My patient's kids are the most sickening, selfish people I have ever known...
By dloveli
@dloveli (4366)
United States
June 24, 2010 6:51am CST
I have watched several documentaries on Hoarding. They also have television shows pertaining to this illness. I also work with a patient whose daughter is a hoarder. This is where my problem comes in. My patient owns a two-family home. Her daughter has always lived upstairs. She was what is known today as a hoarder.The problem is that I dont think in her case its a case of hoarding rather than laziness. After my patient had a stroke the daughter obviously spends a lot of time down stairs. She has also decided to bring her mess with her. My patient likes order. Not only is the daughter taking advantage, but the son is a loser. Pardon my french. He sleeps on the couch all day. That is when he's not getting drunk as a skunk. He now has lost his garage so now all his tools are taking up space in my patients living room. ITs a mess! SO Unfair. This woman is remarkable. She raised five kids on her own. Not to mention took a shack and made it a home. I honestly think this woman, the daughter thinks that because she takes care of her mom she has the right. If my kids were like that Id rather have someone else take care of me. THe mother, my patient, has trouble speaking. When she tries to complain, they act as if they dont understand. Its horrible. What can she do? There all she has. It's there way or no way. How selfish some people are astonishes me. thanks for letting me vent dl
2 people like this
9 responses
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Jun 10
Me too Sid. Me too. I think these people are so worried about trying to know better than the medical staff that they have lost site of what's really needed here. The daughter is so afraid her mother will like someone else that she has literally stopped hiring people that can help her. If she does hire them she makes sure they know she's the boss. I am afraid that she is her mothers caregiver. She is the boss. I have talked to elder services and they say that every time they go in everything seems to be in order. They have to give her a letter telling her when they're coming. They get their stuff together for the hour that they are there. Im documenting it all. She has the medical staff doing her yard work. I have secretly taken pictures and footage of all the things that I believe to be wrong. Just in case if you know what I mean. Happy MyLotting dl
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
25 Jun 10
Glad to hear you are taking pictures and documenting all this. I will never understand why they give someone such warning that they are coming over. They do the same thing in cases where child abuse is reported. It just give the person time to cover themselves. 
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
24 Jun 10
DOnt know what but maybe you can get this daughter on that program I have watched it and most of them are just awful! and the lazy son could build some kind of shed in the back to put his tools in we have 3 sheds and most is full of some kind of tools in them have several tool boxes in there too and one standing outside under the patio .
With 3 people that had to have tools on job we have almost any thing ya could need but they are in the sheds.
Think I would tell thoise kids off and make them clean up so lady can have a peice of mind about it.
1 person likes this
@scarlet_woman (23465)
• United States
26 Jun 10
she'll learn the first time a social worker walks in there and sees how
she's messed up her mom's house.that's dangerous to the mom on many levels.
and if it's bad enough,the state could take her out,condemn it and they'll be homeless.
i take care of my mom and there's other family here.something sits around
and they don't pick it up,i'll throw it out.i already told them don't be s**tcollecting.
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
25 Jun 10
Hey dl! I know that you have spoken about this patient before and
I so feel badly about the fact that her horrible children are
taking advantage of her knowing how sick she is and can't do
anything about it! But, isn't there a way that you can get some
kind of State help to come in and get these hoarder/boarders
out? I know that it wouldn't be easy but in a way they are
endangering the care of your patient and couldn't you get someone
to intervene by using that as an excuse? I know it isn't your
job or place to do this, but I know how much you care (more than
these freeloaders) and I know how much you care for their mom
as a person and a patient and how much it bothers you. So isn't
there something or someone you can report this too, maybe the
Department of Health and they can site the house as being unsafe?
I'm just trying to help because I worked in the medical field
and this is just unacceptable behavior especially coming from
"family" if you can dare call them that! I remember the story
about the bed, if this is the same patient?
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
26 Jun 10
Well, I've certainly learned that being able to vent here on mylot is quite possibly one of the best free forms of therapy that is available to us. That said, what your patient's children are doing to her is absolutely wrong. Despite the fact that your patient is now disabled, her house is still her home and her children should honor the way that their mother has always lived. I agree with you that her children are extremely selfish people.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Jun 10
hi dloveli hoarding is just fearsome. I have a friend whose living room is just wall to wall stuff. Name it they have it. Their living room literally has no pathways as its taken up be furniture,paintings, collections etg. She uses a remote for her television as she could not
get to it to change anything manually. She is my best friend and very neat except for all the stuff stored in her living room. I could not
believe it the first time I came into her home. They live in a mobile
home, two bedroom size. I have never ever in my lifetime seen a room
that cluttered. NOthing is dirty it is just wall to wall furniture and stuff. I mean hobby equipment sports equipment, name it she and her son
have it in that living room.
that's so sad the way they are treating your patient, don't they know one day they will be old too? Then who is to help them, don't they love their mom? the son could be of real help to his mom if he was not a lazy couch potato and a drunk. I am wondering if you should not report these two to Adult protective service as they seem to be mistreating their own mom.
@med889 (5941)
•
24 Jun 10
When we write down what has happened it is a good mean to get relieve so I know these selfish people exist and it is so bad that we cannot change them all but we can avoid them and as far as possible we should be staying very far from these people to stay healthy and mentally fit, the mother can shift elsewhere or tell the kids to move out if possible.
