Which is important - having a big crowd of friends or having only one?

Philippines
July 2, 2010 11:31am CST
When I was a child, I used to have so many friends. Friends that I can say my playmates as well. But, as I grow old, some of them started to change. Maybe because of the attitudes that develops in each one of us. And as I reach the age of maturity, we are getting lesser and lesser. Until one day, when I woke up, only me and a friend left. One day, I try to reminisce the past thinking what is important - having one friend that you know who is faithful and can be with almost all of the time or possesing a big crowd of friends wherein you are not so sure who can be faithful to you and you cannot have them when you need them? - Sometimes it bothers me a lot. Since, I have had a not so good experienced having too many friends. Wherein, there was a time that came, almost all of them dissappear when I need a small helping hand. And now, another set of people surrounds me again and one by one becomes my friend, but, I cannot deny the fact that for once in my life, this situation was happened. So, I am trying to think it not once but many times if it is worth to have a big crowd of friends or to have only one and true friend.
15 responses
• India
2 Jul 10
I would choose to have one single friend who knows me so well that i don't have to say anything to him. Having a 1000 friends is not great but having a friend when 1000's are against you is the real deal. That's what i believe. I would like to have just one friend who knows when i will laugh, when i am hungry, when i will cry, when i would sleep and when i would wake up and so on. I am proud to say that i do have such a friend in my life and we are going to be best friends forever.
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
Congratulations for that, having a "BFF" in your life. People like them is very rare now a days.
• India
6 Jul 10
It is not like having crowd of friends or only one friend . It is only about the belief we have on our friends. Dont count the number of friends u have , only see how much close u r to them and how close are they to u . Friend wont come to all lives , only it depends on our fate . If it there on our fate , then we will have a friend like we cant express it words also how good they are. We must be lucky for getting the true friend like one. And moreover if our luck is more , we will get crowd of true friends also :)
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
it's all about the quality,not the quantity.what will you do with 1,000 friends if they can't even understand you?I would rather stick to one good friend who knows me and accepts me for who I am,rather than 1,000 friends who don't even care if I don't send them a simple message saying 'hi!'.I believe that along the way,you will lose some friends,but I don't see that as a reason to wallow or dwell in self-pity.I see that as a reason to meet new people and make new friendships.
• Philippines
5 Jul 10
hi there.. i would rather have a single true friend who is always there at my side in times of troubles than having a thousand friends and none of them are at my side when im down. Its really hard for us to find a true friend, so if you find one, tresure and take good care of that friendship...
@aliki123 (122)
• Greece
3 Jul 10
Well not a big crowd but not only one either ,two to three best friends I think it`s the ideal cause frendship needs constant care,you must treat your friends as special cause they are,their sharing their life with you.I know how it feels when I was o child I used to have a lot of friends too.True friends will stay longer that is why you have to pick the right ones.Those that support and care about you.
• Italy
3 Jul 10
I'm experiencing the same thing right now. I have a group of friends that I notice is slowly but definitely falling apart. We shared the same interests, like the passion for Oriental culture, but as soon as some of them found other interests (you can't always live in fantasies, you have to move on, to grow up), we're started to fall apart. Some of my friends started to act really egoist and childish, they badmouth about other who aren't present and act all kind when they're present. It's not a pleasant situation, I tell you. I'd very much prefer to leave them all behind and remain with my only true two friends. We remained friends even though we may have different ideas or interests, because we like to share them instead of thinking all the same. If you have a big crowd of friends which you are fond of, then good for you, but if your crowd of friends is just bonded by a superficial and ephemeral affect, then it'd be better to have only one true friend.
@UmiNoor (4483)
• Malaysia
3 Jul 10
I will be friends with anyone who sincerely wants to be my friend but I can only have one best friend; a friend whom I can confide in about my innermost secrets. So for myself I think I would rather have only one good friend rather than thousands of friends whom I may not be able to devote my attention to. Besides doesn't mean that you and your friends have gone your own separate ways, you're not friends anymore or you've lost them, does it? You're still friends with them except that you don't get to socialize with them as often as you'd like to.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
2 Jul 10
When you are young, you want to be popular. You might think the answer to popularity is having a lot of friends. If i could choose between many friends and just one, i would choose just one. It is not the quantity of friendships that is important. It is the quality. If you find the right frend, you will have that bond forever.
• India
3 Jul 10
I prefer to have one true friend other than the crowd,because friends are the one who help us at bad stages of our life.Crowd of friends are only for hanging out with and doing freaking things with,not more than that.True friends are always ready to help us and provide us support when it is needed most.
@common_man (1799)
• India
3 Jul 10
Hi Airasheila When time is good you get lots of so called friend. When you have bad time it is test time to check how many of them are real friends. Friend in need is friend indeed. When your time is good and you have lot of friends, have them as your friends, because one or a few real friends may be there in that lot. Thats what I do at least. And I also make a point to manage my problems / bad times myself without seeking help from friends, so that i can live with the illusion that all my friends are real friends.
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
hello airasheila! i would rather choose the quality of friendship than the quantity, which means,i would prefer only having a few or one friend true friend than having so many superficial friends. i categorize my friendships based on those i hang out with sometimes, enjoying their company, sharing some laughs and stories. these friends i don't really trust my secrets with. then i have friends who i really spend time with, just for the fun and camaraderie we share. these are my friends whom i will entrust my life with. it doesn't matter if you only have one friend, as long as that friend will stay with you for better or for worse, in joy and sadness, in sickness and in health. I dare say that genuine friendship is also a marriage, a union of souls who maybe different from each other but who understand each other or tries to understand. friendship is when you may not understand a friend but still you are there by her side, not leaving her.
• India
3 Jul 10
Its not the question of many friends or some friends.Friends may be many but only one will be close to us.That close friend will be true to us and vice-versa.In Friendship Expectation will not be there so it will go on for ever.Even if we knows our close friends weakness we never take advantage and that is friendship. For me friendship plays a vital role not only before marriage also it will go on for ever. Tks for the article :)
@malihat (216)
2 Jul 10
I would definitely prefer to have one friend that I am close to, and can share things with rather than a big group of friends that I am not close to and don't feel comfortable sharing things with. I have a small group of very close friends and feel blessed to have such amazing people in my life :)
@greygoo (795)
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
i think the experience of having many friends when you were young is not unique to you. i had a lot of friends before, but as we grew up we realized our differences and things weren't the same anymore; bottomline, we stopped meeting. but i'm glad i have friends who stayed. i have 3 wonderful people with me who's been around since primary school. it's not a big crowd, but we can make a hell of a party when we meet:-)
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
I prefer having a few friends but the ones that are for real and for life. What good is it having a lot of friends when the are not real? I guess when we look for friends we all look for someone we can rely on, someone we can trust, someone we can share a laugh with and even the mundane things of this world.