How do you deal with selective hearing?
February 22, 2010 11:51am CST
My friend's boss has selective hearing... He ignores certain warnings like over flowing of workload, not enough manpower, signature for certain document required urgently... He chose to listen to things like lunch time, meeting time, gossips, budget planning, critics to his department articles... My friend tried adding hints in her status of Google Talk, a Google messenger service, which was used in her office.. So far no success... Any suggestion to deal with this type of people? Have you encounter people with similar conditions?
2 people like this
23 Feb 10
Well, that's a lousy boss!! If i have such a boss, i will rather not say anything anymore.. Just let the company fold with to his 'refusal' to listen and do anything to help.. haha =D BUt maybe what your fren can do is, bring up the issues during meetings, or even lunch time.. And making everything she wanna complain, into gossips, spreading round the company, and that he will surely get to hear it.. hehe
• United Kingdom
23 Feb 10
My ex had this, my father has this, it seems this ailment is more common than we think and it's so damn irritating, I guess I have either become immune to it, or I tend to adopt the 'if you can't beat them, join them' syndrome! Yes I know it's not always wise to fight fire with fire, depending on who has the selective hearing problem or should I say attitude, because it is a bad attitude to have. With my ex I used to feign the same problem, if they had selective hearing over some issues which they prefer to avoid, then so did I. So for me that is what I do, stooping to their level may be wrong in some people's eyes but in others it's a defence mechanism and sometimes it even works because you turn the tables on them!!! See how they like it. Not sure if you agree on my mentality here but it works for me.
26 Feb 10
ah... how can i forget this strategy, though success rate is not that high. I will recommend that to my friend on Monday. I suppose sometimes to deal with certain people, stooping to their level will just make them understand how it felt. However, there is always this minority of bad apples that will just enjoy that low level and stoop even lower, which can make matters worse. Let's hope my friend's boss isn't like that. Thank you!
• Garden Grove, California
22 Feb 10
ksherrie I really think that as shes tried hinting around and not got anywhere, maybe she should schedule a metting with the selective hearing boss and tell him out right. Overflowing of workload, shortage of help, documents not being signed are things he has to attend to. so talk to him out right, and make it loud enough he will pay attention to her. yes and I think most all of us have been in that position a few times.
23 Feb 10
I wish it is that easy for her. I hear they have lots of meetings about it. I should have mentioned she is in the government sector too.. So it has to be approved by lots of levels before it get finalised. So I think although the meeting is in progress, permission to/from the higher levels always seems to be filtered somehow...
• United States
22 Feb 10
Selective hearing is something that can be nearly impossible to deal with. I mean, these people will hear what they want to hear the first time you say something. They will chose to stuff their fingers in their ears and not really hear anything other than what fits their agenda. They will do so the second time, the third time, and so on and so forth. It can be very frustrating. I have encountered these people and as I said, it can be nearly impossible. The only thing is keep bringing up the issue and hope that one day you will get though with them. Try and explain everything slowly and simply, so much that a two year old will have no problem understanding what has to be done. Hopefully they will hear you but these people have the annoying tendency to block out anything contrary to what they in their minds believe to be true.