what is effective ? a scolding or drawing attention with a sense of humour ?

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At times we notice that the children or the students are very scared of their demanding teachers. They do their task to avoid punishment or humiliations. But there are parents and teachers who correct their children with a friendly approach, by cracking jokes and indirectly bringing the children or students to be aware of their fault. The child or a student may not accept this either asking " Do not pull my legs, what have you to say say it directly without seasoning or buttering" We find children find gloomy because they do not accept their parents' or teachers' approach and at times it leads to a pathetic trauma. The number is big of the children or the students who ruminate their past with tears and disturbed mind for the sufferings they underwent, At times the mind is like the stereo tape recorder chanting the same lamentation. Life is not bed of roses. The positive and the negative experiences contribute equally for the gradual maturation process. A happy personality is not because of the absence of suffering but its caliber is because one is trained to face life with positive discernment. We cannot recover the past but we can amend it and transform it. A victim personality always will drag behind the accumulation of negativity anywhere and at whatever stage of life. I would like to hear what the others think about it specially the parents and the teachers.