was a manager...and the reason you could tell she lied was she put a completely fake license number on the checks. In CT the licenses are just numbers but in FL they are with letters and mine was still all numbers. Since then she has disappeared, she left her daughter with her mother and who the hell knows where my money is. The bank returned a bunch of it to me, but not all of it. Oh well that was a few years ago and since then I haven't trusted anyone like I trusted her.
@leyisa (487)
• Canada
17 Feb 10
yes my friend..I agree with you in that there are many ppl that are fake out there and will use you...I too have had many fake friends and don't realize it until it's too late....it's too bad because I find that the nicer you are to someone, the more they take advantage of you..
• United States
17 Feb 10
I have known people who used me in the past, but I wouldn't call them friends. To me, a friend is someone who likes you for who they are. Sure, sometimes they may need you to do something for them, but you always know that if the situation were reversed, they would do the same for you. I do have one friend who always seems to be needing something from me, and sometimes I get a little irritated, but then I remember that there was a time when I needed to lean on her, and she was there for me. Friendship is a give and take... if one person is doing all the giving, and one is doing all the taking, it's not a true friendship, and someone who takes and takes is someone I would not want in my life anyway.
@Fadolf (545)
• Slovenia
17 Feb 10
Hi Java09! I had friends like that and I still have them, but I believe that in everything there is equilibrium. Because of the equilibrium I also use them sometimes, eventually everything is equal. Of course, in your case you were a bit too late because you had to use them while you had the opportunity. Next time you'll know. Happy mylotting and take care!