Have you ever felt that you don't wanna in to a relationship anymore?

March 27, 2010 11:25pm CST
I have a felling that I don't wanna in to a relationship anymore. After I've been separated with my husband, I had boyfriends but it didn't work. I just can't give my love and trust anymore. Or maybe I just didn't find the right person yet. There are times, mostly at night that I feel sad. But I just watch dvd and I'm fine! I have a friend, he's courting me. I'm comfortable with him, but I don't love him. And I don't wanna use him just to have somebody by my side. All I'm thinking about now is my son, and I'm focusing on him. Or maybe I'm just afraid of being hurt again. All I'm feeling right now is the love for my child, my family and friends. But falling in love? I don't feel it anymore, actually, I forgot how it feels to be in love. Can someone help me? Actually it's not a problem for me, but do you guys have felt this before?
2 people like this
19 responses
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
i know how you feel because just like you i've been a relationship with 3 guys before but it doesn't work too long i saw a lot of the same ways boys do ... they are not satisfied with one woman they love to play or hurt woman's feeling.. they are proud that they have so many girlfriends boys are all the same CHEATERS
28 Mar 10
yeah! you're right donna! I don't wanna say this, but I'm beginning to hate men! I don't know if this is right. but they are all the same...
• Japan
28 Mar 10
ups....don`t say that girl....:)we still need them:)and how if you found the right one:)and how if any man had feeling as us?being hurt and think that all the girl is cheaters just don`t close the door who know some one will come and surprise you:)
28 Mar 10
yeah, maybe you're right. but I don't think so... thank's for the advise.
• Australia
28 Mar 10
I know exactly how you feel. In the past I have felt that I really needed to be in a relationship to feel complete. But I've now realized that it's not true. I don't need someone else to make me feel complete. I often joke now that when anything happens to my partner (who is chronically ill), that I won't be looking for love any more. That I'll just get a dog instead LOL. Dogs make better companions of course, they don't argue or get cranky, they don't whinge, if they misbehave you can legally toss them outside (and they really don't mind), they don't cheat on you or betray you and they never 'have a headache' they're always willing to give you some affection. All in all, the perfect companion and much better than any human. Of course, that doesn't mean that I would be averse to finding a human companion, just that I won't be actively seeking it like I have in the past.
• Australia
28 Mar 10
I don't have a dog. My partner doesn't like animals (claims to but says they're too much responsibility). I'm just saying when anything happens to my partner I will be getting a dog. I like cats too but most of the time they just ignore you unless they are hungry LOL. You can't just call a cat like you can a dog. I guess it doesn't help when you're not in a happy relationship, that makes you more inclined to want to give up on relationships altogether. I have to say that I love my partner but with the chronic illness she is constantly cranky and I feel like I'm walking on egg shells all the time, trying not to upset her simply because she has no patience due to the levels of pain she is in. Suffice to say, my life is stressful. But it has taught me that one lesson... that I don't NEED someone else to make me feel complete.
28 Mar 10
yeah! you're absolutely right. I'm feeling it too... That I don't need someone to make me feel complete. you have a dog? well I have a cat! they're very sweet and always giving affection. and of course i have my son that is very sweet also. thank you... i thought i was the only one who feel like this. thank you so much... GOD bless.
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
3 Apr 10
How love have you been separated?
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
3 Apr 10
How LONG have you been separated?
@krisnel (498)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
it is the most appropriate thing to do to give your attention to your son. just enjoy your life being a single. dont put yourself in a relationship that you dont have a feeling for the guy. the right love will come to you in time.
28 Mar 10
that's what i'm doing right now, thank you krisnel!
@mrfdg1972 (3237)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
hi there, so,, whats on your mind right now, you wanna stay single, eating the bread with no butter.
@mrfdg1972 (3237)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
i cant believe i said that words yesterday, well anyway, i hope you find your Mr Right. If you live near Nueva Ecija, maybe i can suggest a close friend of mine.
28 Mar 10
i didn't said that... anyway thank you... i'm just enjoying my life with my son now, if the time comes the right guy has come, well maybe i'll give myself another chance to fall in love.
@saphrina (31552)
• South Africa
28 Mar 10
Unfortunately one has the tendancy to get that feeling. I have felt this, but we just go with the flow and hope that everything will eventually work out. Just relax and don't think about it. TATA.
@saphrina (31552)
• South Africa
28 Mar 10
My pleasure. TATA.
28 Mar 10
thank you so much!!! that helps me...
@DeenaD (2684)
• United States
28 Mar 10
I sometimes get to feeling this way too. I think if you give yourself a little bit of time to work through your feelings then you will know what it is that you need to do for yourself, relationship-wise. I hope will will put your son first, however.
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
I've never felt like taht beofre, probably because I'm young. However, before, whenever I say to my friends that I don't wanna be in a relationship anymore, it actually means I don't want to have someone yet, I want to concentrate on other things but deep inside, I know honestly that I want to have a special someone, and I haven't found him yet.
@iwrite (5034)
• Singapore
28 Mar 10
Well roscelcruz, I do not pretend to understand how you feel, however I think it is no just your feelings you are thinking of. Your boyfriend would have to understand your situation as a mommy and with your child. I think there is also some shadow of the past in your relationship. To have someone you trust like your husband betray you, it is not easy to throw yourself back into relationship.
28 Mar 10
Thank you, you're absolutely right! It's not a problem for me, but I'm just wondering lately why i feel like this. really it is hard. but actually I'm separated for 4 years now.
• China
28 Mar 10
HI ros,i think you are capable of loving others,you see,you are still love your chile ,your family and friends,you just don't meet right one could encourage you to start another love,come on,we know you will pull through .
28 Mar 10
yes, thank you! thank you for your advice.
@junrapmian (2169)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
Being with failed relationships really will make you think that you don't want to get involved with someone again. Don't let past relationship prevent you from getting into a relationship again, however, I suggest that you wait for the right person and the right time to fall in love. Don't look for some, let love find you. In that way, you'll be sure that you'll be happy with your next relationship. As of today, you should first put your time with your child coz' you're the only one he's got. Have more bonding moment with him and choose someone who will love you as well as your child.
28 Mar 10
yeah! that's exactly what i'm doing right now. i'm not looking for love. i'm just waiting. i'm focusing in my career now and of course having a lot of time with my son. thank you.
@umit_umit (1984)
• India
28 Mar 10
well its true a times comes in ones life when its more than enough i think that you should focous more on your child then thinking all the way round!if there will be any one destiny will bring you close to that person!
• China
28 Mar 10
Hi,roscelcruz! I'm sorry about your experience.After going through so much,you must abominate man.But i want to tell you maybe you are a litter much sensitive.There are many good and decent man in the world,such as me,hehe.And you haven't meet the right man yet.Come on!Cheer up!Your life will be more enjoyable if you try to have an attitute of seeing thing on the brighter side.Besides,i'm really worry about your son because he lives in a single family lack of father's love.
28 Mar 10
thank you edward! i'm not closing my door to someone else. i don't know... i don't know how to explain to you. i just don't wanna in to a relationship as of now.. but thank's for your concern to my son. GOD bless.
• Japan
28 Mar 10
I do cause we had same trouble i think if i am not wrong some time i met some one and i have feeling to be with him but after i go with him for walk may be one,two time i start let him go cause there must be some thing that i don`t really like on him and i am thinking if i go far will be same mistake in my life over and over again:)and so i think good to have a lot best friend but not boyfriend since i have children and own family to wonder about,but some how don`t you feel lonely and need some one to share talk even feeling and have a good time together some time i miss that i still want it happen cause when you have feeling love your life will be better i used to keep myself clean look younger control my body i know is for myself but it mean when time comes still a lot chance for us to be happy with or without some one closed around:) i do felt that way...but think of future may be i have to change my think:)
28 Mar 10
I exactly felt the same way too... and just because of it, I'm focusing on my work and family now.
@jules67 (2788)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
I am in a situation where I am totally liberated. I just feel that I am much happier now. I like being single and being totally focused of my well-being.
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
For me I don't feel like that but all you can do Is pray to Jehovah God that he can provide you a heart for not hate to love again because by loving someone is not bad it can inspired your life it is the other type of love that can't gave your son and to your family and to you your friend.
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
yeah i ve been there. but for me it wears out. sometimes it takes a long time sometimes it doesnt. everytime i think of having someone with me i also do the same thing.
28 Mar 10
yes i feel it right now. I think its called contentment. Be aware its when people are content that they are ripe to 'fall in love'. Apparently. You know that expression when you stop looking for it you will find it. You have stopped looking for it. Now stop worrying about it. Enjoy being a truly independent woman. Most never actually get to where you are. which may be why you feel out of sorts. You're not!
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
Yes there are times that i dont want to be in a particular relationship anymore. What i mean is i experienced that sometime ago. Its more like everything is fine with the both of us but something inside me is telling me that im not happy anymore, thats a big problem because if your not happy in your relationship anymore then i think you need to do something about it already unless you want to create some more problems ;)