There is no divorce in my country and my boyfriend has a former wife ..
By hanagi
@hanagi (390)
Philippines
February 24, 2010 7:04am CST
Yes, there is no divorce in my country and I have a boyfriend who had been married for about 16 years and was 8 years separated from his wife. Is is Ok to have a relationship with him? Would you consider this a sin? Am I violating something? They were separated for along time before we met and I have nothing to do with his separation.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@happy2512 (1266)
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
Good day! It is really a doctrine in our catholic church that it is a sin. But if you were to ask me a sin is living with someone in hell because you don't love each other anymore. So find ways wherein you can make that marriage null/void.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
yes your right, it most sinful to live together with those you hate than free yourself and be with someone you love. and i guess that the reason why people got married is for us to have a better spouse or better half, a partner for life, to share with, to laugh with and to cry with and to be with in your ups and downs. thats why god want that married. but if god saw those people always fighting everyday, theres hate and sadness then i dont think god will like what he see. as god only want his people to be free and to be love and to be happy.
@lipstick2009 (1236)
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
Well morally that wouldn't be right. He is still legally married , but for me although u can't break the law, u can bend it sometimes :).
Cause i don't claim to be sinless here and perfect.
But inasmuch as he is already separated for 8 years, i think that's enough time to know that they are not going back to each other.And most probably , his former wife has her family already.
In my country there is divorce law but it is very expensive and there is no guarantee that the court will grant a request for divorce, that is even after u have spent so much.
@zoey7879 (3092)
• United States
24 Feb 10
This is a question of moral and legality.
Obviously your country doesn't grant divorces. I assume that this is from their hope and desire of couples and families to stay together. It might also be a religious stigma? Does your country have punishments against adultery? If so, I'd back away right now. If your country has no laws in regards to such a thing, or if your country doesn't have laws that allow a legal separation from their spouse, I would be careful.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
if theres a proof that both of them are no longer living in same roof then i guess ye. 10 years is minimum, all they have to do is file an annulment case to the court with proof of evidence. its very expensive. i have a friend of mine whose been separated with his husband for 12 years and her husband also living with another woman and have kids. so what they did, they went to a lawyer and make a joint affidavit giving freedom to one of them. and so my friend got married to the guy but not here in the philippines but in other country. i also heard other people get married also here in the philippines, i know its not legal by law since they still need to present a valid annulment paper but they just keep it secretly. so according to the eyes of the people they are married but according to law they are not, the law will not know if no one will tell. lol
@Beautyfactor (1512)
•
24 Feb 10
In my opinion you are doing nothing wrong, you did not contribute to the meltdown of the relationship and they have been separated long enough now to know that they no longer want to be together. If your country does not 'do' divorces, is there not anyway your partner can get his separation legally recognised by way of an annulment or legal separation?
