My Mom's Addicted to FB
By gems
@mykmari_08 (2464)
Philippines
July 10, 2010 11:35am CST
It's quite revolting for me to see my mom has become so addicted to Facebook. My youngest sister created that account for her a few months ago, upon her request. And I didn't know that it would cause a lot of trouble for us now.
Back when she still isn't overindulging in that site, particularly in Farmville section, she had more time to attend to more important tasks.
I'm not saying that she has to work everytime or all the time; but I see that now, she even gets easily angered by some disturbances while she is on FB. In particular, she gets irritated when her grandchildren (she has 2) nudges her. The two children are a girl who is 4 years old and a boy who turned 2 this year. The girl is my daughter while the boy is my nephew. The former is already going to school and she doesn't need much babysitting anymore.
I don't expect her to babysit for both of them and I also acknowledge the fact that she is already in her prime years (early 60s) but at present, I do have a daytime job. So I'm also quite busy and preoccupied with a lot of things. I just wanted her to finish her tasks first before surfing the internet. It has been months since his nanny left because of a lot of tasks and searching for a replacement is quite difficult because my nephew is obese already.
2 people like this
15 responses
@doulaworks (1079)
• United States
12 Jul 10
what task does she need to finish? baby sitting? I am not sure I follow everytrhing you are saying here. I too spend a lot of time online, facebook and farmville etc. I rasied my kids, I love my kids and grand kids, but I sepnd time when I feel like it with them. some times we "nana's" just need to find what our passion is. farmville is fun and relaxing. she will get board with it at some point and find other tings to do and tehn maybe go back to it. I understand that people don't understand, I make no apoligies for my computer time. I raised 5 kids and worked for many years. Now it is ME time.. I go out when I feel like it, and if I don't I saty home. are you saying it is your mom's fault your nephew is obese? is she rasing him? I am not sure I follow what you are saying. tell her how you feel, but understand she raised her kids and they grand kids will be in school and with parents, and she might get lonley and have made friends on farmville. go granny!
@mykmari_08 (2464)
• Philippines
8 Dec 12
Now it's not Farmville anymore, but at this particularly late hour of 10 pm, she's still playing Bubble Safari; instead of enjoying a night's sleep.
And, just like you said, it's really irritating. But with my mom's case, she doesn't visit any other sites in the net, just FB. That's how addicted they (she and her sister) are.
@ongtina (1232)
• Singapore
11 Jul 10
Your mom hasn't a time for herself when she's caring for you and your siblings so that you all can grow. Now that you're grown, she's not to have her time as she's expected to be caring for your and your siblings children. Now, that should be your and your siblings' job, your turn not to have time of your wishes, but her turn to have her time(before she leaves this world) so to speak.
What you can consider is to employ a live-in maid, who can handle all household chores, take care of the children as well as have the meals ready on the table when it's meal-time. And with your mom's presence, you have no worries that things will go out of hand as your mom will be there to oversee and resolve problem should one arise. Finance shouldn't be a problem since you can share with your siblings if the maid is put at your mom's place, just like the way the children are.
Let your mom have her time to enjoy and also lighten her load by having another to do for her --- maid.
@mykmari_08 (2464)
• Philippines
19 May 12
What you say is really ideal and I know you mean well. But there are some points I have to clear.
First, she wasn't able to take care of me (in particular) ever since I was 5, because she chose to send me to a faraway school; so I lived with my aunt and her family, against my will.
Next, about the live-in maid, we already had several of them. Had, because they are not here in our place already. They have resigned mainly because they couldn't take the negative attitude of my mom's youngest sister (who is staying with us). We would like to send her home & even told our mother outright but it's our mother who seem to be against the idea. We don't have any choice.
For now, my mom has limited her FB account because of chores & fatigue.
@UmiNoor (4483)
• Malaysia
11 Jul 10
This is new to hear - an elderly mom addicted to Facebook. I think she must have a young streak in her heart to be addicted to Farmville. I guess you must be blaming your sister for getting her hooked on Facebook.
Do you know that psychologists have created a disorder for those addicted to Facebook called Facebook Addiction Disorder (FAD)? As such I think it should be treated like any other addiction.
Your mom has to first admit that she has an addiction and want to quit. Otherwise, forcing her to quit Facebook will make her go into withdrawal symptoms and all that is related to quitting an addiction.
I hope you'd be able to talk to her about her addiction and the effects it has on your family. I wish you the best of luck.
@mykmari_08 (2464)
• Philippines
19 May 12
Thanks for the advice. And also for the information that there is already a term for the FB addiction. It's the first time I've heard of it, actually!
She seems to have realized that it's getting negative already because of what she's doing.
Thanks again.
@wahsher (175)
• India
10 Jul 10
Everything should be in control, if we do it excessively it can be dangerous. After few days she may feel bored or depressed if she not get a chance to visit facebook by any reason. You need to talk to her to control this habit. Please let her do it only 2-3 hours daily maximum. Tell her that the family is more close and important to her than FB. Her grandchildren want to spend time with her. I wish you mom will soon manage to control it.
@mykmari_08 (2464)
• Philippines
19 May 12
Sorry for the late response.
My mom's FB time at present has decreased greatly and I'm quite thankful for that. Somehow, maybe she has realized that it's not a positive move to be addicted to FB.
@rhodzptc (1317)
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
She's your Mom at least you could raised to her your concern maybe in a matter of asking favor but never mentioned about lessen the time in internet surfing but instead ask her this way "Mom, I may ask you a little favor blah, blah, blah in return I'll teach you some new tricks in Facebook" do you think this would work?
@mykmari_08 (2464)
• Philippines
19 May 12
You're right, she's my mom; but there's a little problem here. I'm not so close with her because we weren't together ever since I was 5. I started schooling at this age away from her. Actually, she chose to send me to a far school where I had to live with my aunt & her family. Our distance (my mom & I) was 5 hours away. I only get to see them during vacation.
To make it short, there are some things we have never undertook together or some issues we can't speak of with each other. I guess her absence at my side when I was young caused that.
Thankfully, she has limited her FB time for just 3 to 4 hours now.
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
16 Jul 10
very similar to what happened to my wife. frankly, she knows nothing about computer and the internet. when we still don't have internet connection, all she can do is play solitaire. but when we have our own connection, she steals some of my time that i have to get online. she also have an account on FB and she stays longer when she learned about the games there. but in fairness to my wife, she only use the laptop, play games on FB, after all the choirs have been done.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
30 Nov 10
Hello mykmari
,
Well, my mom has addicted to facebook and online games as well. every since my niece made an account for her, she had been in touch with a lot of people that she had crossed path with during her teacher days. but am planning to buy her a computer. not that advance but i guess enough to have her own too.
,
Well, my mom has addicted to facebook and online games as well. every since my niece made an account for her, she had been in touch with a lot of people that she had crossed path with during her teacher days. but am planning to buy her a computer. not that advance but i guess enough to have her own too.
@TheAdvocate (2392)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
I think your mother deserves to do whatever she wants to do with her time now that she is at the prime of her life. I understand that it's considered an addiction, but at least she's not hurting anyone. You may consider it a waste of her time, but she sees it as time for herself, probably the time that she never had when she was raising you and your siblings. Your reason for wanting her off facebook is selfish, you want her to babysit your child and nephew. Sorry to be blunt, but that is your responsibility. Of course she can opt to help, but that is her choice. I think senior citizens should have the luxury to do as they please. It is our, that is, the younger generation's way of repaying them for their previous sacrifices.
My mother too has a lot of extra-curricular activities that keeps her busy. We do not expect her to help out in the house and in fact, she is one of chores nowadays- driving her to where she wants to go, waiting up for her to come home at night from her gimmicks with her friends, etc - because we want her to enjoy her twilight years. You will be a senior citizen in a few decades too.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
11 Jul 10
Wow, I was gonna say it's really great your mom found a hobbie as mine begin to play video game cause she never had one in her time and it's great, but she is really taking it serious. The bad thing is she being angry like that.
Maybe you can talk to her and she calm down after a while.
@wrongbe (25)
•
11 Jul 10
Everything should be in control if we do it excessively. In a few days she will feel bored or depressed if she not get a chance to visit facebook by any reason. You need to talk to her to control this habit. Please let her do it only 2-3 hours daily maximum. Tell her that the family are more inportant than facebook.
@for3verfamous (2190)
• Canada
18 Jul 10
Sounds like my mom. I made her an account on Facebook a couple years ago and now she just sits on it all day. She spends countless hours on Farmville.
Its not only that though. Its Fluff friends, FishVille, Petville and whatever other ville exists she goes on it. Its ridiculous, she barely ever goes out anymore, or goes to the store or anything. I have an urge to go on her facebook and just delete all those games.. but I'll try to keep myself from doing that.
@Force1Recon (10)
•
11 Jul 10
My mother is addicted to facebook also, its awesome because instead of taking minutes on the computer she now take hours. I'll admit I am the one that got her started and now i cant stand it lol but its good that she is keeping in touch with people lol awesome!
