Would You Give up your work for love?

Philippines
May 27, 2010 7:03am CST
I'm faced with a dilemma My work keeps me very busy to the point where i become like a machine and just end up working all the time and when i get home i work online all these things i do to ensure that I am able to provide for my loved ones and yet... my loved ones barely know me anymore... it seems like i have been replaced by the amount of money i contribute i am no longer a person to them i do this for them and yet i am not even there should i give up work and be content with being a bum for love?
3 people like this
39 responses
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
28 May 10
I think it depends on the situation. I could give up my work for my love provided that he could support me and our family. But, I would have some type of a partime job for me to have money but no careers. My mom is like that really. She gave up her job because my dad asked her to in order for her to be able to take care of the children. She doesn't have a career but she has other sources of income apart from what my dad gives her. I think that's a great setup for the yesteryears, but for our generation, I think it would be tough to do so because you're not sure of the relationship with all the divorces going on and people cheating. What would happen to you if you gave up your ability to earn for love then he just finds someone else and leaves you?
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 May 10
all i can say is wow i love this response
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
30 May 10
Wow! Thank you for the complement!
@la_chique (1498)
28 May 10
If my work was ruining everything that mattered to me I would give it up in an instant. I make sure at the moment that I work Monday-Friday day times only, as does my partner and I'm trying to train to be a teacher so that when we have kids, I can take the school holidays off to spend time with them. I've been thinking about my time management forever. I know how important it is to see your loved ones, and if I were you, I'd certainly get looking for something better.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 May 10
hi there chipesterkan. i guess you've been engaged too much with your work. i suppose you enjoyed your job that much, huh? well,they say that your work must be your first love because it is your bread and butter. but setting aside a love life is a little selfish. i know there are some out there who would love to be given the chance for a romantic relationship with you. but you made your work the center of your attention. if you put a little balance, sooner than you think, you feel like you're the luckiest. your job doesnt need to tie you down from having a nice relationship. you dont need to give up your job just to make your heart feel happy. just explore. there are a lot of fishes in the sea. enjoy the fun of flirting. you can now have two first loves...your job and your partner. share each success with each other. =)
1 person likes this
@med889 (5941)
27 May 10
Work is important to keep life financially going and you know nowadays we do not find job very easily so if you see that at your place it is easier to find a work then you can drop the current job to find something much lighter and you can also spend time with your love ones at home.
1 person likes this
@nangisha (3496)
• Indonesia
28 May 10
Its really taught question. I think I will not give up my job until we have a baby because the baby make busy and I have to give my time to raise my kid. I think most women does not lay their happiness in money but in attention, you don't have to give up your work but have quality time with your love one don't let her feel unwanted or second priority.
1 person likes this
27 May 10
If you can afford to quit work and you are unhappy in your job then these are further reasons for giving work up. However giving up work is very difficult and you will find that being at home all day can be very isolating and make you unhappy too. Is there not a half way point for you, could you maybe reduce your hours at work to spend more time with the people you need to?
• Philippines
27 May 10
i don't like mediocrity when i see a task i put everything into it even mylotting so halfway points are moot
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
28 May 10
Hello Chipesterkhan Not give up work no but divide the time between work and your loved ones Take some time to yourself at the end of the Day no money can give you love
@34momma (13882)
• United States
28 May 10
i am trying to understand what you are asking. are you saying that you work a full time job plus work online all for your family? and when you say family do you mean wife and kids, or parents and siblings? If you are talking about wife and kids then I would say you need to work. it's your job to provide for your family. I would say that you don't have to work so much. that you need to also spend time with them as much as provide for them. of course money is important. but it's not as important as your being there. if you are talking about parents and sibling then i think you need not quit but you again don't need to work so hard to provide for those who need to provide for themselves.
@maezee (41997)
• United States
30 May 10
Well, firstly: I don't think NOT working makes you a "bum" necessarily. . And I don't think I could do it, really. I'm pretty independent, and that's how I was raised. I don't think I could ALLOW someone else to support me completely. I couldn't have pride in myself or independence if I let someone bring everything to the table, and have me bring NOTHING to it (but my charm). I don't think I could do it. I've never been put in a situation where someone (my boyfriend, or husband if I had one) "Please stop working! I will support you!" But I wouldn't give up my education or my job for a guy..Ever. No matter how much I was in love with him. I'm kind of a skeptic, because in my eyes: what would happen when you get a divorce? Or you split up, and no longer have his support? Then you'd probably be S.O.L & that's a risk I wouldn't be willing to take (we have to be realistic about this..) I think it's about compromise, though. I think that a pay cut, or a cut in hours, to spend with your boyfriend/husband or family is important. It's important not to lose touch with the people you love, but at the same time, it's important to support them and allow yourself to be financially stable. So, it's all about finding a balance between the two, if you ask me.
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
28 May 10
it surely makes you different from your other loved ones: this ability to provide for them. which makes me think that somehow they feel a little bit embarrassed that you can do so much sharing and they can't. if others' views are what you're concerned about it is not solely up to you to decide about anything that concerns this. talk to them. even if no one would verbally say what i said someone would hint at exactly what i mentioned.
@allknowing (130067)
• India
28 May 10
Can't you think of a situation where you can slow down a bit so that you have have your cake and eat it too?
• India
29 May 10
If you give up your job, you will have plenty of time for loved ones but shortage of money and than you will again think of job for sure. If you have enough money and you can survive without job, you can give up but in either case I would suggest you to balance your work and personal life in a way where you can spend time with family and friends without sacrificing at work. There are people struggling with the same problem and almost everyone has to manage this because of work culture, every employer expects more and more. I am working in IT and many times have to stay back in office late night and have to go on weekends but it should not be always. I try not to stay in office after 6-7 pm and reach home on time. We might be earning good but no time to spend money for good things and no time to spend with kids, that money is of no use. Try to balance work and personal life. Do not give up your job.
@megrawab (166)
• Philippines
28 May 10
Choose where you will be happy.. If you'll be happy on both, it's really a big problem... Can't it be both...
@xeroeight (1060)
• Philippines
28 May 10
I think all you need is to learn how to manage your time, give time to your work and give time for your family.
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
28 May 10
i won't be giving up my work because of my loved ones. but i cannot also forsake them because of my work. i need them both. i have to work to provide for them and i need them because they are my treasures. i work in the office and when i get home, i also work online. but i do not ignore them when i am working online at home and they need my attention. i still want them to feel me when i am at work at home.
@lowlycook (265)
• Philippines
28 May 10
Keep the work but reduce the work load. And since you seem like a very thoughtful person, be patient a bit more with your love ones. People tend to be like that. In my case, being a loner, when I see people being like that, I just withdraw for a while somewhere quiet and just talk with God. God will comfort you--he's the only one who really cares. Continue to love and pray for your love ones. God bless!
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
28 May 10
Bad plan. It's true a man needs to provide for his family. But it's also true that money is not a replacement for a husband or father. Relationships, whether it is a friend, a wife, or with a child, is all based on time. If you spend no time with any of those people, you will no longer have a relationship with them, no matter what money you are providing. Money does not equal relationship. It would be better to earn less money, and have a real family, than be a millionaire and have no family. You have to make a choice as to which is more important to you.
• United States
28 May 10
Life is always hectic or complicated when we are trying to give what we can for our love ones. we don't have room for our self anymore. I was once like you but I did tried to managed between my family and work. It was hard at first when the kind of job I got was very demanding. But I made it until I got married and my husband told me to stop working and just take care of the family we are about to start..it's then I feel better now! no more stress! hehehe.
@winjayoma (186)
• Philippines
28 May 10
You do not need to give up your work for love. You continue doing your job, making double time just to provide for your family. But! you should give quality time for your wife and your kids also. Remember, they do not need only your money, what they needed most is your time with them. You give time to your wife and meet her physical needs, give time playing or talking to your kids and above all take your family to church every sunday and you will be blessed more not just material but as well as spiritual!
@mady146 (81)
• India
28 May 10
It all depends on your priority. As far as my priorities are concerned, I would give up my job without second thought for love. But there's always possibility of making a balanced life where in you work and make sure to find time for loved ones. Because if you just quit your job, trust me you wont be appreciated for long.