i need some tips on discipline

@garmac (57)
March 2, 2010 10:08am CST
i need some tips on how to discipline my 7yo son who's behaviour seem to be getting worse each day. there are not any stuff like games r tv that i cant take away when he misbehaves because currently he don't enjoy those priviledges (our tv dont work anymore and i havn't gotten round to buying games) no matter what u tell him it seems as if he listen but goes right back to the undesirable behaviours. makes it worse am not really at home due to work so my aunt takes care of him in the mean while. am so frustrated i dont know wat to do anymore
5 responses
• United Arab Emirates
16 Mar 10
I think your son is at the right age of discipline. Well the main problem is that you are not at home. But you have to do a lot of communication with your son when you come back. He needs your attention that is why he is rebelling. See the reason as to why his behaviour is so bad. Check with your aunt the causes of his behaviour. TV and games are not the solution the problem. See what interest him and trying being with him. I hope this will help.
• United States
5 Mar 10
First suggestion is that you get your son in to the doctor and have him tested. The behavior issues may have a medical reason such as ADD or ADHD. He is getting more and more frustrated with himself and then the behavior spirals. He knows deep down inside that he is a good kid but just does not know how to bring it out. If medical conditions have been ruled out then strong parenting and supervision are the next choice. And even if he is found to have a medical cause to his behavior strong parenting will be required to help him learn new appropriate behaviors. Praise the good and tell him that you are disappointed when he does not please. Both of these actions of prasie and dicipline are necessary so that he understands what you are looking for from him. If you only harp on the negative then he will start to feel that he can do nothing to please you.
• United States
2 Mar 10
When my daughter that is 5 behavior started to take a turn for the worse, I quickly showed her how strict mommy can be. Instead of her normal things that she gets to enjoy like coming home playing, snacking, coloring etc. When she gets picked up my father I make sure to tell him that she is not to have any snacks or play and make her do her spelling, math and reading flash cards. When I get home about an hour later, I make dinner (which she doesn't have a choice)if she doesnt want it then she can take a bath and go to bed. On the weekends when all the other kids are at birthdays, the park etc, she is inside studying, cleaning, etc. She has definitely started to get the picture and realize that she is not going to get anything she wants until she behaves appropriately. Good luck and with consistency he will get better.
@charblaize (1026)
• United States
2 Mar 10
I have same issues with my son, he is ADHD, behavioral and anger issues and I have him in therapy. The best thing to do is keep everything consistent, make sure your aunt goes by your rules and discipline techniques. This is a must and major issue with me and son's grandparents. Pick your battles, think about which ones he reallys need to learn to control and stick with that one, let others go for now and only work on one at a time. Set a routine, everyday, night at a certain time, eat, play, homework. This has helped my son tremendously. Talk to your son, ask why he does these things and keep communication, is there something bothering him at home, has anything changed, is he getting picked on at school, bus, friends, etc. Is there any toys he plays with, cars, trucks, anything else he plays with, start taking them away. Is there any sports he can join to keep active and help with his discipline? I wish you the best of luck and need anything else, just email me or send me a message.
3 Mar 10
It's not easy to fix this problem once it has got to this stage. This is a good article on the issue www.womenrepublic.co.uk/family_pregnancy/discipline/ The key is to start early and establish who's in charge. But once a problem develops, as in in your case, the best path is to show your son that his actions have consequences but he can choose to avoid these consequences if he wants. It's all about making him think - "okay, I can misbehave but then i don't get to go out to play... or I can behave myself and then i will be allowed to do what i want". By giving him the choice, you help him understand that misbaviour just isn't in his best interests.