Why Bother?

Hi tessah, We knows that lies is bad, but I think there are some case that makes lies going to be good things. And sometimes is needed for some reason. How can you tell the taste of foods that had been cooked by the person you loves, eventhough the food was really-realy have a bad taste. I believe you won't makes the person you loves going down, isn't right?

Trust is very essential in a relationship. But at times, a partner tend to lie to save from triggering an argument. It actually depends on the severity of the lie, but in the end of it all, it's still a lie. In loving, you have to risk if you truly love your partner but there will come a time that you get so fed up with all the lies and will want to quit the relationship to save yourself from total damage.

I agree, why bother if you can't be honest. I remember asking my current spouse in the outset of this relationship if he has learned anything from his past relationships. He told me that he used to lie to his ex about stuff and when she found out, it wasn't that she was angry about what he lied about (the reason for the lie), but the fact THAT he lied that upset her so much. So, he said he might as well just tell the truth and get the argument over with right off the bat, instead of lying, which does nothing but put the argument off and then you are in deeper Shyte because you lied about it. And he has kept true to that. There have been times where he has told me that he was going somewhere that he knew I wouldn't like, but he said, "I'm not asking your permission, I'm just telling you so you can't say I lied to you about it." I respected him for the honesty. Yes, we had a little disagreement about him going, but nothing compared to what would have happened if he lied about it, too.

I value honestly so I'd like to be honest with people as much as I can, because I want them to be the same to me. If I felt lied to, or betrayed, by someone I truly care for , I find it hard to bring back the trust I once had in this person again. It's possible, but it won't be easy.

You are so right but i think the people who are surviving with these kind of relationships want to give some chances to their loved ones before calling a quit. As we all know that relations are very difficult thing to handle so first we have to be good to the other person either it be mum dad,girl friend or any other relationship. First we have to do our part but if they don't respond in a positive way then leaving them would be the best choice.As there is no point in hanging on those rotten relationships which don't let you concentrate on your work and are made on the bricks of lie and secrets. Thats all Take care

I could tell you what I've lied about, but then how would you know what is true? :P Just kidding honey, you know I don't lie to those close to me :)

A pertinent discussion tessah.I also share your opinion and my blood boils when I see people say untruths.I also do not like it if supposedly close people make innuendoes, drop false hints and are not open and honest .I find it difficult to cope with people like that .But one part of my rational mind does tell me thta it takes all sorts to make the world and so unless they are very close people we should not bother.Even parents, siblings , in-laws , do give evasive answers at times while expecting us to be truhtful all the time.My mind would rise in revolt against such situations.But we have to get along with them if we need any relationships at all.So, we have to limit our circle with whom we are totally open and honest and thsi is where mutual trust plays a part.I feel I should interact less wiht others on a confidential basis and just stick to polite noncommital conversations if I need people at all and not get judgemental.THen I own't have nay people at all unless they totally share my thoughts an d ideas.

Hey tess! Are you just on a run with these discussions today? I am an open and honest person, but my bf is one of those that keeps secrets and lies! So, obviously it is very difficult for me to be with someone who is the exact opposite with me and therefore the reasons we have these issues! I think from all these discusscions that I have responded to it is obvious that we shouldn't be together and I don't know why the phuck we are! But, we happen to be a good "team" if that makes any friggen sense at all so we keep trying!

It's the point of growing up and learning. Most of us need to try it to learn from it and never do it again. Those that hasn't either do it in a late age or forever will be curious about cheating and what if they did it..

I agree with you but I lied for thousands times, when I was young I lie to my mother for she did not want me to play pc games