he or she falling love with you just because you likes their ex.....

Japan
March 30, 2010 1:45am CST
Suck when i know about this he was so nice talk about this and that but every time we talk he said*oh...you are remind me of my ex...you are...so....like her,then start talking about her and their past how they are in love and this and that and what can i do is just listening him talking like singing and he look at me not just the way i am but cause he see her in me and i am not her.i am just thinking all suck you better not falling love with me in that way my lot friend are you okay with that,if the rest happen to you?
8 responses
@DuyenN (68)
• Canada
30 Mar 10
The situation really depends on how long they have been broken up for. Sometimes, exes still lingers in our minds without us knowing and when we find a new partner, we see qualities or attributes that resembles our exes and without thinking, we'll voice it out loud. Partners make this mistake many times: comparing the goods and bad of current partners with past partners; ignorantly bringing "the ex" into a topic; making you feel like you're inferior than "the ex." What you can do is first off, when he starts bringing up his ex or if he's implying that you are like her, try to brush it off with a laugh and say, "Well of course, most women are alike. I wouldn't be surprised if you resemble my exes in some way, because when it comes to men, they're not that much different either." Make sure you don't sound too bothered because sometimes playing it cool and laughing it off makes things a lot lighter on the mind. However, do note that if it bothers you, do not sit there and listen to him rant on and on about his ex. Remember, men are not mind-readers, they might think you don't have a problem with it because you're not really saying anything to him about being compared to his ex. If this man respects you as a woman and if he really wants to get to know you for who you are and not for who he thinks you are, he will refrain himself from ruining a good conversation by bringing up a subject that you're not particularly fond of. Sometimes, it's not so bad to be compared. It really depends on how he thinks of his ex. If it's positive, then at least you know that there's some qualities in you that attracted him. When guys go, "You remind me of my ex..." it's not always an automatic no no no kind of thing. Guys are not really great at expressing their true intent, so skim through the surface and look for the core. I hope my advice helps somewhat.
• China
31 Mar 10
U get it!
@daliaj (5680)
• India
30 Mar 10
It sucks. I agree with you. I don't encourage or entertain taht type of converstation. I appreciate somebody who see me as myself, not comparing me with anyone especially his ex. I will hate it absoutely for sure. I also hate it if anybody including my parents compare me with somebody. I am an individual person and I am like whom I am. I don't want myself to be compared with anybody even if it is regarding good things.
@HOW2DO (226)
• India
30 Mar 10
Well you are right.Comparison with another person is very hurt full if that happen in above case that will be very painful things in relationship.So try to make better relationship without no ex friend conversations in your talking. The main is that you will arise a doubt that person so better to avoid that person live life simple and happiness.It will also may be a time wasting and you have find a new guy again.
@judelen (428)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
Hello! For me I think is not good. Comparing you to his ex-girlfriend it sound disgusting or insulting. Frank him, or try to talk honestly to him. Be opened to him what you feel. But if it's ok for you, it depends on you. You know past is past and nothing can do be back what is before.
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
if that gona happen to me im gona use my brain in think that he was just using me in order to feed his fantasy... i will not be a stupid on that very simple situation
@myzire72 (1157)
• Singapore
30 Mar 10
You must have some kind of fancy for that guy, or else you won't sit and listen to him talk to you about his past with his ex. Well, if you really want to have a relationship with him, then it's best to tell him upfront not to treat you as if you are his ex. You and his ex are 2 different persons. On the other hand, if you do not wish to have anything to do with him, just tell him that you are not interested in his stories and excuse yourself.
@ada8may21 (2416)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
For me it will be sounded insulting. It would be better to back off if you are only inlove with me because you see your ex in me. For me its not a good factor to start a relationship.
@abirsinha (114)
• India
30 Mar 10
Yeah i agree.. Often i had been on dates with gals who said u look similar 2 my ex bf... Actually people go thru breakups and everything but in the back of their minds they cannot forget dere ex partners.. It moulds their likings.. so whenever they see a person whose attitude or looks or certain behavior is similar they tend to get close 2 u and end up saying that i like you because you are like my ex.. But be careful this sort of likings are not true.. its like a ur satisfying urself wid a pirated version of a software rather than the original one...
@Sir_bobby88 (8241)
• Singapore
30 Mar 10
Then ask him if he like his mum laugh out loud . Go find a old grandmother then laugh out loud.